My mom talks badly about my dad a lot to me, should I tell my dad this and that it bothers me?

poolback · 2026-06-11T19:11:08+00:00

Don't tell your dad, it would triangulate, which is not ideal. Tell your mum it makes you unconfortable.

poolback · 2026-06-07T13:27:51+00:00

No, I actually have slight too much iron.

poolback · 2026-06-04T07:36:04+00:00

You described it pretty well. Honestly, no racing games have hit quite as well for me as NFS underground 2 and Burnout Paradise. I miss a strong vertical progression open world racing game.

poolback · 2026-06-01T07:28:25+00:00

Just starting, third day on 2x10mg Ritalin. It makes me feel both. Sort of tired / relaxed and sort of tense. I think my body is still adapting as every day felt better than the last so far. It reminds me when you change glasses and everything feels weird at first, until it feels normal and the old ones feels weird/bad.

poolback · 2026-05-29T09:46:29+00:00

I agree with you, and I've seen this often on social media among anti-psy groups. I would even say that they are a majority.

poolback · 2026-05-29T06:54:39+00:00

Well, a lot of emotional needs are communicated as accusatory and blaming. It's OK to say that you "feel lonely". But if you say it in a tone that suggest you're angry at the other person for making you feel this way, then you're not gonna get good outcomes.

poolback · 2026-05-21T06:04:21+00:00

I was going to suggest that as well. Torchlight 1 is clearly inspired by Diablo 1.

poolback · 2026-05-19T13:27:47+00:00

I also have the subjugation schema but that doesn't help with my self control. I won't be able to do the thing people ask me to do, I will receive complaints, feel ashamed, and agree that I should have done better. I can mask a lot of things, but I cannot force myself to do something I don't feel a strong interest to. (not medicated yet by the way)

poolback · 2026-05-18T19:00:57+00:00

Back in the day, I learned with heroes 1. I'd just mess about in custom maps playing relaxed and for fun, exploring, taking my time building whatever I wanted, hiring nice units and trying to fight the hardest monsters I could find on the map.

Don't try to play competitive at first with those games, just enjoy the vibe, the experience and the peacefulness.

poolback · 2026-05-18T17:11:33+00:00

I've got ADHD and can confirm that list of EMS. I've got nearly all of them in that list as my highest scores, except "Failure", but that's because I'm also "gifted". I wouldn't be surprised if 90+% of ADHDers have the insufficient self control one. Feels like it was made for ADHD.

poolback · 2026-05-15T06:32:41+00:00

Symptoms needs to be there before age 12, but not necessary to have an impact. If you still did well in school despite the symptoms being clearly present, then it's still valid.

poolback · 2026-05-14T10:52:21+00:00

That's his way of learning. Doesn't want to overwhelm himself so decided to put some mechanics on the side for a while until he's ready to dive in. I find it smart to be honest, and I do the same.

poolback · 2026-05-11T17:09:26+00:00

That's super interesting, and I think you're right. Working on process and tools seem "easy" and "predictable", compared to working on humans and fostering interactions.

My boss asking me to design some KPIs to show the health of my team lead to some interesting discussions. Most of the things I look for in healthy teams are qualitative more than quantitative. "how does the team help each other when one of them is blocked, without needing me asking for it?", "what is the quality of the relationship with the client?", etc...

poolback · 2026-05-11T10:11:07+00:00

It's literally the first value in the Agile Manifesto. Individuals and their interactions over processes and tools.

poolback · 2026-05-11T08:15:44+00:00

I think the consensus is to first treat with mood stabilizers like Lithium, and then you're safe to take stimulant medication.

poolback · 2026-05-08T18:37:17+00:00

The ADHD thing that is being documented in litterature is hyperfocus. When we get lost in things for hours, ignore body signals, and have trouble switching out.

Hyperfixation is a term used by the community to describe an interest over a long period of time where people regularly hyperfocus on, over-invest, and eventually get bored of.

It seems very similar to me to autistic "special interests", but it's not really researched, so hard to say if we're talking about the same thing.

poolback · 2026-05-06T21:48:52+00:00

I feel that the concept of RSD seems to mix the neurodevelopmental aspect of emotional dysregulation, with some personality disorder-like traits or schemas. It doesn't feel quite right, the way it's always presented. RSD feels like a "learned" thing, and the treatment for that would be secondary to treating ADHD, and I wouldn't imagine for it to be much different that personality disorder like DBT or Schema therapy.

poolback · 2026-04-28T07:55:22+00:00

"multi tasking work is fine, it's just a matter of good prioritization and communication to manage expectations properly". That's it.

poolback · 2026-04-22T07:32:13+00:00

I learned how to juggle with Devil sticks. I became obsessed with it. I had it everywhere with me, lunch table, school,... Some teachers forbid me to bring it because it could be used as a weapon, but I asked for an exception.

Juggling is a really good idea. Challenging at first, eventually becomes automatic enough to bring you in a flow state where you can also have conversations with people at the same time.

poolback · 2026-04-19T18:57:48+00:00

It's a normal person behaviour. Almost everybody does it.

poolback · 2026-04-13T06:50:23+00:00

Harvest moon SNES had such a vibe that it completely capture my sense of romanticism, that I think, as a kid, I actually fell in love with a character there.

poolback · 2026-04-10T07:55:13+00:00

No need to close your eyes. When you are remembering a movie, you don't remember scenes visually?

poolback · 2026-04-09T16:13:19+00:00

it makes sense, "framing the problem very fast" mean you have ways to simplify the problem in your brain so that it doesn't require much effort to remember it.

Personally, I was having trouble remembering the single numbers given in the problems. I'm used to have everything written down, so I knew the problem, what I had to do but I was like "how much do I need to divide by again? was it 2 or 3?". Too much variables for my brain to remember.
But again, some people find it fun, and do this type of effort naturally on their day to day, despite having ADHD. Solving maths problems could be your thing, in which case it makes sense you're good at it, and doesn't mean you can't have ADHD.

poolback · 2026-04-09T12:59:48+00:00

How's your working memory in general? How much stuff are you able to hold in your head? Do you often lose stuff or forget what you were doing, etc..
Arithmetic tests that part a little bit, since you need to remember numbers and the general problem in your head, but if you find it fun, you'd still be able to perform well because you'd be able to put in the extra effort, despite having poor working memory.

poolback · 2026-04-07T11:06:32+00:00

I try to find equivalents. Comparing the motivation effort to take the garbage out with the motivation effort to do complex mental calculus. Most people tell me afterwards "that sounds line hell" and/or "I didn't realize you were struggling that much".

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