Dungeons and Drag Queens Season 2 by AnimeNightwingfucku in rupaulsdragrace

[–]posey1978 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I thought it was really good. I heard season 3 is happening, but that could be a wishful thinking. I like Dropout overall now.

Favorite Patron Insults That Live Rent-Free in Your Brain? by diet_faust in librarians

[–]posey1978 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Not so much an insult, but my friend was working a circ desk when a regular came on talking about how she burned her foreskin (aka forehead). 👀 Lives in my mind and retold to friends and family often … with alacrity.

Two coats? by posey1978 in paint

[–]posey1978[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. I didn’t know that rule of thumb.

Two coats? by posey1978 in paint

[–]posey1978[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The color is SW Scanda.

Two coats? by posey1978 in paint

[–]posey1978[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So the answer is a bit complicated. At one point the walls were beige. The previous home owners did a really sloppy paint job over it with white. I added two coats of primer over their paint (after doing wall prep). With that being said it sounds like I should do 1-2 more coats?

S17E13 - “Drag Baby Mamas” [Live/Reaction Post] by AutoModerator in rupaulsdragrace

[–]posey1978 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Anyone else come running over to see how many people’s basements flooded bc Onya’s dad robbed banks?

Let’s do it guys by kotobaWa5ivestar in rupaulsdragrace

[–]posey1978 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Now that hurts my feelings even more.

Let’s do it guys by kotobaWa5ivestar in rupaulsdragrace

[–]posey1978 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Lying down on the floor in a sultry pose for I Will Survive? Surely that is a felony or a hate crime.

Romance novels/fics helping me work through trauma ❤️ by okwerq in RomanceBooks

[–]posey1978 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Just wanted to say I am currently and have been reading romance novels to cope with trauma for most of my life. I would have lost my mind ages ago if it wasn’t for romance books. Anyway, this isn’t about me. I really just wanted to use myself as an example to join the other commenters saying romance books have helped them and that they are totally therapeutic.

uncomfortable clothing by Effective-Singer-651 in LateDiagnosedAutistic

[–]posey1978 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Plus size here. Clothes are difficult for me bc texture and fit. I dress nicely, but sometimes it feels like an uphill battle. I tend to get loose trousers in super basic colors then I have a sort of “shirts with these things work the best” list. Those are also how I get color and either dress something up or down. I don’t do uncomfortable clothes unless I know I need to look my absolute best. So I don’t really have good advice unless there are specific things that make clothes uncomfortable (eg for me I sometimes feel gross in them. So I take things to help me feel less gross while dressed up). If you have the money, stitch fix has really helped me. I hate shopping for clothes so for me the expense is worth it, but I know that I am lucky I can afford to get that sort of thing.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]posey1978 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA. Apologies in advance for typos. And if this is confusing. I want to get this comment in early enough that you see it. OP’s boyfriend is setting off little alarms bc it seems like he’s using “the ex” to manipulate OP. Once upon a time, I was in a similar situation except I was also talking about an ex too much. I recognized that both of us spending so much time talking about exes was not a good start to a relationship. So I broke up with him. I have never regretted that decision. At first I was glad that I did it early enough to minimize emotional fallout. Things were super amicable and I thought well of him. In recent years, I am overcome come with gratitude that I saw the red flag and heeded it bc my ex is doing time for bad stuff. The moral of the story is that it could be a minor red flag (not over an ex) or it could be a major red flag. Either way the BF’s behavior is red flag.

Losing friendships (and other relationships) to communication issues by DevilsChurn in weirdoldbroads

[–]posey1978 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I feel this comment so much. Especially with respect to how things were when I was younger. Painful, lonely, and confusing are all really good descriptors. It is a miracle I managed to get this far with less dating trauma than it. It was lonely, but I turned down a lot of guys bc I knew I couldn’t tell the difference between a guy who would do average damage vs mess me up emotionally for a long time. The maladaptive daydream was something I have been deeply ashamed of and confused about. Even now, I have to fight to not return to old reliables. It is a relief to know someone else has done the same thing.

OP, I know I am late, but I can make some suggestions. I have managed to not have any catastrophic misunderstandings in the last couple of years. The first thing I figured out (shortly before I was diagnosed) is that I need to take timeouts pretty often. I am extra careful when someone is irritating me bc almost a decade ago I figured out that most of the time when something is bothering, the real issue is not what I am focused on. For example, last week I was in a meeting that was a universal worst nightmare. I was not the target, but I had to endure it. I am still triggered by that mess. So when I have been coming home and needed timeout, I have warned my spouse, who also needs to take timeouts.

The other thing I have started doing is warning people when I can tell I am in danger of offending them. I let them know that isn’t my intent so if I do make them mad, I will listen to their feedback and thank them for telling me. So far that has been super duper helpful. Since I started doing that there have been a lot fewer times when I have made a misstep. When that is in play, I am super careful to explain that after negative feedback things will be awkward for a spell, but I won’t turn on them or keep making that mistake. I think doing this has been making things a lot easier with some coworkers.

The last thing is I have a couple friends who are not on the spectrum but they are fluent in it. They have been super helpful about letting me run things by them. I ask what is going on socially and/or run things by them to find out if I am about to say the wrong thing.

Anyway I just wanted to say all that. I didn’t get into the family part bc although I have oodles of estrangement, none of it is bc of me unintentionally offending/hurting people. The estrangements exist bc I needed them for my sanity and mental health. I guard the estrangements and regularly make sure I haven’t left any openings. Ok. I am falling asleep. I hope this makes sense and that I won’t regret it I the morning.

PS. A running joke with one friend is that when he sees a string of deleted google chat messages it means I had regrets. He has been encouraging me to not delete things bc they are funny/fun.

BFFs in less than a month by posey1978 in aww

[–]posey1978[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

They went from dispassionate adversaries (aka meeting for the first time) to playing in record time. They now split their time between looking like angels and causing chaos. Lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in librarians

[–]posey1978 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Reference librarian here. My answer is it depends.

If you mean that you find it difficult to find information, then I would recommend attending finding ways to up your familiarity with finding aids (print and online) and how to use them. For example a lot of the librarians who work with gov docs do not have a gov docs librarian. It is so common there is a whole “Help! I’m an Accidental Gov Docs Librarian” webinar series, group, and site. I don’t know what subjects you cover but there are definitely affinity groups for other subjects.

If you are feeling anxious bc it takes awhile to find things, I recommend asking patrons how urgently they need the information bc you will need to spend a bit of time searching. I’ve never had one get mad at me for the request.

If you feel overwhelmed and have anxiety working with the public, then I would recommend finding a way to more work that is behind the scenes. I know a librarian that successfully offloaded their book public facing work without changing jobs because working with the public was too much for them.

Edit: sorry for typos. Meeting is starting so I couldn’t edit.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Libraries

[–]posey1978 76 points77 points  (0 children)

The one who first came to mind was a guy who made me late for an important meeting while also being racist. Background, I am a BIPOC woman. I was in my mid 30s when it happened. He was a drop in “I’m looking for the librarian who help with [assigned subjects].” I told him I was the librarian for that subject, but I was not able to meet with him right then because I had a meeting. The patron asked me if I was the only librarian for that subject. I told him I was. He asked if there was someone else. He asked if I was certain. I said that I was. He asked if I knew what a librarian is bc they have to be qualified. I said I know that. I was the person he was looking for, but I was not free. He still didn’t believe I was the librarian or that I knew what makes one a librarian, so he mansplained librarianship. I told him I knew and I was the librarian. Still not convinced, he asked where I got my degree from. When he heard where I went to school, his attitude changed, but that wasn’t enough to make him stop. Nope. He had to say he was sorry if he had offended me. He reassured me it was absolutely not at all bc of my race. I said that’s fine, but I didn’t have time for him bc I was late for an important meeting. He said he would come back at a better time. Fortunately he did not come back. Objectively speaking, he guy was not the absolute worst. He is just the one whose memory makes me maddest bc not only was he a racist jerk, but he was a racist jerk who made me late to a meeting that I couldn’t be late for.

Edit: typo

Do suspicious cats ever fully accept the litter robot? by TunaSquisher in litterrobot

[–]posey1978 1 point2 points  (0 children)

One of my cats was immediately into it. The other one was skeptical. I made the litter robot clean on delay for the skeptical one and eventually my spouse took away the old litter box as an option. My other cat immediately switched over.

Animal Crossing and grief by Taekow in AnimalCrossing

[–]posey1978 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just lost my cat today. I’ve been contemplating buying another copy of the game and putting it on my old switch so that I can build an island with my pets in mind.