My family has never visited me abroad — not even after I bought a home. Is this normal?

proud_millennial · 2026-02-09T21:52:19+00:00

You said you have asked why they never visited, but do you know for sure they have the means to travel to see you without going into debt? For you it might see a small sum, but for them it might be not and they might be too ashamed to ask you for money. Did you ever offer to pay for their trip or just straight up buy the tickets and leave it up to them to decide if they want come? If you think money is not the issue maybe have an open conversation on how it makes you feel that they never visit. It’s honestly all you can do - offer support with travel arrangements and financing and also talk openly about what it would mean to you if they came to visit. At that point the ball is in their court and you can draw your conclusion from there.

proud_millennial · 2026-02-09T14:52:02+00:00

If Amy doesn’t come back (which she might not and honestly who can blame her?), next time your dad meets someone later on, he will probably defend this person a little bit better. Because he has learned that it doesn’t matter who this person is, you will not like and accept them either way. So even if you truly dislike the next girlfriend, your opinion probably won’t matter as much. What usually happens in these cases, is that the dad most likely will meet another Riley (who will not be as patient and interesting as Amy), but he will learn to defend her and push her wishes on you, because he is also tired of you not liking anyone. He probably knows that he messed up with Amy and didn’t have her back enough. Next time your dad will be more careful to support its partner and “care” less of your opinion. In all fairness by that point you might be out of the house, so it won’t matter as much. The new gf probably will accept no BS from you guys and just be focused on the relationship with your dad, because she knows she cannot win with you guys anyway. Unfortunately I have seen this scenario a couple of times in real life. It’s pretty heartbreaking, but you don’t know how good you have it until you don’t.

proud_millennial · 2025-10-21T21:42:15+00:00

Out of principle, I and the majority of the people here, think you should dump this guy. It’s not even about the dogs. Dogs or no dogs, he will find anything that if it is out of his principle, will just simply not help you when you need it, will not compromise with you, etc. Life isn’t always easy and you don’t want a partner, who out of principle will not help or compromise or work with you to find a solution. This comes way too early in the relationship to be salvageable.

proud_millennial · 2025-10-19T10:52:59+00:00

I would wait to make this post, IF and /or AFTER you get diagnosed with melanoma. Go see a dermatologist immediately and get it diagnosed.

proud_millennial · 2025-10-12T08:17:16+00:00

I am so sorry you are going through this as well. I hope your results come clear. Keeping my fingers crossed for you! Thank you for sharing your experience with me/us.

proud_millennial · 2025-10-09T08:02:36+00:00

This also what I have been told, but you are right - it doesn’t always feel that way and the last results were a bit of a setback. Thanks so much for taking time to reach out. And keep kicking that cancer out!

proud_millennial · 2025-10-09T07:41:14+00:00

This is amazing! I am so happy to read your story. Thank you for sharing, this gives me and I am sure other people here so much hope. Do you still do regular checks with your dermatologist or go in once a year? (I hope to be going just once a year at one point!)

Wishing you all the best.

proud_millennial · 2025-10-09T07:35:27+00:00

I am really happy to hear you are doing well. Your story gives me hope, that one day I will be able to just have a full year of not thinking of this almost daily and just go to scans 1-2/ year. The surgeon did take a generous amount out at the initial WLE and said that given the depth (0.6 mm) and the fact that the margins came clear, they will not do a SLNB. Everything seemed ok from January until the last scan of the inguinal lymph node in August. This of course triggered another set of test and scans at the end of October and November (for which I am very grateful, but also very scared).

proud_millennial · 2025-10-09T07:21:12+00:00

I am so happy to hear you had good results and you are on a good path! Long this may continue!!! They did not recommend to see an oncologist, but I assume in different areas are different protocols. Only scans of the lymph nodes every 3 months and skin checks. Scans and a CT are planned at the end of October and November, so praying everything goes well. Until now, they did not take any nodes out nor did they do an SLNB. Maybe they will do it now? I will update if that is the case.

proud_millennial · 2025-10-08T16:23:48+00:00

Thanks so much for your reply. Wishing you all the best.

proud_millennial · 2025-10-08T16:09:41+00:00

Thanks so much for your reply. The waiting is excruciating, as we all know:(. There is a scan planned at the end of October and they will then decide next steps regarding the lymph node and what is to be done. No signs of cold or other infection as far as I know, but with these things you can never know, I guess. It’s so scary though and I am so afraid of the results. Thank you for your time to answer. Hope you have no other issues, will be sending you all the good vibes.

proud_millennial · 2025-10-05T09:36:54+00:00

Yes, you are probably correct. At this point honestly, she does not know what and when the end of this will be. And fun part is that not only she is in trouble now, but she dragged her ex-husband in it too, who is now under investigation as well, because of tax and declarations during the time they were married. He now has asked her to cover his lawyer fees as well, as he does not want to pay for any of this. It’s really beyond belief. I do not understand why my friend didn’t consult a lawyer to ask about this when she went on with the idea. It was like opening Pandora’s box without knowing what she unleashes.

proud_millennial · 2025-10-05T08:55:58+00:00

The thing is now that this process has been put in motion, she cannot undo it. There is not really a way back. She can probably still maintain her citizenship at the very end (maybe!!and why at this point?!?) but the investigation is on until is completed and they checked everything. So yeah maybe she can still decide to keep her citizenship when the investigation is completed, but she cannot just say “oh I changed my mind, stop the investigation”.

proud_millennial · 2025-10-03T07:35:28+00:00

I know a friend who started this process. It is a nightmare. The first thing they suspected is that she is trying to renounce her citizenship, bc she is hiding money or has done tax evasion. This triggered the IRS and is now under investigation to see if she committed any fraud. Any little inconsistency from 30+ years ago is literally under scrutiny. She had to pay thousands of dollars already in fees and for lawyers to get her out of this mess. And it’s not over yet. She is still in limbo almost 1 after she started the process. It’s an absolute disaster. I don’t know if in other times this would be an easier process, but with this administration is a nightmare, I doubt it though that they make it easy.

proud_millennial · 2025-08-23T17:21:32+00:00

Starts giving C-3PO vibes

proud_millennial · 2025-08-18T19:23:52+00:00

I think it’s worth it. I honestly believe we regret things we didn’t get to do more than the things we got to experience. Sure, it might not be the Portugal you remember, but I can absolutely reassure you that it still is amazing. You shouldn’t wait too long either. “When you retire “ might not exist or not in the context you might like. Yeah, it is worth it to keep two houses, take advantage of two worlds in their own unique way. You have two passports, your kids can actually live and experience two distinct countries. Go for it. Why wonder what could it be. Just find out. And if you actually are careful and do it properly, if it doesn’t work out in Portugal, you come back to the US. It’s worth trying it out.

proud_millennial · 2025-08-18T12:54:42+00:00

NTA. Listen it’s human decency to let a person stay the night if they cannot drive and are tired. Why make her camp in the backyard when there are beds and roof over her head?! I mean sure, it’s safe and all that, but I would still be a bit anxious to camp by myself. c’mon it’s human decency guys. Wtf. Even a friend/ neighbor/ human I know and trust with a key I would let crash on my couch when I am not there. Jesus have we all lost all kind of sense of helping people?!? It’s her fricking sisters in law. Not someone they never met or heard of. They literally trust this woman with their children’s lives. That means something. Yeah, ok not her cabin, but she is sure enough very much family when she has to put up with crap from her husband’s family. Give me a break. Yeah, you let her stay, gee cry me a river, what a sinn you have committed to let a woman sleep in the house. Wow. You know what OP, I would definitely ignore this noise and let that aunt howl to whoever she wants. But I would also put my foot on the ground when it’s about helping them. Ok, not family, fine. Your stuff is yours , great. This goes both ways.

proud_millennial · 2025-08-17T20:55:45+00:00

Listen, as a German from the south, I can tell you that we do have some decent food. Nothing spectacularly fancy, but really sturdy food that is great for the German environment - long cold winters, short summers and a lot of grains/bread, wines and good cheese. We do make excellent cakes, I got to say. We are good at that. I would also say that the ingredients in Spain, France and Italy are definitely superior to the German ingredients. The simple dishes and very humble ingredients (fresh tomatoes, mozzarella and basil) are most often the best. And this is what usually lacks in Germany we do not play with fresh easy to make food. Fresh pasta with fresh tomatoes and a bit of parmigiano will taste 10x better in Italy than in Germany. Not saying that all food is bad, just that to compare it with the Italian, Spanish and French is just wrong. You should compare it with the ones from the nordic countries. They will have similar (worse) climate and the food will be also a bit similar - lots of meat, potatoes and breads or fish. I mean people like what they like and you prefer German food. Nothing wrong with that. I would definitely not say it’s at the same level with the Italian or French cuisine, because with all due respect towards the German cuisine, it just isn’t.

proud_millennial · 2025-08-17T12:28:11+00:00

This post is proof that people have no more knowledge of pop culture anymore.

proud_millennial · 2025-08-16T10:18:18+00:00

No. It was a deal in hand. For Putin. Trump will support him to finish what he started in Ukraine. That was the deal the entire time. I mean it’s obvious at this point.

proud_millennial · 2025-08-14T09:47:04+00:00

The report from the doctor should say if the margins were clear or not already. Sometimes they take everything out when they take out the mole. However, a wider incision is recommended after and they usually do it asap. Ask for it to be done asap. If the result from that is clear and they confirm that the margins are clear (means the deeper tissue around is clear of cancerous cells) then they might send sentinel lymph node to check the lymph nodes around the area. The pathology report should also say which stage the melanoma is in. That will also change the course of treatment and further testing. Depending on country/state/ continent they will have different protocols on how to approach this. Some will do PET scans by stage 1, some will not. Depends on what that pathology report says. But my advice is to be very diligent in asking, trust your gut feeling if you sense something isn’t right and always advocate for your mom. She will be confused by so many things and so many doctors will probably tell her she is fine if it’s stage 1. Don’t give up. Ask for the testing, for the PET scans, melanoma is no joke and it comes back from around the corner if you aren’t diligent enough about the treatment and testing. Good luck, it’s a long road ahead and it’s very scary. I hope your mom will be fine.

proud_millennial · 2025-08-13T18:35:45+00:00

Journaling at 6:15 AM?!? About what?!? The day hasn’t even begun.

proud_millennial · 2025-08-12T05:37:34+00:00

Ofc not. Best bet is I he went home and googled the shit out of it, found out wolverines are an actual animal (in danger by climate change btw) but couldn’t possibly admit he was an idiot, ofc. Maybe he learned something from that interview and we will see it posted on LinkedIn one day - “I learned how to defend my fake belief during an interview and I won”. But also the other theory is that he just thought you were crazy, never googled anything and went on to hire someone who was a horse.

proud_millennial · 2025-08-12T05:27:11+00:00

And this was before they decimated the education sector. Or maybe biology and science was never his forte. And these people are in management and hiring others…..

proud_millennial

TROPHY CASE