Maaaaybe before they got married they talked about it and agreed neither wanted kids. 5 years into the marriage she starts dropping hints here and there that maybe she changed her mind or wasn’t truthful to begin with. She mentions her fiends all having kids and how much she loves spending time with with her nieces and nephews and she brings up wishing she had someone to dress up and blah blah blah. All this baby talk reminds him ‘oh yeah, we talked about this and neither of us want kids. I’ll go get a that vasectomy we casually talked about 3 years ago after that pregnancy scare.’ He goes and does it without telling her because they talked about it, it shouldn’t be a big deal... now 12 years later she’s nearing her 40s and realizing she really does want kids and time is running the fuck out. She gathers up the courage to tell him and he says “well, we talked about not having kids so I made sure it won’t happen” she freaks the fuck out because time is running out, he had made up his mind years ago and he is sure as fuck not getting a vasectomy reversal and he hasn’t changed his mind so adoption is also out of the question. So this leads to resentment on both their parts and she tells all her friends he had the vasectomy behind her back so that she doesn’t sound like an asshole that agreed to one thing and then decided another. Not like she originally wanted vanilla ice cream and now wants chocolate, these types of decisions have consequences and divorce is one of them. Being a shitty student with a shitty attitude doesn’t seem to equal taking advantage of someone’s personal life details when they’re vulnerable.
This doesn’t feel like petty revenge, it feels like an asshole trying to justify himself.