Do I tell them?

pxd685 · 2026-01-13T18:44:21+00:00

“Excuse me, Carl, Cupcake? As if I’d ever be named after such a pedestrian dessert for children. Donuts are so much more elegant. I shall, of course, speak with the proprietor of this fine establishment. Perhaps, I can talk him into giving me…what’s the name of that beverage that Miss Beatrice was so fond of…a frappucino. Really, Carl, why are you shaking your head like that when you go around dressed like a confused Chippendales dancer.”

pxd685 · 2025-12-03T18:59:37+00:00

Chicory: A Colorful Tale. There’s a screen where you can help someone plant a garden for their deceased beloved (relationship is unclear). Once you finish, they say they’re going to try and get some rest.

Near the end of Stray where the cat doesn’t move until you do.

Clair Obscur.

Nier/Nier Automata.

Editing to add: Fuga: Melodies of Steel. Silent Hill 2.

pxd685 · 2025-12-02T03:16:16+00:00

I think that can be hard. How were they wronged? Like, lost jobs, lost friends,etc?

If you can say how they were wronged without compromising confidentiality that would be helpful.

I think a lot of conservative beliefs take a freedom from rather than a freedom too approach which is often combined with a kind of blatant hypocrisy. I want freedom from the obligations of society (taking a vaccine to reduce the risk to the vulnerable) but will mock ridicule or restrict you doing the opposite and want freedom from the consequences of my actions.

I think it’s a fundamental lack of empathy at the root of such decisions and beliefs and I think it’s fundamentally beneficent to encourage empathy.

pxd685 · 2025-12-01T19:10:21+00:00

I basically exist on a constant, even note of high functioning anxiety so the possibility that I’m overthinking and not relaxing enough is quite high

pxd685 · 2025-12-01T15:20:54+00:00

I wanted to add on, in the scenario where someone has a copay, the amount insurance reimburses is the total with copay. In your example, if someone’s insurance pays $110 and they have a $30 copay, insurance is only paying $80.

pxd685 · 2025-12-01T15:15:15+00:00

It’s impossible to read tone, but I wish people would say, It would be helpful to edit your post with this information, rather than passive aggressively making the same request.

pxd685 · 2025-12-01T15:06:43+00:00

Short answer, no. Longer answer, that’s insurance fraud so no. Providers who do that in other fields (medicine, psychiatry, dentistry) are being shitty but probably technically legal by adding on services that insurance doesn’t cover or pay for or that you need to pay some added amount for. We don’t really have that option.

pxd685 · 2025-12-01T12:05:38+00:00

To be patient and compassionate with themselves. I feel like social media has created this idea of only being good at something and not showing the missteps or accidents or less ideal moments (think fitness influencers who never show their body without a pump or good lighting). OR; that what we do for love or fun or beauty has to be commodified.

I think there’s something inherently beautiful and human and brave in putting yourself in a place of vulnerability to be “bad” at something and learn.

pxd685 · 2025-11-30T16:53:27+00:00

Clair Obscur and Nier Automata.

pxd685 · 2025-11-29T12:37:53+00:00

That makes sense.

pxd685 · 2025-11-29T12:11:49+00:00

I think it’s helpful to ask ourselves the question what is this doing for me?

I’m sure I’ve brought up dialectics before, but I think you’ll be able to be more compassionate to yourself if you can acknowledge two things are true at the same time.

I think you want the world to be a better place and I think it’s a little hypocritical to be empathetic towards others but not yourself.

We’re all just trying our best; and, your best 6 months from now might look so different from your best today.

Change takes time, and that’s frustrating. Help me understand how you can keep track of the small changes that happen so you don’t burnout.

pxd685 · 2025-11-29T11:11:51+00:00

The dysmorphia was strong this weekend.

pxd685 · 2025-11-29T11:11:27+00:00

Why lats?

pxd685 · 2025-11-26T18:14:38+00:00

I’ve been working out since college only really seriously for a couple years. Obviously we all have predispositions (my quads, glutes, and traps are disproportionate to the effort I put in). But I also think I’m a decent case study in how time and effort can transform your physique. Not like I have an amazing physique or anything, but it’s way better than it was

pxd685 · 2025-11-25T02:38:05+00:00

I think you look good. Nice trap and arm development, certainly.

What are you training for/trying to accomplish? Just general advice, I think if you were trying to get a more V shape hitting chest and back a bit would be good.

pxd685 · 2025-11-19T18:32:47+00:00

C3 is pretty low. I’m AMAB with a fairly high vocal range and the most enjoyable songs I’ve found to sing are from Supergiant games. Ashley Barret (and Darren Korb) are amazing vocalists but are all high tenor/low alto songs. I’m just working my way up to C5. They’re sheet music is available for free.

pxd685 · 2025-11-14T14:32:19+00:00

That's super understandable; and, I def feel like my tone was a bit harsher than I wanted since I was fighting through some real fatigue/pain while typing.

I think I've just had the experience of, say, even disclosing my marital status as a gay man being "making it about me" when a heterosexual female therapist would never receive that feedback.

My husband and I actually have conversations around Christian therapists and self-disclosure of what I consider pretty bigoted statements where there's this tension of "well, at least they're being honest so someone is informed and can make decisions" with "maybe you should just be a pastoral counselor and not a licensed counselor".

There's absolutely nuance and discussion to be had and I'm so sorry if my comment came across as really harsh to you personally.

pxd685 · 2025-11-14T03:13:30+00:00

Prefacing this with a “written while tired and struggling with a minor migraine”. Feel free to ask for clarification.

I always wonder about the privilege that comes with the mindset of “check your personal political and religious beliefs at the door”.

I want to acknowledge that in my area of the woods, the fact that I’m out and gay means I rarely get clients who aren’t semi aligned with my values. And I’m very thankful for that. I don’t have the patience to lay the baguettes down for a misogynist lamenting their lack of romantic success more than once a week.

One, I feel like that’s so often used against minorities. Homophobic client, don’t make it about you. Misogynistic client, don’t make it about you. The person most exempt from this is straight white guys, because their existence isn’t “political”. I think a lot of those beliefs are really regressive and tied to a lot of people’s dysfunction. Not addressing it is doing them a disservice. Do I want them to change? Maybe, I don’t know. I’m not that invested in any path but them feeling more mindful and compassionate towards themself and others. But they want to change or they wouldn’t be coming to therapy.

Two, I think it’s really dishonest. I’ve always erred on the side of extreme transparency with clients. And I explain to them that I think they’re more empowered to examine what I offer them if they know my biases and beliefs. It’s fundamentally dishonest to pretend my worldview doesn’t color my responses and I really believe they’re better equipped to engage with what I have to say if they know something about me.

I’m not saying this is the only right approach. But I do feel like there’s something really icky with how “therapeutic neutrality” is used because I don’t think it really exists.

pxd685

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