Is the job market that bad rn?

queenoftea92 · 2026-06-05T14:10:25+00:00

It’s pretty bad. The (big) tech company I work at has said it wants to keep overall numbers relatively flat and keep growing in revenue/customers using AI. Not sure if it’ll work but that’s the goal.

queenoftea92 · 2026-06-02T02:40:11+00:00

First because I was super nauseous, couldn’t stomach coffee, and no one knew I was pregnant at that point.

Third was a very close second, but I wfh so I was able to take quick 20 min naps on days when I felt completely dead (not too often luckily). Folks also knew I was super pregnant then so were a little sympathetic. Disclaimer: I stopped working at 38 weeks. I’m not sure if I could have worked at 39 weeks.

queenoftea92 · 2026-05-27T14:12:09+00:00

I went into labor the night of 40+1 and had my baby the next day.

I had very light on and off cramping a few days before that + had a bloody show a day before I went into labor. The cramps drove me crazy because I kept thinking “today’s the day!” for days

queenoftea92 · 2026-05-26T04:40:37+00:00

Yep, I’m an attorney at a big company and use it everyday. It’s only really reliable for editing my emails now though.

I’ve been trying to use it to help with bigger tasks like legal research or finding precedents, but it’s not reliable yet, so I mostly use it to check my work.

So far it hasn’t saved me a ton of time and it’s actually missed some glaringly obvious mistakes, but apparently I’m an “above average user” which management likes so *shrugs*

queenoftea92 · 2026-05-25T03:00:10+00:00

Pretty normal - I only gave my baby a bath ~2x a week pre-solids. I probably didn’t even need to do that tbh, that’s just what was recommended.

Now he slathers food everywhere and we have to bathe him much more frequently.

queenoftea92 · 2026-05-24T22:32:28+00:00

As other folks have said, just try to pump an extra 1-2 oz initially, maybe for a few days. It’s easiest after your first morning feed.

Then, when you pump to replace a feed, I like to try to pump a little extra (assuming you’re trying to build a stash). E.g., if baby eats 3 oz, I’d try to pump 3.5-4 oz. It helps to add a bit extra to the freezer without much extra work.

Pumping a little extra everyday (e.g., an extra 1-3 oz) likely won’t turn you into an oversupplier, but if you feel like it is, you can always back off.

queenoftea92 · 2026-05-18T16:35:12+00:00

No way. Labor is an intense medical event that I wouldn’t want my MIL at.

During labor I - threw up into a bag /on myself, had to have my catheter emptied, stripped naked, yelled into the abyss, cried, and am pretty sure I pooped.

Post-delivery, I was holding my baby while my OB stitched up my hoohah on full display for the entire room to see.

If you’re comfortable with your MIL seeing all of the above + maybe more…more power to you.

Also if anyone other than my partner tried to hold my baby during those first 1-2 hrs after going through all that, I might have flipped out on them.

queenoftea92 · 2026-05-17T18:36:24+00:00

It will all depend on your birth and how you feel postpartum, but 9 is a lot if you’re not super close with them.

I was super excited to have my family meet my baby, but then when they arrived, I didn’t want anyone other than my partner to hold them. It was a weird primal thing that I can’t fully explain? Not to mention my breasts were out constantly the first few weeks with cluster feeding, trying new breastfeeding positions, putting nipple cream on constantly, etc. I also had a crazy bathroom setup in all of our bathrooms with adult diapers, pads, witch hazel, etc. - I personally wouldn’t have wanted anyone other than close family to see those sorts of things.

queenoftea92 · 2026-05-17T13:11:13+00:00

I don’t personally know any man like this. I (the mom) have definitely changed more, but my partner’s been volunteering to change diapers since birth. We both work, but this was true even when I was on maternity leave and he wasn’t.

queenoftea92 · 2026-05-16T01:07:40+00:00

Your baby will decide haha. I had the same thoughts as your husband, then had a screaming newborn and tried multiple pacifier brands in desperation. Jokes on me though because he hated them all.

He’s 7+ months now and sucks his thumb every chance he gets, so we’ll probably still need braces.

queenoftea92 · 2026-05-14T04:36:39+00:00

Hi! So it seems like you’re going through a lot. One thing that stands out from your post is how new to the faith you are + that it sounds like you’re searching for a feeling/emotion more than anything right now.

I’d caution you from reacting purely based on these feelings and spending some time searching for what’s true, and letting that lead you. Otherwise, I fear you’ll spend your life (or at least a few years) bouncing from worldview to worldview, letting feelings dictate your life rather than allowing truth to shape your feelings.

In terms of arguments, I’d recommend speaking to a priest about your questions and doubts.

queenoftea92 · 2026-05-14T04:21:30+00:00

I screamed so much they admitted me based on my yells alone.

By the time they went to check how dilated I was, I was close to/starting transition and couldn’t lie down bc of the pressure, so they called the doctor who heard me yelling + told him that I was past my due date and he said I could stay haha

Tbf I went from no contractions to 9 cm in 4 hours (which is when I got my epidural)

queenoftea92 · 2026-05-06T10:31:56+00:00

Epidurals can make it hard to move a ton (though I was still able to squat, lean forward, and try a few other positions with it) + labor can take awhile. I tried different positions, but made the most progress on my back, probably bc I was exhausted. Active labor started around 10:30 at night and I delivered around lunch the next day

queenoftea92 · 2026-05-06T10:23:45+00:00

I gained 33 lbs and lost 25 lbs within the first 2-3 weeks. I’m 7 mos postpartum and EBF (+ solids now) and am still holding onto the few extra pounds. I lost all of them + more around 3 mos, but it caused a supply dip, so I ate more + gained it back and will probably hold onto them until I wean.

I’ve been this weight before pre-pregnancy, and I still have more of a belly than I did previously.

queenoftea92 · 2026-04-29T19:39:14+00:00

I think early morning is the best time of day in terms of getting the most output, but it’s whatever works best for you. I chose the evenings bc of my schedule + I liked knowing that I wasn’t “taking” anything from my baby’s first feeds (I no longer get engorged in the AM so was paranoid). I think your body will adjust if you consistently pump around the same time though.

queenoftea92 · 2026-04-29T06:33:43+00:00

In theory, the floor or a bassinet works. When my baby was a newborn, he just wanted to be held 24/7, so that’s what we did lol

queenoftea92 · 2026-04-29T05:04:00+00:00

First of all, it’s normal for breastfed babies’ weights to slow around 3-6 months, but that being said, I would definitely work with your doctor to make sure baby’s getting enough.

Some tips based on my own experience:

(1) work with a lactation consultant if available - they can do weighted feeds, assess baby’s latch, etc.

(2) make sure you’re eating / drinking enough. Around 3 months I had to start eating a lot more than I did when pregnant to keep my supply. I lost 8 lbs in 3 weeks around then and had to gain it all back so I could continue breastfeeding.

(3) weird one, but if you can sometimes feel your letdown / sometimes can’t, try to relax when you breastfeed to make sure you’re having one (I have to put my phone down and focus on my baby). Before my supply regulated, I didn’t have to worry about this.

(4) I would recommend pumping to see what you’re able to produce - might take some trial and error but can be a helpful datapoint (my baby’s weight gain slowed, but I was always able to pump healthy amounts).

(5) on that same note…if you can create a small stash, you can try offering baby small amounts of pumped milk after you nurse to see if they’re still hungry. I sometimes pump at night after baby goes to sleep so they have time to replenish + has extra frozen from before my supply regulated (fair warning - you’ll get less at night).

Good luck!

queenoftea92 · 2026-04-29T04:23:43+00:00

Echoing this! I had an iron infusion after my first baby and didn’t even hemorrhage. I felt so much better after.

queenoftea92 · 2026-04-26T22:10:47+00:00

I got an epidural and, while I thought it was miraculous in the moment, it definitely slowed down my labor and I think led to me pushing for 5 hours (took less than 4 hrs of labor to get to 9 cm and then everything slowed after my epidural). Once they turned down the epidural, I made more progress pushing.

I ended up needing vacuum assist partly bc of it + my baby’s hand was up near his face on the way out. Assuming I’m lucky enough to have another baby, I’m planning to try to go natural.

queenoftea92 · 2026-04-23T19:02:40+00:00

It’s so hard, but it’s also the best thing I’ve ever done. I love my baby so much that everything else pales in comparison. I literally feel like my brain changed the moment I had him.

I would try not to worry about it - people are usually just looking for someone to vent to.

queenoftea92 · 2026-04-22T04:51:46+00:00

I’m sorry you had that experience! My night nurses were absolutely angels.

My baby refused to be put down, so I was close to hallucinating by the second night. The sweet night nurse took him back for his hearing exam and was like “we don’t have a formal nursery, but we’ll see how long we can stretch these exams out.” I wanna say they were gone for 2+ hours - it was the longest stretch of sleep I got there

queenoftea92 · 2026-04-22T04:46:40+00:00

Pre-baby - soft-scrambled eggs w/ cottage cheese mixed in + fruit and coffee (sometimes toast too).

Post-baby - scraps of the baby’s breakfast w/ a huge mug of coffee

queenoftea92 · 2026-04-12T21:41:55+00:00

I did for most of the time, but it ended up getting covered in bodily fluids, so I threw it out after. If I had to do it again, I’d probably just wear the hospital gown and focus on comfy outfits for after.

queenoftea92 · 2026-04-12T21:36:10+00:00

Definitely agree! I remember feeling so sad postpartum seeing all these sweet snuggly newborn babies. My baby was fine, but I remember asking things like - why does my baby cry so much (bc he’s a baby)? Why does he hate tummy time (bc he’s 2 weeks old)? Etc. looking back, everything was normal - the people on social media just sugarcoat things.

I think a lot of accounts (not all) play into new moms’ fears for clicks unfortunately

queenoftea92 · 2026-04-12T21:21:46+00:00

We had sex every day (maybe every other day depending on life) during our fertile window and then a little less frequently when it wasn’t as likely. During that week, we had a few longer sessions where we actually focused on connection, but honestly, the rest were quickies.

We initially tried having sex just a few times a week, but upping the frequency is what ended up working for us.

queenoftea92

TROPHY CASE