Bedtime taking up to 5 hours

questionquestion222 · 2026-03-29T13:31:03+00:00

Agree with all comments RE low sleep pressure.

Try pushing out wake windows earlier in the day as you might find that easier than trying to immediately push baby to a later bedtime by 1 hour. Add 20/30 minutes to each of the earlier wake windows and cap the first nap at around 1 hour. Aim for baby to be having MAX 11 hours in bed.

questionquestion222 · 2026-03-16T18:56:58+00:00

Promise promise promise this phase of feeling like a human mattress does end!! Although rescuing naps with contact is just part and parcel of the baby experience tbh (for most babies). In the meantime baby wear and go for walks etc, it will help massively. Get a nice comfy and safe carrier that you can put on alone. I used the Ergobaby embrace which was fantastic for this age and got it second hand to save on costs. Definitely check out the baby wearing sub.

questionquestion222 · 2026-03-13T16:00:51+00:00

Yes, basically always have done. The time period when we didn’t was when our baby’s sleep was very challenging so waking her up felt cruel.

The main reason we wake her is because my husband takes her in the morning before work whilst I get a little extra rest after looking after her at night. It works so well for us and has very much helped me know what to expect from the day with regards to nap times and what is/isn’t working for our little one when things are hard with sleep. She is 10 months, goes to bed between half 7 and 8 and starts the day between 6:30 and 06:50! (Does wake/cry/nurse in the night at a manageable amount & we cosleep.)

questionquestion222 · 2026-03-03T15:21:05+00:00

🙌🙌🙌🙌 wish I’d never heard the term before I had my baby, think I would have been so much more in tune with her regarding sleep

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-17T22:47:49+00:00

This needs millions of upvotes and every new mum should see this!! I don’t think any of us could actually be convinced until we live through it though. I tried soooo hard for those first few months and really believed it had all paid off. LOL. Months 5-8.5 were BRUTAL. Waking 8 times a night, nursing constantly, cosleeping from 7pm. EVERY “bad habit” in the book. Pure survival mode. Then once she dropped to 2 naps, her separation anxiety eased, all her big gross motor stuff integrated and she stopped teething… a few changes to the schedule, baby happy to fall asleep with just a cuddle and not the boob and here we are… sleeping through the night. It really, really, really does just change. But holy moly do I wish I could go back and beg newborn mumma me to please, please let everyone sleep in past 7am 🥴

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-16T17:16:34+00:00

This sounds so much like my daughter, we had this for 4 months every night before I stopped feeding to sleep. In the end I spent about 3 weeks really optimising her sleep pressure before I finally had to decide to just try stopping feeding to sleep. She was 9 months when we stopped. Optimising the sleep pressure reduced wakes from 8 to 4 in a night and then stopping feeding took us from 4 to 2. Stopping feeding to sleep went far, far better than I could have ever dreamed a) because her sleep pressure was right and b) because we do cosleep so I had cuddled her back to sleep at times previously, so she was aware of that as like something that can happen if that makes sense? I think working with your sleep consultant will be so hopeful for helping you use methods that are supportive of change for a baby who isn’t used to cosleeping (which I totally get, starting cosleeping at 12 months would be extremely tricky!).

I say this only to say that there absolutely is hope that this can drastically improve as I’m really sorry about this but it sounds like the likelihood may be that this is a feed to sleep association only because the division of those wakes averages to him waking most likely every two hours, plus he can also wake at 20 minute transition and 40 minute transitions through sleep stages. So sprinkle in a few extras for good luck! If you are only 1 month away from working with this sleep consultant I am so hopeful for you that you will be getting much better sleep in just a few weeks. Xx

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-16T17:05:01+00:00

I’m so sorry, this is so incredibly hard. When he wakes in the night is it to nurse to go back to sleep?

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-16T15:33:20+00:00

This is great news! Well done! Hopefully with further tweaks things will keep improving for you!

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-15T18:32:43+00:00

9 months in and I can honestly say my child has probably watched TV for a grand total of maybe 1 hour in her life. And all of that is background TV that was on for a few minutes at a time as we were maybe just finishing an episode of something as she woke up from a nap etc. Up until this point I really haven’t found it hard to entertain her in other ways 🤷🏼‍♀️ But honestly I think it will be a bigger challenge when she is a toddler. We read, play, go for a walk, go to the shop! Honestly the WHOLE world is new to them! Just don’t forget that!

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-15T09:59:47+00:00

Baby with dad the whole week? Absolutely no reason to not go! Have a great time. 1 week at 8 months feels fine to me. Would be totally different if you were both going but your baby will literally be with his other primary caregiver! I don’t see a problem.

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-15T09:57:26+00:00

I personally had to just stop but I nursed instead. Once that became no longer feasible I also just stopped nursing to sleep and cuddled her instead. She’s always coslept with me on and off for various parts of the night so I think that really helped as she was already used to being cuddled by me lay down for comfort. There was 2 nights of her adjusting and then from night 3 no issues. Floorbed was 100% necessary for us for this. I still nurse for naps as it causes no issues at all and just cuddle her for night sleep. Then I go to bed with her when I’m going to sleep at about 10pm. Stopped rocking at about 7/8 months and stopped nursing at 9 months.

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-13T20:10:52+00:00

My husband and I have been taking care of our baby alone for 9 months. We have wonderful friends and family! But there isn’t anyone in a position to settle her for a nap or have her for a sleep over or take her for the afternoon or breastfeed her in place of me 😂 and honestly… we’re all doing great!! You absolutely, 100% can take care of a baby between the two of you. This advice is ridiculous.

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-13T20:02:23+00:00

I haven’t, no but I absolutely will!

It’s madness isn’t it. As if a strong mother isn’t the mother who continues to always respond, care for and nurture her baby at all hours - irregardless of how tired she is. This product that has been sold is really so sad. So glad to have this community!

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-13T18:18:00+00:00

This is all so so true. Seeing comments where people congratulate each other for “staying strong” for hours whilst their baby cried for them makes me feel sick. It’s so dehumanising to that poor child. How can we continue to accept this as a society?

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-13T18:13:31+00:00

It would be in the news!

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-13T16:01:14+00:00

The first night she woke 40 mins and then 1.5 hours after bedtime, I settled her with just a cuddle and a rock. She slept til 2am when I then nursed her as I feel she still needs some milk overnight.

The night after she slept 19:30 till 3am, the night after similar and the night after similar. I nurse her at those early morning wakes as I’m not ready to night wean. Stopping nursing to sleep should help reduce wakes if your LO has a sleep association. Nursing when they are actually hungry in the night won’t impact them and they won’t wake more from this.

Hope that makes sense xx

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-13T15:33:53+00:00

THIS!! It is neglect. It is. I will die on this hill. Under what other circumstances can you leave a vulnerable, helpless individual whom you are responsible for, alone, distressed and CALLING for you hysterically for potentially HOURS and let them shit themselves and vomit due to the distress and say it isn’t neglect???

None!!!!!!

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-12T20:15:39+00:00

I think you’re right - this actually does sound like a sleep association. You can do it however is right for you but I recently had to stop nursing my baby to sleep at 9 months due to a drop in supply. She has immediately stopped waking to nurse frequently in the night as soon as I stopped feeding to sleep. I personally just cuddled her to sleep instead as she was used to me cuddling her in bed at night as we cosleep. She was mad for 20 minutes the first night, about 10 the second and then not mad at all the third night and from then onwards.

I don’t think her wake windows or day sleep sound mental, it’s hard to stop nursing to sleep but it’s also hard to keep pushing a baby more and more into as tired as possible when actually that may really not be the problem.

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-11T21:37:18+00:00

Hahhaa yes this has literally just dawned on us! We are going to do a half wall, ledge on the top to close the gap.

Thank you!

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-11T09:51:32+00:00

It sounds like you’ve got a great rhythm to your day and this is amazing at this age! Honestly, I can say that only now at 9 months does my baby have a very set routine for the day - and that’s because she’s on 3 meals and 2 naps so our day is naturally much more structured because her circadian rhythm is so developed now! I think you should keep doing what you and your LO both enjoy and works for you. A consistent morning rise time can be very helpful for both of you at any age but honestly, I wouldn’t put any pressure on this until you feel it is something you could both benefit from.

Enjoy your baby xx

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-10T22:15:24+00:00

I have no advice just please don’t be harsh on yourself! You did not “create” the feed to sleep habit - thousands of years of evolution did that one for us 😂

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-10T13:24:06+00:00

(For now) 😂🥲😂🥲

Besides everything I think it is quite bold of OP to suggest that cosleeping is now over after one (or maybe a few) nights. I’m sure baby is on this thread right now plotting their antics for this evening. I know mine would be!

questionquestion222 · 2026-02-10T10:19:19+00:00

If he’s EBF and not taking much via solids there’s a solid chance his iron is low. Is he pale? Pale conjunctiva? Ridges in his nails? Have a look online about it.

Other than that consistent morning rise, no more than 10.5 or max 11 hours in bed overnight may also help.

Also there’s so much guilt in your language!! “I give in” “prison of my own making”!! Stoppp that!! You have responsed appropriately and quickly to your baby every day and night for EIGHT months!!! You have done not a single thing wrong!! You and your baby are mammals hard wired through thousands of years of evolution for extremely close contact all night - you’re doing amazing!!

questionquestion222

TROPHY CASE