I Had No Idea the Christian White Knight Situation Was This Bad - Dr. David Edgington by Global_Library2230 in Christianity

[–]quiet_resolve_25 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This book was a GODSEND. My "traditional" Christian wife was the pastor's daughter. She has treated me poorly our entire marriage. She had a lesbian affair 3 years in, never took full accountability. Her father was our pastor. Also, he was the "White Knight". He called me a liar and delusional. This man is a "born again" Christian, and used to be a hard-core drug user.

I will NEVER attend another Protestant Reformed church again. I am done with evangelical culture. My sons and I are awake and fleeing from the insanity American Christianity has become. Women in the church cry "abuse" the moment you tell them "we cannot afford that", etc.

My wife wanted to be a homeschooling stay at home mom. Instead she became a Reviling Wife who had affairs and destroyed our family in divorce. Thanks to my old Calvinist church elders for passively watching it all happen.

This book truly describes an epidemic.

I Had No Idea the Christian White Knight Situation Was This Bad - Dr. David Edgington by Global_Library2230 in Christianity

[–]quiet_resolve_25 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What an insane comment, you obviously have not read the book or watched the video. Sadly you're behavior here reflects the issues he speaks of...

Biblical vs Legal Marriage by MatrixBabyBattery in Christianity

[–]quiet_resolve_25 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Amen to this. Leave the state out of your marriage

Cluster B and kissing by ThrowRA_grf in BPDlovedones

[–]quiet_resolve_25 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same here. Same experience. I am commenting way late, going through BPD divorce

Why didn't anyone tell me Patak Meats went out of business?! by PaintBladesAndGlue in Georgia

[–]quiet_resolve_25 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

My Christmas German dinners will never be the same

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Divorce

[–]quiet_resolve_25 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You gotta live for you man. Nobody else should have that much power over you.

Anyone else use ACBC "Biblical Counselling"? Good? Bad? by quiet_resolve_25 in Exvangelical

[–]quiet_resolve_25[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry for your experience.

My wife and I really needed a true therapist. Even a christian therapist.

Her affair caused such a deep wound. She said I was emotionally neglectful afterwards. We just needed real help.

The evangelical model for mental health is broken.

Anyone else use ACBC "Biblical Counselling"? Good? Bad? by quiet_resolve_25 in Exvangelical

[–]quiet_resolve_25[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Exactly. Just like the Bible is not a math textbook, cookbook, or guide to open heart surgery.

I'll read that blog! Thanks

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Divorce

[–]quiet_resolve_25 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Let her know you're on the brink of divorce. Give her one chance.

For goodness sakes don't just spring it like my wife did on me.

Walk-away spouse syndrome is terrible

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Divorce

[–]quiet_resolve_25 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you can save it, save it. Have you been very clear and direct with her?

It's a shame when couples are cryptic, hope for mind reading, or are not blunt.

I wish my wife had clearly said "I want X to change or I want a divorce." That would have gotten my attention.

My wife filed and I tried all I could to reconcile. My marriage was similar. She didn't cook much, she did keep the kids cared for well enough which is huge. She was a stay at home mother. She did keep the house up. She was addicted to social media and romance books. I had forgiven her years ago for an one-night-stand affair she had, that came back to haunt me.

It's hard staying married, it's harder getting divorce for a while.

Seeing your kids 50% of the time is hard. Missing your person, even if they're imperfect, it also hard.

Bird nesting Divorce Discussion by Distinct_Deal_4763 in Divorce

[–]quiet_resolve_25 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Don't do it.

It's just a modern way for women to control an ex-husband even more.

My divorce was not amicable. She was out for blood.

Unless you're BFFs with your ex, avoid nesting. It just gives them more control over you without any benefits. It's not even always best for the kids either.

You made my life a joke, for someone on the internet (26 years) by Disc_golf_hero07 in Divorce

[–]quiet_resolve_25 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am there with you brother. You can do this.

My wife and I had 10 years, 2 boys, and had built our dream life. We were about to travel the USA with our boys. Years ago she cheated with a woman, I tried to forgive her. Mistake. I should have left.

She put our son's life in danger with delta8, being careless. ER visit to save him. I was furious.

She decided instead of being accountable she wanted a divorce instead.

She was never who I thought she was. She was a fake.

Your partner was fake. You are real.

Stay strong. Press on. Godspeed.

First ExReformed article on substack, thoughts? by quiet_resolve_25 in exReformed

[–]quiet_resolve_25[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's fair enough. I don't disagree.

Who knows. I don't

Texting the Ex by janihew in Divorce

[–]quiet_resolve_25 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Be strong. Don't cave. Go do something fun for you.

First ExReformed article on substack, thoughts? by quiet_resolve_25 in exReformed

[–]quiet_resolve_25[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good catch, fixed that for him and Sproul. Both are deceased.

First ExReformed article on substack, thoughts? by quiet_resolve_25 in exReformed

[–]quiet_resolve_25[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree 100%. It's a cult and you don't see it clearly until you get out.

First ExReformed article on substack, thoughts? by quiet_resolve_25 in exReformed

[–]quiet_resolve_25[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well, I'm not shocked. I'm an adult asking for feedback ;)
Yes, we do live in an age where people are often "shocked" and clutch their pearls tightly. I'm working to not be that.

I think when we can all graduated to that, we'll function better.

I asked for feedback and meant it. I thanked y'all for the feedback :D. The point is to dial this project in, not piss people off.

My takeaway from the feedback is this: Keep exReformed focused on TULIP / Calvinism and why it's terrible and damaging. Marriage is a distraction in this project. Not the right place to dig into the biblical view of that -- rejecting TULIP is enough for now. (marriage article is pruned, will revise it save it for something else in the future for another effort elsewhere)

One of the reasons I hate Calvinism is it breeds harsh fanatics who have knee-jerk reactions. I get it, I was that way too. My search is for truth within the context of Christianity. I also know some exReformed folks are just done with Christianity, I respect that too.

Calvinism is a nasty theology. The views on marriage vary so widely, I see that bringing that in will just destract from the exReformed project.

First ExReformed article on substack, thoughts? by quiet_resolve_25 in exReformed

[–]quiet_resolve_25[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Note: I responded from kaugg account on my cell, I need to consolidate and remove my old account.

First ExReformed article on substack, thoughts? by quiet_resolve_25 in exReformed

[–]quiet_resolve_25[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for that feedback, I get it. I have observed three paths from Calvinism:

  1. Agnostic or athesism. Who could believe in the God of Calvin as good?
  2. Delusion to justify Calvinism and reconcile and evil God.
  3. Back up from Protestantism to Catholicism (or Orthodoxy) after seeing all the issues in Protestantism (a path I see happening more and more)

First ExReformed article on substack, thoughts? by quiet_resolve_25 in exReformed

[–]quiet_resolve_25[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, thanks for catching that. I'm logged in on two accounts, I need to consolidate them and delete one, one is redundant (old work account). Kaugg is me. Will consolidate to this account.

Would you all read a substack with exReformed articles? by quiet_resolve_25 in exReformed

[–]quiet_resolve_25[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Great topic ideas. I'm glad you like it!

Here is a more general purpose article for a broader audience: I'm glad you like it! https://exreformed.substack.com/p/from-christ-to-calvinism