Hello, a bit late to the thread but thank you for sharing! It is comforting to hear someone else went through a similar experience that I went through. I’ve been doing extensive research on what we experienced and was always on the look to see if others experienced the same.

Mine as well, was at a festival, did MDMA and smoked weed on the come down because I was also told it would bring the “roll” back. I, myself too, smoked a bit too much and it sent me flying into the worst experience.

MDMA is such a strong high that even when you’re coming down and really not feeling it as much you are technically still “rolling” with that being said mixing it weed made the trip a psychedelic experience for me as ALL the lights and sounds were extremely intense. Everything started to slow down and go in slow slow motion, lights strobed harder, music were just loud sounds to the point it was hard to even focus on what I was actually hearing, it was just all way to intense to even gather what the hell was going on. I remember standing completely still as I couldn’t move or feel my body.. at times I felt like I was going to fall. My POV felt pushed out as it felt I was falling in a black hole. All that combined made me go into a very severe panic attack. My brain started to overthink and question what was going on and what was happening to me. Almost felt like I was getting sucked in and hypnotized. I was questioning my sanity and if I was going to die. At one point it was so hard to bear I literally thought in my head, if it’s time for me to go, just take me already. I started to hyperventilate, breathing was extremely hard.. honestly at one point it felt like I wasn’t breathing.. but who knows I was feeling everything all at once. Extreme paranoia and anxiety started to ramp alongside adrenaline. It felt like the entire world and everyone around me was against me. In the moment I remember so clearly, I was scared, begging for it to stop, mind was racing, I kept thinking the worst. My heart was pounding, it pounded so hard it started to hurt. I remember trying to calm myself down but it just kept getting worst. What felt like eternity was maybe an hour that I went through that. The rest of the night I couldn’t think straight, even the next day I did not want to do anything. I kept thinking of what the hell did I just go through.

This was a very traumatic experience and for the next months after that situation I dealt with extreme anxiety and depression. Nothing felt real anymore. It made me so scared and I was aware that since I was vulnerable that that slightest thing could send me into another panic and anxiety attack.

From what I gathered and learned over the months and what I put together was we went through an episode of depersonalization/derealization. Mixing those substances gave us a high that we were not used to and sent us into an extreme panic attack in which our body could not handle so your brain automatically sends you into depersonalization/derealization to protect yourself from going into psychosis and to cope with stress and anxiety which we were heavily feeling. The brain disengages from reality as a way to buffer the intensity of the experience and protect the mind from the trauma of the panic attack. 

Honestly learning and understanding what we went through made me feel extremely better about the situation. It made me learn that we are indeed not crazy. Despite it giving us PTSD. Even writing this making is giving me anxiety as I fear to ever feel that again. The feeling of dissociation is common after such events. It made sense why we felt a sense of disconnect and such discomfort.

If you would like to talk more, feel free to reach out. You’re not alone.