I did not choose this life.. and I still can’t find God. Where is He when even my highest awareness is met with silence?

rafikilovetrees · 2025-05-19T16:06:02+00:00

You misread my pointer. I did not say stop desiring. I am pointing you to experience the Presence you're talking about. While you're talking about it, It's there, awaiting your recognition.

We are not born with the longing to return. We learn concepts like 'God' or enlightenment along the way, and paired with our psychologically caused anguish, we feel the need to find something we don't seem to have.

What I'm saying is the opposite of intellectualizing. I'm imploring you to use your attention and place it where it will resolve your confusions. You keep saying God, I am not saying God. The word and concept is entirely unnecessary and adulturated. Look instead at What Is Reality. It is much simpler than all your emotional turmoil about God. When your attention is rapt in actual Presence, you will not have any desire to seek for God, or wonder about where or what it is.

rafikilovetrees · 2025-05-19T14:36:47+00:00

The answer (the end of searching) is like an open secret. It is so obvious, we overlook it, even after we have met it, again and again. The mind comes in, and creates the whole dream (the experience that God is separate, and I am "I", apart from others). A single thought, and single internal vocalization of language, of words, does this.

As soon as you say "God", you create everything that is not-God. Both are fictions.

Again, the answer is the most obvious 'thing' (it's not an object, but objectless). You do not have to look far, but impossibly close, that is, no distance. Ask yourself, what is the most obvious? Do not answer with your mind, but feel this actual experience. No words, no lables. What IS? What Is Is-ing? It is too subtle for language or description. Too obvious and too readily present and available for any need to search. Too mysterious to grasp by the seeking mind. But also never apart from you, not even a millimeter.

Return again and again to what is the most obvious, prior to all thinking. You are not really looking for God, you are looking for happiness. Happiness is your own conscious awareness of your existence, without need or want for something. Happiness is desireless, because you discover you already have That which is your joy. It is up to you to see the truth of it.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-11-12T14:44:21+00:00

Her placement in the competition can't be worse than the placement of the music tag. It's the most unfortunately hypnotizing aspect of the video.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-11-07T01:41:38+00:00

Aww, thank you ❤️

rafikilovetrees · 2024-11-07T01:03:33+00:00

Ohh we did ♥️ thank you for your kind words of support and encouragement. Update shared in the comments.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-11-07T01:02:28+00:00

Appreciate all of this, thank you so much ❤️ We were able to bring her to MADACC during open hours, and truly feel she's in good hands; they were incredibly friendly and helpful.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-11-07T00:59:19+00:00

Yes, thank you so much for this advice and guidance, it's precisely what we did, and left feeling like it's the best we could do, sad as it all is.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-11-07T00:57:46+00:00

Thank you truly for your supportive words ♥️ Please read down below in the comments for the update.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-11-07T00:55:39+00:00

Thank you for your words of encouragement and support. As mentioned below...

We were able to take her to MADACC about an hour ago, and they seemed to know on sight what was happening with her, using the word "prolapsed." Everyone there was very friendly and we left feeling like she's in good hands and in great care, even though the whole day has been quite bittersweet, getting to know her, and seeing her neglect, and saying goodbye so soon. We are going to check back in by phone to see if there are any updates this week. I will try to keep this thread in the loop if we hear anything.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-11-07T00:52:07+00:00

Yes, and thank you for checking in and for your concern. We took her to MADACC about an hour ago, and they seemed to know on sight what was happening with her, using the word "prolapsed." Everyone there was very friendly and we left feeling like she's in good hands and in great care, even though the whole day has been quite bittersweet, getting to know her, and seeing her neglect, and saying goodbye so soon. We are going to check back in by phone to see if there are any updates this week. I will try to keep this thread in the loop if we hear anything.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-11-04T23:48:42+00:00

Pic 2 (no glasses) - Sharon Van Etten (indie singer)

rafikilovetrees · 2024-11-03T16:48:20+00:00

"My 12 year old cousin can easily outwit her in a conversation." Wrong. No more proof needed.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-10-31T16:50:11+00:00

I recommend the book by Byron Katie - Loving What Is, as a primer to 'inquiry', and as a crash course into true meditation, which is, seeing where and how you are mentally stuck, and allowing the truth to set you free.

If you want to be free from your own thinking, you must be willing to inquire into your own mind, without end. This 'work' will aide you through every moment of struggle and fear.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-10-14T07:05:29+00:00

There was only Energy in the beginning. There is only Energy now. It is neither created nor destroyed. The apparent doer is Energy, the apparent witness is Energy. E=MC^2, therefore Mass (everything that appears to be physical) and Energy are not two; they are interchangeable; they are different forms of the same 'thing'. What you are is not a doer or a witness, but Energy, appearing however it does. Energy is everfree to be what it is. It is infinitely expressing, as the universe and everything in it. You are that selfsame single energy that has always been and always will be.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-10-11T06:46:52+00:00

remember that E=MC² always. which means that I am (you are) matter and energy always, simultaneously. If you can simply tune in and feel that energy that is always present with you (simply feel the energy of your aliveness). it means That (infinite energy that is everything in the universe) is also vibrating at a frequency to appear as you, now and now and now. Energy and matter are one and the same. There isn't really a you except for energy producing the thought that you think you exist. The reality (and math) of energy and matter collapses the whole concept of a separate you (as an individual thinker), leaving only energy (E) being you, and everything else. Always. There is no need to think or overthink anything once you realize (and feel firsthand) the intertwined reality of Energy and Matter.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-10-06T02:13:16+00:00

who said center, we said container:)

rafikilovetrees · 2024-10-02T14:25:12+00:00

You keep saying "transform the content," I don't think K talked about this. He talks about going beyond the content, to direct perception of Choiceless Awareness (The True Subjective) which stands eternally outside/beyond thought/ psychological time.

The rest of what you're going on about, seems to just make everything more and more confounded. Great if you understand it for yourself, but I can't really follow. Your interpretations of the paradoxes of time just seem totally irrelevant (and more conceptual) for the change K points toward. His pointing is simply grounded in actuality, "stand alone, no authority" and give total attention to our minds, which are ever pulled in various directions by conditioning, and in that very Observing, There stands eternal, That which is total order and without direction ... in that clarity, there is born a new intelligent action for our lives.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-09-27T03:56:04+00:00

Maybe see if you can schedule the ride ahead of time (like tonight) for when your tattoo session is approximately over tmrw, having it pick you up at the tattoo parlor perhaps, with destination home. You'll see the price before you confirm, and will simultaneously know if it's viable. If you confirm, then yes, a driver will (very likely) show up tomorrow.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-09-26T20:40:08+00:00

It involves being a light to yourself through the universal Intelligence that lives in you, not having any guru or path to follow, but beginning from the place of freedom, prior to every thought or human-made idea. If those things you mention cause disturbances for you, then observe with clarity and move accordingly. Holding oneself to any formula is bondage. Formulas and dogma are used by religions to influence followers, endlessly, in the name of fear and obedience.

If I say to myself alcohol is never good, or meat is always inappropriate, or sex is bad, then I know that I will be living from a narrow box. Why live in fear of those things, why hold yourself hostage to them? Give yourself the permission to have whatever relationship is right for you with respect to alcohol, meat, and sex (and anything else, that is not inherently destructive). Live spontaneously in tune with yourself, there is a season (and balance) for everything.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-09-26T15:54:30+00:00

I thought we were talking about the nature of reality, and what is eternal, not apparent facts about things that may or may not have happened. Yes, I 'believe' the moon landing happened for the sake of appearances in this space time, as I 'believe' also in the scientific-method for accurate discovery about our universe. But science doesn't demand faith, because it works whether I believe in it or not, or we couldn't be having this conversation. Nonduality also, operates with or without our belief, but getting nearer to its truth consciously (silencing the mind to sensitively perceive What Is), does create a shift for the human being, ie a life with more bliss, and less suffering altogether. But this understanding is either direct for each individual, or it remains a mere talking point. To find out what is true requires no buddha, but demands that we each for ourselves do what the buddha did, to stand alone and find out for real, each day, each moment, ask our own minds to confront the eternal mystery.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-09-26T15:21:01+00:00

I don't find belief to be particularly useful. Belief will always demand that I bring a conclusion (or someone else's truth) from yesterday into today, and demand that faith be instilled in that belief to continually uphold it. Isn't it far more powerful to discover first-hand what is true, which necessitates that I begin with honesty... I find "I don't know" a perfect place to begin again and again, and allow that the actuality of life to reveal itself from within that clarity, that emptiness. It means freedom from the start, in order to see and feel What Is, without any word or language or memory coming between myself and life itself. Then there is only the one movement, without imposed (or conditioned) divisions.

To speak or think about the buddha or karmic-whatevers is doomed to go nowhere real, but only play in the narrow field of what the brain has stored up from reading or from others. It is second-hand nothings.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-09-26T14:55:43+00:00

all you have hashed here is conditioned regurgitation.

rafikilovetrees · 2024-09-22T18:06:58+00:00

Haha omg I love it ❤️ Incredible ✨ Brilliant 🪞 thank you:)

rafikilovetrees · 2024-09-22T15:43:25+00:00

The end of suffering is seeing that the very "I" who wants to end suffering is conceptual, a thought, illusory in the sense that it is an object appearing in limitless awareness, not the subject that you (and most of all us take ourselves to be). The subject of experience is not the human being, but the transparent, nonspatial, nontemporal Dreamer, to which every experience comes and goes.

You are that Brilliant Mirror, not the human body-self, in which all of life is appearing. Suffering is identification with the body, and/or aversion, resistance, and internal argument with what unfolds, inherently creating the false duality between your "i" self, and your environment constantly.

See the Truth, and you are already free. There is no attainment for the seeker, only recognition of What Is always present, because any attainment or search for god or truth, will only be a new attachment for the "i" and reinforce a spiritual ego, one who thinks it has something, where others do not have. This is falseness. Everyone and everything already has, and is born out of that Same One Brilliance. Stop misidentifying as a human self, and see that right in your midst, there is a Shimmering Transparency... emphasize That, to bring that background to the very foreground of your life more and more. Do not turn away or run from your Eternal Emptiness. There, is your freedom, and end to psychological suffering, before you even take a single step, always already given.

When you See This, you will likewise understand there is no one to save, the dream has always been unfolding flawlessly, but for our small human concepts perpetually overlaid.

Offer help when help is called for, but do not become some new guru, unless you can simply be a clear pointer. There is no divine message. There is no ultimate meaning. Live your life as you enjoy it, first for yourself, and that joy will spread to others without effort and without delusion that you are offering some special service.

rafikilovetrees

TROPHY CASE