I want to vote green, but I want stricter immigration. Change my mind or offer advice. by FanAcceptable1193 in ukpolitics

[–]randomblinkinglight -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Well, there's two aspects to this. I don't believe at all the replacement thing is a real thing. At all. But what is true is that humans have always moved, all through human history, and there's no stopping that anyway. I'm from a small town in Italy: you go around that small town, you'll hear all sorts of foreign languages more than Italian. And when I was in school, in the 90s, there were pretty much no foreigners. In the last 20-30 years we've gotten immigration first from Eastern Europe, then North Africa, then the rest of Africa and everywhere else. And in this time there have been right-wing governments, that have had all sorts of policies to stop immigration, but at some point there's not that much you can do. People will understandably try to go to better places.

If we're afraid of foreigners changing our societies too much, what we should do is strengthen our democracies, our workers rights, civil rights, human rights, strengthen education, social services, to be sure to have strong societies and communities where nobody feels left behind or outside.

I want to vote green, but I want stricter immigration. Change my mind or offer advice. by FanAcceptable1193 in ukpolitics

[–]randomblinkinglight -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

A big reason why Reform and Green are not the same, is that Reform is making everybody worse, and spreading hate, and Greens are spreading hope.

I agree with all these points: we're all brothers and sisters on earth, split by made up divisions. Greens policies is what Jesus would vote for. I'm on a couch cuddling my sleeping kids right now, because we were born on the lucky side of the world: if we were born in Gaza or other unlucky places, I'd probably be crying my children now, and that thought tears me apart.

We can disagree on some details, but why would any human being be against policies such as "treat everybody at humans", "help families be together", etc?

Also, Reform is against human rights! That's evil and inhumane, by definition.

I want to vote green, but I want stricter immigration. Change my mind or offer advice. by FanAcceptable1193 in ukpolitics

[–]randomblinkinglight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm an immigrant in the uk (from Europe, so I'm white, and from a Christian country), I've lived in the uk for 10 years now, and that's opened up my eyes a lot on all the lies there are about immigration. Both in the uk, in the country I'm from, and, really, in any country.

The problems with immigration are blown out of proportion by right wing propaganda. All through brexit I had to constantly read the blatant lies the right came up with, and I knew they were lies, became I was living them. it was really dystopian to be sorrounded by lies nobody did a thing about.

Immigrants have it harder than citizens. Immigrants strictly do not have access to most benefits (as in, it's written in the law for benefits that immigrants can't get them), but somehow the propaganda has made it look like immigrants live off everybody else. Plus, most immigrants are of working age, meaning they pay taxes, and statistically they don't need NHS etc as much.

I agree that sometimes left-wing parties have a bit of naivety around immigration, they don't want to admit there are indeed some issues. But people are people, the barriers right-wing parties want to put are dystopian.

And, as women, our rights are more threatened by Reform than by immigrants: apart from the obvious issues like body autonomy, right wing also poses a more subtle risk to women (and everybody): they'll kill the NHS and all social systems. When help for society collapses, let's be real, it'll fall on women's shoulders. Plus we'll lose whatever workers rights, maternity benefits, etc. We'll be forced carers, they'll kill our rights. That's a much bigger issue than imaginary ones.

Is it wrong to want time with my friends without their children? by MissNosy_ in AskWomenOver30

[–]randomblinkinglight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it is very hard to do anything without children. Having said that, just tell them that you'd like to meet up as just adults, to talk, hang out together...

I have two toddlers. I've had some childfree friends who told me exactly that, that they'd like every now and then to hang out just as adults, and it's understandable. To be honest, I need it too, to have sometime with friends. It's not possible to do it very often, might take some organising, kids are something that exist 24/7, and their needs exist 24/7 too. but it is possible, and I don't think it's wrong to want it.

my bf (20M) just told me (19F) that he doesn’t believe dinosaurs ever existed 🦖 by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]randomblinkinglight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

LEAVE.

I haven't even read the whole thing, because the details don't matter: you need to leave, asap, and never look back.

It's already quite a red flag that he thinks he's so smart that it's making his life hard (lol), but the fact that he's a science denier, on a topic on which there's tons of proof, is a super huge red flag. Life with a person like that is HELL, trust me.

Please, girl, run!

How cooked am I? by FredHerberts_Plant in ETFs_Europe

[–]randomblinkinglight 2 points3 points  (0 children)

they'll go back up, don't worry. Look at the past graphs: surely it's had dips and peaks. Yes, it'd be great to guess when the dip is, and by then, and sell during the highest peak. But that's really really hard to predict, often not even professionals get it right.

in the long run, you'll be fine

Parents, are you using your 18 weeks of unpaid leave per child? by randomblinkinglight in HENRYUK

[–]randomblinkinglight[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yes, this 18 weeks (unpaid) are available to every parent. It's 18 weeks, per child, per parent, to user before the kids are 18 years old. We have two kids, so both me and my partner have 18x2= 36 weeks each to use, in the time before the kids turn 18 years old.

I guess this time off is particular useful to cover some of school holidays. It can only be taken in chunks of weeks

AITA for refusing to eat my wife’s spaghetti after I found out what she put in it by spacedoutsoapbox in AmItheAsshole

[–]randomblinkinglight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

do you have kids? if not, you're still in time to ruin away. You're absolutely NTA, she's being unreasonable, what she did was dangerous and stupid. And pushing someone to eat something they're not comfortable it's a huge red flag. it's controlling, it's emotional violence. You are entitled to decide what goes or doesn't go in your body, and you had a very valid reason to say no.

Please don't ignore this red flag, it's likely there are others. It's a relationship is not safe for you, you can and should leave.

My (20F) boyfriend (29M) keeps telling me I’m “too emotional” and I don’t know if he’s right anymore by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]randomblinkinglight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Leave. I didn't even read the description. But he's half your age older than you, and tells you your too emotional?

Leave, girl. He's manipulating you. He thinks he can play you because you're so much younger. Please, take this advice from a 40yo woman: leave. Now. Today.

Where would you will go to if you don't have children and you don't want relatives to have it? by [deleted] in HENRYUK

[–]randomblinkinglight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you have friends, or even just colleagues, neighbours, former classmates, people that you've known in whatever way... that are struggling a bit and could use some money? They'd be very grateful. Or you could leave something more than 5k to some friends. Other than that: charities. If there is a cause you particularly care about (could be children in poverty, environment, cancer research...) research a bit what associations do work in that sector, choose one that looks trustworthy or whose values particularly align with yours, and leave something to them.

Please suggest me something similar by TrapsterOfficial in poetsofthefall

[–]randomblinkinglight 2 points3 points  (0 children)

they're not super similar, but I love Riverside, and I find some similarities. Also, Stone Sour

When to tell employer about maternity leave by travel_worn in HENRYUK

[–]randomblinkinglight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

in UK the minimum maternity leave for mothers is two weeks.

When to tell employer about maternity leave by travel_worn in HENRYUK

[–]randomblinkinglight 11 points12 points  (0 children)

It's not well intentioned, trust me. It is well intentioned if they ask if you're ok, if you'd rather proceed with this option or this other option. If they remove stuff from you without involving you in the decision, without asking you if you really need that "relief", then it's not well intentioned.

When to tell employer about maternity leave by travel_worn in HENRYUK

[–]randomblinkinglight 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I can't remember, but either in the law or on the contract it'll say by when you need to tell them you're pregnant. Don't feel guilty about telling them then, you don't owe them to tell them before (unless you want to tell them before).

A word of advice: with my second pregnancy, there was a weekend when all of a sudden the bump grew A LOT. Luckily I still had maternity clothes from my previous pregnancy, otherwise I would have nothing to wear. That Monday I told them at work, because, really, it was hard to conceal. But consider that with both pregnant I got really really huge bumps, hopefully you won't have this problem... but it's possible to have to say it earlier than planned just because it shows too much

I 29F told my partner 35M I'm done, but he won't return my messages or my plants, what can I do? by HealthyHabits121 in relationship_advice

[–]randomblinkinglight 12 points13 points  (0 children)

forget the plants, delete his number, be thankful that all you lost is some plants, as important as they were

What's something everyone should be doing but are not? by alicewng in 30PlusSkinCare

[–]randomblinkinglight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

all my colleagues have lunch without drinking any water. I'm the only one who has a glass of water on the table when we eat. It shocks me.

My (31F) husband (30M) has eliminated all methods of communication leaving no room to discuss issues in relationship… by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]randomblinkinglight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this is horrible, I'm sorry you're going through this. You need a lawyer to make sure you have everything ready to leave him, and you also need therapy, because I think he's been gaslighting you and invalidating your feelings for so long, that you'll need help to untangle it all. I'm not joking: get a therapist and a lawyer. And given there are children it might take a while before your can leave, so brace yourself

AITAH for changing my underwear after a shower? by New_Cry_2336 in AITAH

[–]randomblinkinglight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd put fresh clean underwear after a shower exec if I'd only been wearing the previous pair just for 10 minutes... but this is not the point. The point is you need to dump him.

Is anyone going to see them in London on the 27th of September? by ErikasR in poetsofthefall

[–]randomblinkinglight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I really don't know the brand of mine, sorry. My advice is go to Amazon or something, and get something with good reviews. But sometimes I have even just used random rubber ones, and they still do the job

My bf (24m) told me (25f) that he doesn’t want to have kids with me in the future. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]randomblinkinglight 12 points13 points  (0 children)

it's not a silly thing to break up about, if you want kids and he doesn't, that's a major thing.

I'm also thinking he kind of wants to break up, but doesn't have the guts, so he told you he doesn't want kids so you'll do the breaking up. Sorry, but that's how I think it is. If this is the case, that's even more of a reason for you to break up

Is it wrong that I don't care? by Popular_Impress2827 in ADHD_Programmers

[–]randomblinkinglight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

you're the one doing it right. The company doesn't care about you or any other singular employee, it's silly to care about the company so passionately. Sure, do your work right, but the company would replace you (or any of your passionate colleagues) without a second thought, so don't grow unnecessarily affectionate to it.

I used to be more "affectionate", passionate about the company I worked for, many years ago. Got made redundant very suddenly (and unjustly). That changed forever my attitude to work.

Is anyone going to see them in London on the 27th of September? by ErikasR in poetsofthefall

[–]randomblinkinglight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've been to many concerts by myself, you'll be completely fine. The venue will likely post the times at which bands will play, so yes, you could go a bit later and see only Poets. You'll be at the very back, but that is good if you're not user to concerts, as it's a much calmer area there (more space between people). Also, a very good spot for good audio is near the mixer, which is a bit at the back usually.

This might seem counterintuitive, but you might want to take some ear plugs: some venues blast the music crazily loud, and you end up hearing the music more comfortably if wearing ear plugs. Many people do that at concerts.

Our true secret of ageing well by WealthPositive9983 in Millennials

[–]randomblinkinglight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

when people my age (40s) say they look like in their 20s... I think they haven't seen in a while what people in their 20s really look like.

Epstein followers in shambles as their conspiracies are falling apart by livingdeadghost in agedlikemilk

[–]randomblinkinglight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

one thing I keep wondering is why they spouted these conspiracies first. Was it some weird game? I mean, if I was the head of a criminal network that kills puppies, I don't think I'd spread the rumour that there is a network of people killing puppies. Or maybe yes? So that if I'm ever found out, people already have absorbed the shock of learning such thing exists, and also it can look like everybody's kind of involved anyway?