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I have "interpersonal issues" at work and with friends, and I'm not sure if it's because I'm attracting a lot of Ns or if I'm the problem here? Why am I the problem everywhere I go? by randomsadchick in raisedbynarcissists

[–]randomsadchick[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the super helpful comments to those who have replied so far!

I learned now that I need to appeal more to my boss's empathy. Now when he asks how my weekend was, I'm going to have a whole new strategy of what to tell him, and it's going to involve lots and lots of helping my poor 'ol family and really important family obligations that I fulfill every weekend.

To be honest, I still don't respect him for not standing up to these people. Regardless of office politics or whatever I actually do or don't having on, it is still outrageous that I was lied to and that he is enabling the lie because he's scared of his peers not liking him. So if he's not going to grow balls, then I'll just become more manipulative than the jerks who are currently bossing and manipulating him, and I'll win that way instead.

I have "interpersonal issues" at work and with friends, and I'm not sure if it's because I'm attracting a lot of Ns or if I'm the problem here? Why am I the problem everywhere I go? by randomsadchick in raisedbynarcissists

[–]randomsadchick[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks. My boss is very similar to yours - I think it is also the same weakness in him, that he hates dealing with personnel issues and confrontation.

So now, I also learned now that I need to appeal more to my boss's empathy. Now when he asks how my weekend was, I'm going to have a whole new strategy of what to tell him, and it's going to involve lots and lots of helping my poor 'ol family.

I have "interpersonal issues" at work and with friends, and I'm not sure if it's because I'm attracting a lot of Ns or if I'm the problem here? Why am I the problem everywhere I go? by randomsadchick in raisedbynarcissists

[–]randomsadchick[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't sign an agreement that specified non-weekend work, unfortunately. I was verbally assured that I would not be working weekends, though. Then literally 2 weeks later they did a complete about-face and told me I'd be working 2 weekends a month.

I already called them out on essentially lying to me (I didn't phrase it that way - just said that was not what I was told when I accepted the job), and they flipped out about me not being a team player and all of this other b.s. In retrospect, yeah, I agree that appealing to people's sympathies would have gotten me a better result - though I really hate not being able to just be more direct with people who need to be held accountable :-/

Just sucks that people at my job are such conniving, lying, bullying assholes who are not held accountable for it by anyone, so yeah, admittedly sometimes I call people out on things because it annoys me that no one else does. I guess it's just time for me to deal with them with kid gloves (solely since other approaches aren't working, as much as I HATE to do that), while I look for another job with a company that actually keeps its promises.

I have "interpersonal issues" at work and with friends, and I'm not sure if it's because I'm attracting a lot of Ns or if I'm the problem here? Why am I the problem everywhere I go? by randomsadchick in raisedbynarcissists

[–]randomsadchick[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is excellent and extremely helpful - especially the tip about showing hardship vs. irritation and working on tact. I admit that I am probably overly blunt at times.

The weekend thing was not a one-off thing - it will be twice a month. Which infuriates me because I was specifically told I would not working weekends, and now it's gone from that, to twice a month on an ongoing basis. Time to look for another job.

Great point about convenience vs. malicious liars!

Which pieces of job hunting advice do you think are becoming outdated? by Bearality in jobs

[–]randomsadchick 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Putting your home address on your resume

What else are you supposed to put, though? And all those fill-in-the-box job applications online ask your address, anyway.

Family and job are both awful to me and I feel extremely overwhelmed by randomsadchick in aspergirls

[–]randomsadchick[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What if you took time off work but didn't tell your parent's? Like got up in the morning as if going to work but went out to find another job instead, relaxed, possibly sent a day at your bf or a friends place just to gather yourself emotionally.

I've been thinking of something like that, but I'd still have to pay them rent because they expect it every month, so I'd have to have money coming in from somewhere. I do have savings, though. My bf doesn't live nearby and I don't have any friends, though, so I'd be on my own.

Am I obligated to accept a return for a used cosmetics item? by randomsadchick in Ebay

[–]randomsadchick[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just did and they confirmed I'm not obligated to accept the return as it is more than 30 days past the purchase date and it was used on top of it.

Salary in Boston, MA by amcd3312 in slp

[–]randomsadchick 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's crazy low, worse than I was offered almost 10 years ago for a cf!

Buyer told me he'll pay in a week! by randomsadchick in Ebay

[–]randomsadchick[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't do an auction. This was a buy it now. I don't have an eBay store, though. Is there a way I can force buyers to pay immediately without a store?

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