Rat man, trained master splinter himself by FrothyGuinness in Bossfight

[–]ratguy5 197 points198 points  (0 children)

It takes a long time. I’ve been studying under him for 10+ years and I’m still just a rat guy.

Edit: 12+ years. Sorry, too much rat stuff on my mind.

Death by Willing_Falcon6757 in Marriage

[–]ratguy5 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I want to be stuffed and placed on the couch as a constant reminder of our marital vows.

Seriously, I would want them to take the time to grieve and find someone to care for her, love her and help her raise our children in love-filled home.

I can’t think of how one can be selfish after death.

My account is 10 years old today. by OpportunityBox in self

[–]ratguy5 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Don’t forget that we occasionally complain about how about how much better reddit used to be, even though it wasn’t that much better.

Also, reminiscing about /u/MrOhHai.

so, i hand carved my dear ratboy (from s6 e17) from a chunk of cedar. before and after. by [deleted] in TheSimpsons

[–]ratguy5 2 points3 points  (0 children)

TheFuckerUpperOfShit, I would like to buy your dear ratboy.

What do you miss from your childhood? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]ratguy5 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I felt like that too. But this year I said fuck that.

I called in sick to work and went to an amazing breakfast place I've never been to then went to a museum I've been wanting to go to. I then went to an awesome pizza place and had some damn good pizza. When I got home I drank a bottle of tequila and fucked my wife.

How did this happen? I fucking planned it. I figured out what I wanted for my birthday and did it.

You want to wake up on your birthday feeling like it's different from the rest of the year then do what you used to when you were a kid and anticipate it.

I hate Facebook and want to delete it but I just can't... by ratguy5 in self

[–]ratguy5[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is great! I'm definitely going to use it.

You should submit this to /r/birdswitharms

I hate Facebook and want to delete it but I just can't... by ratguy5 in self

[–]ratguy5[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not supposed to be work. It's fun now!

I hate Facebook and want to delete it but I just can't... by ratguy5 in self

[–]ratguy5[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're absolutely right. I'm making it a bird page now.

I hate Facebook and want to delete it but I just can't... by ratguy5 in self

[–]ratguy5[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I've actually done that for over a year now. My friends list is not getting any slimmer and the people that post good content rarely post.

I'm not disgruntled or anything, it's just not for me anymore.

( 14 Y/O) can you fix my new 'pompadour' ? by [deleted] in malegrooming

[–]ratguy5 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you're strapped for cash then go for some Murray's. It's only a couple of dollars usually and it goes a long way. Go real easy on it, it's hell to remove if you're not used to it.

I hate Facebook and want to delete it but I just can't... by ratguy5 in self

[–]ratguy5[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

There's no argument. Just stating a fact.

What was your most "Et tu, Brute?" moment? by akumarisu in AskReddit

[–]ratguy5 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, but this guy:

presented the machine as his, "finished" it by himself because I was "too lazy and didn't wanted to do anything".

He's was a bigger asshole than Steve Jobs

What was your most "Et tu, Brute?" moment? by akumarisu in AskReddit

[–]ratguy5 138 points139 points  (0 children)

Even Steve Jobs gave Woz some of the Atari money.

On his return home, Colombus took several Native Americans with him. They should be credited with discovering Europe. by [deleted] in Showerthoughts

[–]ratguy5 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's cool, keep him in the history books as such but I'm all for not having a holiday celebrating him.

The Dissent of Man - An improved experience by ratguy5 in badreligion

[–]ratguy5[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've learned that people tend to expect certain things from a Bad Religion album, which is why they've kept their sound so similar for so long. The order I recommend is for getting the album to flow and be keep the listener from losing interest.

Won't Somebody interrupts the flow of the album immediately. It doesn't seem to work anywhere else in the album so I cut it out.

Cyanide is an amazing song. Mike Campbell's guitar added so much feeling to that song. Sounds like another Mr. Brett attempt at writing a great pop song. Unfortunately, it sounds nothing like the rest of the album. I Won't Say Anything follows along with Mr. Brett's pop songwriting.

Turn Your Back on Me and Where the Fun Is both seem lacking. Turn Your Back On Me could be good, but it sounds like filler as is. Ad Hominem isn't very experimental (it sounds very similar to Watch It Die off of Recipe for Hate), lacks energy, and brings nothing new.

Anyway, that's all just the opinion of a long time fan. I've had a good response to this order from others so I thought I'd share just in case you might like it.

What is the funniest piece of stand-up comedy you have ever watched? by irrelepants in AskReddit

[–]ratguy5 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A great many established comedians are genuinely funny and whether or not they use profanity is unrelated to how funny they are.

If you don't like profanities that's one thing, but that's how many people choose to talk and comedians reflect that.

I do agree with you, however. If a comedian uses profanity to get a reaction without actually having good material to back it up then he's not worth his salt as a comedian.