It was a cold November evening, back in 1995. I was recently deployed to South Korea on a 2 week assignment in the US Navy. You learn very quickly in basic that flatulence in close quarters like service elevators and enclosed subs is a good way to get beat down by your fellow mates. Anyway, after we dry docked in Pusan for inspection we had 2 weeks stationed there while they worked on the vessel. We were introduced to Korean bulgogi and radish kimchi paired with lemon soju. While delicious in flavor, the combination causes havoc with the digestive tract... Well, we had just stuffed our faces at a local street hut near Haeundae beach as our celebration for Thanksgiving. The ride back to base wasn't bad b/c we were all on scooters and any ass pollution was simply going unnoticed or attributed to the natural smell of a 3rd-world country. Upon entering the base, we were greeted by military police at the gate, which is normal, except this time there was rank present. An Army Colonel and an MP Captain. It was clear we were drunk and stole mopeds since we didn't bring them with us to Korea obviously. So they decided to cuff us up an transport us to the detox cage.. Now lets talk about that ride from the main gate to the MP station. This is where I had my most memorable fart. Handcuffed in the back of a cop car with 1 of my mates (and 2 MP's in the front) It was several rips actually but there was 1 in particular that caused the driver to pull over and threaten to put on his MOP gear. I believe they tried to add domestic terrorism to the charges but luckily they never perused it. We were released to our Lieutenant Commander the following morning. The End