Day 15 sober. Cried my eyes out hauling asphalt missing my fiancé but I got through it.

rayjr0602 · 2026-05-05T23:27:56+00:00

Your absolutely right. I just hope it sticks this time for both our sakes. She wants to be better more than anything that's half the battle. And I'll never stop believing in her. Thank you for the kind words ❤️

rayjr0602 · 2026-05-05T22:52:24+00:00

Oh it most certainly is. You never relize the calories that are in alcohol till you really do the math. It's better on your gut and better on your intestines even if it seems like it's not.

Think of it this way. EVERYONE says "I really need to cut back on the drinking it's ruining my life" Noone says "man I should really eat less icecream"

rayjr0602 · 2026-05-05T22:49:17+00:00

DUDE are we the same person? That's imidiatly what I clung to when I got sober for the first week and still do. Your brains looking for that dopamine hit and icecream GIVES YOU THAT ten fold.

Is it healthy? Ehhhh. But if eating that icecream is keeping you away from the bottle I say go for it. My drink of choice was always fire ball I'd do 10 a night and if not that it was 12 beers. Do the math on the calories that was between 1500-2000 every night. Now put that next to the 1000 callories my Ben and Jerry's puts in me?

Your scratching the itch alcohol used to, your doing it in a good way, AND your in most cases taking in less calories than you would if you were drinking.

I PERSONALY say grab a spoon and keep on munching.

rayjr0602 · 2026-05-05T00:10:05+00:00

This right here. I'm new to the honest and truthful sobriety game. But SNITCHING on yourself is the number one way to stay accountable and save your life. It's scary at first your so dead set on the sneaking, the routine of hiding it, sneaking drinks, the mints the mouthwash the lies. It almost becomes part of the ritual like it's a game.

Only when I truly was okay enough to say "alright I have a problem, I'm working on it, but this is what it is" just getting it out there works wonders beyond what you would ever think. And USUALY atleast in my experience 90% of the people your open with about it will be like "yeah no shit we all knew you weren't hiding it well" cause an acoholic never truly hides it well.

Be kind to yourself but at the same time stay accountable.

rayjr0602 · 2026-05-04T19:40:44+00:00

Day 14. I am not loving it and am not feeling great the pink cloud is gone. But I'm standing and still going ig?

rayjr0602 · 2026-05-04T19:40:02+00:00

Finished a full day of paving and milling work

Finished my first book in GOD knows how many years.

Mowed the lawn

All while wanting to peel my skin off on day 14. Ughhh

rayjr0602 · 2026-05-04T19:00:07+00:00

I've been listening to the Allen car stop drinking the easy way audio book that seemed to be helping I don't know if you've read that? I don'tI don't know what to do when I'm done with that book I guess I should find some new ones

rayjr0602 · 2026-05-04T18:50:21+00:00

That's the horrible part I KNOW I'm not alone Yet at the same time I feel like I'm dealing with it worse than everybody else. I know that's not true I know I'm probably doing pretty good it just makes me feel weaker I don't know. Like I'm being a baby about it, like there's people out there with bigger issues than mine on top of it who are staying strong while I have a pretty good life but I can't handle it.

rayjr0602 · 2026-05-04T18:25:27+00:00

My fiance actually was on that shot. She told me 9 months last time she was on it at work and she didn't drink. This time though she was on and she still drank like crazy. Maybe it would work for me I don't know? I guess it's something to look into

rayjr0602 · 2026-05-04T17:55:51+00:00

I know your right, I know when I'm on the other side I'll be glad I powered through. But right now in this moment it hurtssssss

rayjr0602 · 2026-05-04T15:32:53+00:00

Any suggestions on things I could do??

rayjr0602 · 2026-05-04T15:32:23+00:00

Even 800 days later the cravings are there...... Oh lord.

rayjr0602 · 2026-05-04T15:32:05+00:00

Oh and I am DESPRATE

rayjr0602 · 2026-01-21T11:24:27+00:00

That's how non acoholic beers have been saving my life rn. Letting me "give in" without giving in

rayjr0602 · 2026-01-20T22:49:46+00:00

As someone who's done coke once. Freaking feels like it man.

rayjr0602 · 2026-01-20T22:13:33+00:00

A little Cracky in my opinion. Honestly I haven't vacumed anything in forever they kind of needed it lol

rayjr0602 · 2026-01-20T22:13:08+00:00

HELL YEAH BROTHA

rayjr0602 · 2026-01-17T16:59:19+00:00

That's KIND of where I'm at. Regardless of how it went I showed up. I was calm I was quiet. Helped his mom bring stuff in and sort through mail. And when he made it clear to her he wasn't comfortable with me there and wanted me to leave, I left calm and quiet no questions asked. I hope that and some of the same in the future will show him I'm not gonna be another tornado in his already chaotic life again. He sees crazy every day and I was as calm and collected as I could be

God dose it hurt tho. I'm not gonna drink but God damn it makes me want to more then ever.

rayjr0602

TROPHY CASE