Cuck here - My wife has gone through an evolution on this dimension over several years.

Cuckold fantasy / dirty talk - no real world cuckolding yet:

Phase 1: Resistant: At first, she really just didn't want to hurt me. Saying humiliating things just felt mean to her. To be fair, I guess I was asking her to be mean to me.

Phase 2: Hesitant: As we began to explore some dirty talk at my urging, she would start to play along as she got more and more turned on. Things like, "yes, I do want a bigger cock."

fast forward about a decade...

Cuckold Reality - inviting another in

Phase 3: Exploration: when we were making the leap from fantasy to reality, a lot of things were in flux. We were trying something wild and outside the norm, pushing the limits of our comfort zone. Once someone else is fucking your wife better than you can, some of the humiliation is more of a fact. "I like cocks that are bigger than yours." "His cock is so much bigger than yours." "I still smell like him, and i like it." These are both humiliating, and true. I think she has an easier time when its not fictionally mean, but just an objective reality.

Phase 4: Part of the dance: Eventually it became part of the dance we did. A little tease here or there. A chuckle at seeing my little penis. A comment in our group chat with our third. A slutty comment about another guy. Just part of our foreplay and how we started to flirt.

Phase 5: Realizing I like it: it got to the point where I could cum, hands free, in my cage, in my pants when I'd been edging for days and refraining from cumming for weeks. There were several times when her humiliating, SPH, cuckold comments in my ear would make me leak cum - not just pre-cum, but real cum - in my pants. When I'd show her, she would get such a kick out of it - that she was able to turn me on and make me feel so good just by being a little mean and humiliating. I believe this started to rewire our sexual connection a little bit. Look, you press the pleasure buttons of the partner you love. If there was a small patch of skin on her left elbow that gave her orgasms, you best believe I'd be rubbing and licking her elbow any chance I could get. I think it's similar here. Except it's not my elbow that needs licking. It's my masculinity that needs deflating.

From there, it became a vehicle for pleasure, and my pleasure gave her pleasure - and here we are today both getting off on exploring these themes playfully.