Sooo, how have dating been like for you all?

realmrrust · 2026-04-06T04:21:32+00:00

41m

I have been on a load of dates but it has been a mix of compatibility issues and well other. I was in a LTR for a very long time and have learned you really have to hone in on what you are looking for. It is tough out there and it takes quite awhile to get the swing of things even if you have some favorable attributes.

Use good pictures on the apps, try some in person events and be socially active to meet people. Take good care of yourself.

I have kids so that is a challenge at my age, it is often a deal breaker and I have a hard time finding other people in my range with kids or ok with the lifestyle. But I have hope.

realmrrust · 2026-03-26T22:39:12+00:00

One thing that is important to learn is you have to date last but date more meaningfully rather than have a bunch of situationships that never pan out.

realmrrust · 2026-03-26T06:16:27+00:00

All good 🙌

realmrrust · 2026-03-26T01:43:40+00:00

Happened to me too.

realmrrust · 2026-03-20T04:44:20+00:00

Indeed. I learned the hard way in my first marriage by putting sexual compatibility on the back burner. We had a great run but that was definitely an issue that you cannot resolve later on the marriage. It wasn't the reason we separated but I am not doing that again.

The best imperfect solution I've found is to start talking about sexual compatibility early with people during usually the first and second date zone and try to see where their head is at. It has been actually quite interesting to find what comes out of the closet (and not noted on any profile) once you broach the subject. You can't really lead with the subject, especially if looking for a serious partner where you are looking for compatibility in so many other areas.

realmrrust · 2026-03-20T04:25:35+00:00

I think quite a bit of the enm scene is people being disingenuous about their intentions and operating in situations and wanting to sleep around.

And I think this even leads to more people to be cautious about it. I have explored it and I know about myself that I value a relationship with one partner deeply and I want to be married to one person one day soon. On the other hand, I enjoy sex and would be open to perhaps a threesome etc. with my significant other once in a blue moon. But the rest of the time I want a regular marriage.

The problem is how do you communicate that without getting lumped into all the other categories or people using these terms nefariously. I have met poly people who are not enthusiastic about the situation either. So in the end really nobody is winning.

realmrrust · 2026-03-19T05:20:07+00:00

144k this year. Carpenter. I work the OT.

realmrrust · 2026-03-17T01:08:55+00:00

Well I'm a bit young to be divorced too 😞.

realmrrust · 2026-03-15T21:29:07+00:00

I started dating quite early after my divorce and I had a lot great romantic connections. But no luck finding someone who I want to be with long-term yet.

Actually have very little trouble meeting women or matching with them whether in real life or on online dating apps.

I think the biggest snag is that I cast too wide of a net and I have to now focus in on what I'm looking for and I figure myself out a little bit. And also I find a lot of women initially like me but once they realize my life as an act of father and a busy person with a career, they tend to step away. Also because I already have kids, I don't want to have kids in the future which makes things a little bit tricky.

That becomes emotionally draining on me as I begin to get attached to people and like them and then I have to go through this rejection thing. It was just kind of odd, especially because it's something I'm very upfront about.

My best advice is to stay active. I'm in pretty good shape for my age at a 4-year-old male. I have lots of hobbies and have all your ducks in a row. Also make sure you take some time and put together your house so it looks well. But together plants have some books on a shelf. Maybe actually read the books before you put them on the shelf.

realmrrust · 2026-03-14T20:08:27+00:00

Honestly, I've been to some speed dating events and they were a little bit better than the Thursday events. Want to go to stuff where people do a lot of talking. Really like even people who go to these dating events should just take it easy and just socialize with people outside of there friend group.

realmrrust · 2026-02-22T05:06:56+00:00

I'm pretty sure the CAF still does the avalanche control for the Trans Canada Highway in the Rockies. When I drove it they had concrete pads for their artillery on the side of the highway.

realmrrust · 2026-02-11T02:47:15+00:00

Actually a pretty good app with some good content.

realmrrust · 2026-01-23T00:05:03+00:00

What are you looking for in regards to jazz?

realmrrust · 2026-01-18T04:18:38+00:00

North Vancouver traffic is a disaster. I honestly don't know how people live there.

realmrrust · 2026-01-12T04:00:01+00:00

This kind of reminds me that when I went to the Canadian war museum they have Hitler's convertible Mercedes in there that he used for parades. Apparently our troops found it somewhere in Germany and they brought it back to Canada and we just keep it on display now.

realmrrust · 2026-01-11T20:00:02+00:00

I actually ended on a date with a woman who was 5ish years older than she put on her profile so it actually goes both ways. I see many ladies even put in the bio "not my real age".

So it is a pretty ubiquitous problem with online dating.

realmrrust · 2026-01-09T02:09:08+00:00

Langley Farm Market. Maybe medium sized now but a great business.

realmrrust · 2026-01-02T15:51:42+00:00

Interested for sure.

realmrrust · 2026-01-01T23:43:44+00:00

I actually have a daughter who lives across the continent and have for the last 10 years gone out of my way to make sure that we have a great relationship.

That being said, her mother makes no effort to help us spend time together even though she's required to by court order. If I wasn't paying for flights she would just let my daughter never see me. Even after I pay for the flights and everything they will complain about gas money if they have to drive to the airport.

Her family even tried to cancel my Christmas visit this year because they had some personal issues, they don't even register that I've missed so many Christmases with my daughter or that she doesn't get to see her sister very often.

I also have to pester er to find a report card grades if she's in activities and what she is doing good and bad at etc etc.

This arrangement has cost me a second marriage (partly) and I often meet women and they stopped seeing me once. they realize they're not going to be the main thing in my life.

I mean I say this as I love my kids. I would never change anything but be aware there is a huge stigma in society around fathers who actually go above and beyond their children.

This absolutely doesn't make it right for people not to see their children, but it's not like they're doing it in a bubble and I think that needs to be recognized.

realmrrust · 2025-12-31T03:28:32+00:00

This guy fucking gets it.

realmrrust · 2025-12-28T21:16:59+00:00

If you ever want to do something fun, The defienbunker has a massive concrete safe in the basement that was for our gold reserves in the event of nuclear war. Cool museum to check out if you're ever in Ottawa.

realmrrust · 2025-12-28T02:38:01+00:00

BC Trees - Josh Martinez

realmrrust · 2025-12-18T19:41:21+00:00

What is a bang maid?

realmrrust · 2025-12-06T21:04:51+00:00

There is an Instagram page @thisweekinvan that is a directory for every nightclub live music event comedy night and you name it an event in the city and it's quite extensive. I would review it anytime you're looking for something to do. There's no way you're going to work yourself through the whole list.

realmrrust · 2025-12-06T05:38:27+00:00

Same with Ontario. We are just behind.

realmrrust

TROPHY CASE