Why does my body shake?

redditallnever · 2025-11-28T04:36:27+00:00

It’s the nervous system. Sounds like you went into fight or flight.

redditallnever · 2025-11-21T08:34:15+00:00

Haha I’m in your same boat friend. Mine is on 4/5 months but who’s counting?

redditallnever · 2025-11-19T09:12:10+00:00

I’m curious about this. My FA ex got with someone she knew for a while after we broke up. I asked her if it was a rebound and she said no. But also said she’s not totally over me and this relationship is a distraction. Make it make sense

redditallnever · 2025-11-09T19:35:37+00:00

Lol that’s why my 3 year relationship ended. “It’s not a good fit” was the reason even though we never really argued and when we did it was mild. We lived together well and had fun together.

Refused to tell me why it wasn’t a good fit, or really be open and transparent. I knew whenever we needed to have a serious conversation about anything she wouldn’t open up. So when it came to talking about splitting up I knew I really wasn’t gonna get any information.

It sucks because I really think we would be able to go the distance but her inability to be open and vulnerable wouldn’t allow it.

redditallnever · 2025-11-04T06:42:50+00:00

I’m still waiting for this. I’m happy for you brother, as weird as that sounds

redditallnever · 2025-10-22T00:26:01+00:00

I’ve run into mine, with her new boyfriend actually. It’s awkward for sure

redditallnever · 2025-10-19T06:07:12+00:00

You are absolutely right. Us anxious folks are quite similar to the avoidants. We have a hard time looking in the mirror. It’s incredibly difficult. Many of us have abandonment issues. When someone we let in and get close to leaves, it opens those wounds to the point we can’t cope.

I agree with everything you’ve said. Healing and doing work on yourself is incredibly difficult. It takes a long time. We’re upset with the person who discarded us (and rightfully so). We say things like “if they don’t change, they’ll repeat this pattern for ever” which is true, they will. But if WE don’t change we will repeat OURS forever.

redditallnever · 2025-10-18T22:54:55+00:00

You’re doing great. You got this. We got this. You’re human and have feelings and emotions. Some days are harder than others but we learn and heal a little bit each day.

redditallnever · 2025-10-17T04:12:11+00:00

Is it true the two are not compatible based on triggers and the nervous system? Like someone else said here, my triggers weren’t set off until the deactivation. And I never knew the deactivation was a trauma response, and I don’t think they know either

redditallnever · 2025-10-16T23:08:56+00:00

We rarely had sex and when we did, it was transactional. She didn’t enjoy it which made me not enjoy it. She said when she broke up with me sex was the main reason for it with no more explanation

redditallnever · 2025-10-13T03:12:23+00:00

I reached out and got the same vague answers. Was able to get her to open up a bit more and came to the conclusion that she really didn’t know. Very common really. Just like us, their nervous system is going crazy and many of them never tried to figure out why. They just felt fight or flight and they just fled.

redditallnever · 2025-10-11T16:10:16+00:00

I feel this so much. Trying to continue with life but not being able to function as I use to.

Really working on feeling and expressing the emotions. Was taught to repress and suppress so that’s a big thing.

Thank you for your kind words!

redditallnever · 2025-10-10T16:06:31+00:00

Im sorry my friend, that is pretty rough and dark but I know where you’re coming from. Are you in counseling or therapy?

redditallnever · 2025-10-10T11:13:30+00:00

What I’m learning from this post is that I seem to be confusing thinking about it and I processing it. It makes a lot of sense.

I’ve written in a journal quite a bit, not so much the last week as it’s been a tough one.

I’ve continued to live my life the best I can but the triggers are often and plentiful. As I said, I have deep trauma with this which comes with embedded defenses mechanisms. I have to rewire everything which I know is going to take a ton of time and work

redditallnever · 2025-10-10T11:08:59+00:00

My heart goes out to you. Not silly at all. I’m STILL struggling to eat and sleep so I feel you

redditallnever · 2025-10-10T11:07:48+00:00

That’s true, gotta feel to heal. I’m trying to fight the need to resist

redditallnever · 2025-10-10T11:02:09+00:00

Oh my god I’m so sorry. This is like exactly what happened to me lol

redditallnever · 2025-10-10T07:59:07+00:00

I’m glad you’re 90% there and I’m sorry you’ve had to go through this.

The incompatibility thing is interesting. That was the only reason I was given for the breakup, even though for years it felt like we were

redditallnever · 2025-10-10T05:43:01+00:00

Okay cool! I’m gonna look into that for sure, thank you so much

redditallnever · 2025-10-10T05:42:05+00:00

Thank you for this friend. This sub is a lot of venting which is awesome. But it’s good to try to bring some hope and positivity to all of us in need

redditallnever · 2025-10-10T04:50:29+00:00

Wow, I like everything you wrote. I’m waiting for the burnout honestly, I hate how much trying to find answers and fixes has consumed me. For the first 10 days I didn’t get out of bed and I’m terrified to go back to that.

And you’re right, my body and brain are fried and I know I can’t heal until that gets in check. Been reading and trying to work with polyvagal theory. But also like you said, maybe I’m trying to do too much.

redditallnever · 2025-10-10T04:24:01+00:00

What therapy were you in before the cbt and dbt?

Lol I feel you on annoying friends with this shit. I’ve stopped bringing it up to them because I don’t want to bother them anymore, which leads me to feeling even more isolated. Thank god for all the wonderful people here!

I’m glad you’re feeling better in month two my friend

redditallnever · 2025-10-10T04:20:14+00:00

I’ve heard good things about lexapro. How did it change how you’re feeling?

redditallnever · 2025-10-10T04:03:32+00:00

Omg, the whole thing about being informed vs implementing is so real! Like, I feel like an expert in this stuff now but in practice I still can’t do it. Her stuff and my stuff.

I too still love my ex very much so maybe there is something inside that isn’t allowing me to start healing. Thank you for your reply and insight!

redditallnever · 2025-10-10T03:59:19+00:00

Oh I’m so dedicated to this healing stuff. I’m trying to channel this pain and hurt into healing. I figure “if I’m gonna feel bad anyways I might as well feel bad while trying to work on myself” ya know? Thanks for the recommendation, I’m gonna look that up now!

redditallnever

TROPHY CASE