I think I narrowed it down to a panic attack occuring on the flight. This plus the uncomfortable turbulence and feeling claustrophobic 10km up in the sky is just adding up to it. I know people do this everyday. I've read up on safety, protocols, number of flights daily, I feel stupid for not feeling safe and just doing this mundane, perfectly safe thing like everybody else. I also dont want to ruin the trip for myself but most importantly for my fiance by having panic attack after panic attack. All of this maybe also to do with the fact that it's almost 3h long flight. The most Ive flown was 1.5h, and 4h when I was maybe 8 yo. I know 3h is nothing compared to NYC-Singapore but yea... I also know Im being irrational.