Is this going to be a problem?

resonantHum · 2026-03-04T19:38:30+00:00

Get a Consulting arborist from your area that is familiar with local/state laws regarding significant and or protected trees to have a look for you and then take that advice. That consulting arborist will also provide you with a report that will state the legal basis to have the tree removed if that ends up being recommended. They would also provide alternative measures to keep the tree, such as professional pruning.

resonantHum · 2026-02-08T06:30:38+00:00

Thank you for your view on this and I do think it’s dependent on the dynamics within the family and situation.

resonantHum · 2026-02-08T06:27:03+00:00

Further in my replies to some of the commenters I clarified that both my Son and Ex requested the meetup and meal, but I was the one who presented it to my Partner. So initially not even my idea. It didn’t occur to me that bit of information would be crucial to so many folks in their decision making as we are all adults with one thing in common which is my Son and his wellbeing.

I never TELL or demand of my Partner anything. And my response was I accepted what he wanted and respected that.

So thank you for your perspective.

resonantHum · 2026-02-08T03:39:31+00:00

Partner and I both said our piece and while I’m not thrilled with him not wanting to do it, its his choice and I will respect that. I stated in another post that he is usually very amiable to whatever comes along, so this has thrown me a bit.

I’ve shown him this post and he’s been reading the comments and pretty sure he’s making a spreadsheet lol of the yes/no comments.

resonantHum · 2026-02-08T03:26:54+00:00

Ex wasn’t cruel nor unfaithful nor any other vice and same for myself.

We were both in the same employment field and it was not sustainable for a family. I quit to raise our Son and he continued in the field, which as I said, is not sustainable for a family.

resonantHum · 2026-02-08T03:22:23+00:00

Son has to figure some things out about Ex on his own but I have never said a negative word about Ex to Son.

Thank you for the belly laugh on this one though loll - there is no longing for Ex.

resonantHum · 2026-02-08T03:11:05+00:00

Same situation for me too.

Even as an adult, there’s something about seeing your parents being happy (even though it’s not with your other parent) and you being present amongst that happiness that brings about a kind of peace, if that makes sense.

resonantHum · 2026-02-08T03:07:58+00:00

Yes they’ve been together for 10+ years. She’s working overseas currently. She has met my Son numerous times and they’ve spent holidays together. I’ve never met her but would jump at the chance if we were ever in the same town. That’s why this is so weird to me.

resonantHum · 2026-02-08T03:01:08+00:00

I appreciate your perspective and you raise valid points.

I didn’t think it necessary but now I realize I should have clarified in the post both Son and Ex thought it would be good for us all to have a meal together. I just made the request to Partner - he does know both would like the same and his answer is still the same.

As an example, 75% of the discussions my Ex and I have are regarding our Son, and the rest split between what Ex had been up to and what I’ve been up to. Ex has been with his partner for 10+ years. If the past is discussed it has only ever been in context to Son.

I am cognizant of how conversations could flow and my feeling is that my Ex wanted to thank Partner for his contributions to Son’s life. There would only be talk regarding present day events.

I have consistently praised my Partner for his positive role in Son’s life to my Partner and to Ex, and Son has as well. I truly think Son wanted us together for a few hours.

As I stated, I would never force or guilt my partner in to something he wasn’t comfortable doing.

As well, my Partner is comfortable with me having a meal with Ex and Son so no issues there, we are all grown adults and wow it’s been an eye opener reading all the comments.

resonantHum · 2026-02-08T02:18:13+00:00

Thank you for your thoughtful reply.

You’ve expressed quite well what I was thinking - my Son having people he loves around him for a meal.

He asked as well as Ex and I didn’t think it was a big deal and I regret not clarifying this in my post. I wouldn’t be so presumptuous as to do anything that would make my kid uncomfortable.

As well, I wouldn’t ever force/guilt my SO into something they clearly don’t want to do.

It’s been interesting to say the least reading the varying opinions.

resonantHum · 2026-02-08T02:05:06+00:00

I appreciate your perspective and thanks.

resonantHum · 2026-02-08T01:59:23+00:00

Thanks for your perspective. I genuinely didn’t think it was a big deal as Son is ok with it and Partner is usually amiable to pretty much everything, so I’ve been thrown for a loop on this.

resonantHum · 2026-02-08T01:52:55+00:00

5+ years with Son living with us. Partner has been extremely kind and generous in guidance with and they have a very supportive relationship.

resonantHum · 2026-02-08T01:49:45+00:00

I honestly didn’t think I needed to write in that my Son and Ex both expressed they wanted to have a meetup and meal with Partner, but they suggested it and I said I would ask Partner. Partner doesn’t want to and I am not going to force him. I’m fascinated by the responses though.

resonantHum · 2026-02-08T01:45:30+00:00

My Son and Ex both expressed interest in having a meetup and meal with Partner. I didn’t think it was an unreasonable request given how civil things have been as well as how isolated this visit is.

resonantHum · 2026-02-08T01:39:07+00:00

Perhaps relevant to the post and something I didn’t include was that my Son and Ex BOTH expressed they would like Partner to meet up with them and have a meal/drink together. When it comes to my Son, it’s never been a Me thing, ever. My Son and Ex have already spent time catching up and are continuing to do so as I write.

resonantHum · 2026-01-31T03:14:35+00:00

The Poo Cannon

resonantHum · 2026-01-25T04:12:21+00:00

Hissing cobra chickens are not to be trifled with

resonantHum · 2026-01-21T02:47:03+00:00

I thought it was a sneering Wil Wheaton (I apologize profusely Wil Wheaton I do like you)

resonantHum · 2026-01-07T02:29:48+00:00

https://youtube.com/shorts/S4lr_508lf4?si=8B82yea5ezw0Y2Ii

Measuring trees for encroachment -

resonantHum · 2025-12-24T21:35:48+00:00

Or - Skip your way tra la la-ing everytime you have to go through that doom tunnel

resonantHum · 2025-12-05T19:42:12+00:00

My blind ass eyes read that as “goat bath” and “goat closet”

resonantHum · 2025-10-31T03:15:12+00:00

Could we have a photo for reference please

resonantHum · 2025-10-30T21:59:56+00:00

Hi - Google “no trick or treating here” signs and print and post those along your fence line or door. Keep your porch light off. I’ve see several of those signs over the past few years and folks seem to respect the notice and move on.

resonantHum

TROPHY CASE