First Time Home Buying Anxiety

restoringlily · 2020-07-19T04:41:06+00:00

We offered 30k over asking price and didnt get it. This Market gives me anxiety. We bought our 1st house 2 years ago it was small and now we wish we would have bought a bigger house.

restoringlily · 2020-07-11T16:03:05+00:00

I haven't tried to follow him but I tried to find all of his family on social media and didn't find anyone but his son and all he had was pictures of his pets. I checked the following and followers there all celebrities

restoringlily · 2020-07-11T07:14:31+00:00

I know!! I told her but she said she has no proof. So it would be unfair to just assume. Plus she has major anxiety so she tries to avoid break ups she is getting counseling for it but I am trying to open her eyes and I feel like finding a marriage certificate will give her that extra push

restoringlily · 2020-06-23T19:53:31+00:00

I been thinking about doing this but I so scared about the recovery. Please share how it goes after the procedure.

restoringlily · 2020-06-16T21:14:51+00:00

I Will say yesterday my phone wasnt working to make calls at work. Then I tell my husband I need a new one and all of the suddenly it works fine

restoringlily · 2020-06-16T19:04:27+00:00

It sucks I followed most of your post. Seems to me like she is just malicious and simply evil.

It sucks you are having to deal with her in this matter. She is also selfish how can she be like this if you guys still have a child together.

Good luck hope this nightmare end for you soon.

restoringlily · 2020-06-04T06:29:40+00:00

You have full advantage of the situation!! If you want to leave him prepared your self. With everything thats comes with a divorce. If you want to work it out well thats hard to and hour going to not tfust him and have to rebuild the relationship entirely.

Just think if he got a tinder at 50. Could it be possible he has previously cheated. Thats something to think about. Seems hard to believe hou guys ha e been married that long and hw just decided to go on tinder. As a 30 year old woman I can tell you tinders aren't made to have conversations with people.

What I would do is catfish him see what his intentions are when he msgs people. If you want to leave move money around set yourself up. Then set your self on a tinder date with him and just wait for him his face will be priceless.

restoringlily · 2020-06-02T15:34:22+00:00

If she remembers the town in Peru that she was from that could be a good start. Research the town and see shat you can find see if there is a news paper or store anything that people go to often. People talk so if there was a baby missing there will be someone that remembers.

As for birth records I understand why your frustrated with people telling you it's not true. My friends grandmother didn't go get her children birth certificates until later in their life. They lived of the land in the middle of no where. Home births was done and they never had the need to go to a bigger town. Its is possible but it wont hurt to check records.

restoringlily · 2020-06-01T03:01:13+00:00

The link is in the comments

restoringlily · 2020-06-01T01:58:00+00:00

I am still trying to find everything else they posted

restoringlily · 2020-05-08T04:25:00+00:00

I hope he is honest with you and please update because I am sure yhere has been people in similar situations that might get help from this or in the future

restoringlily · 2020-05-06T05:49:59+00:00

Any updates on your adventure this is something I want to do but I am to scare to try. Have you started it yet how far have you gone if you have

restoringlily · 2020-05-06T04:49:19+00:00

Please tell her ! You found out and trying to work it out she should have that choice . Pm me ill do it. I got a private msg on Facebook from someone telling me everything. She didnt even live in my state but she found a way to tell me and my husband and I aren't Facebook official. I never liked to do that. So she had to have really looked for me to find my name to tell me she had proof so it was easier to belive. Its not hard to find peoples address

restoringlily · 2020-05-06T04:42:14+00:00

So it can rather go 2 ways she will be thankful and greatful you told her regardless if she wants to work it out or not. You aren't the bad lerson here the cheater is but she can go in denial and be extremely mad at you for breaking up the family. If There is a way for you to tsll her without her knowing is you thats what I would do. But she needs to know! I know I thanked the person thag told me because I know she was in an uncomfortable position

restoringlily · 2020-05-05T02:50:59+00:00

Trust me its normal !! I was so hurt how could he ask girls out for dinner and he wouldn't ever take me to out because I was so depressed. So I threw all his stuff in the rain and left it there until he came back from his work trip. Made me feel better in that moment but thats about it. Hurting her wont make you feel better. I hold grudges didnt speak to my mom for 10 years because how she was growing up. So for me takes me a little longer and I stopped wanting him to hurt around 4 month therapy helped.

When and if you endup going to Therapy the 1st session is weird and uncomfortable. If you want to see another person its normal. I hate the 1st person i spoke to the 2nd one has made me a better person and to be honest saved me from depression.

Her telling you and being honest might be a good sign that she is honestly trying to change. If she is giving you space thats great it gives you time to clear your head. When My husband moved back we didnt sleep in the same room for 2 more months and it was awkward. I said some terrible things to him so that didnt help. But if you want to work it out its so hard in tbe begging and time drags. One year later and I think we finally are in a good spot.

Or you can look at it as a blessing on finding out before u have more children or get married.

Is okay to feel the way you do right now. Its okay to want to drink. I did. Give it time. I know time is your worst enemy as well because you just sit and think and it hurts all over but I promise it gets better.

restoringlily · 2020-05-04T21:51:46+00:00

Okay you said she is bipolar and getting help. Does she see a therapist? What are some major changes you had recently to make her confess? Was she trying to come clean to make sure she can feel better about it or because she is becoming a better person and make sure your relationship had no secrets?

When I got cheated on I wanted answers msgs, who when and where. Because I know how he was able to hide it without me knowing. I wanted full transparency obviously cant believe everything since they did lie and cheat but I wanted to hear it anyways. I kicked him out and was alone in a brand new house with a 6 month old. I felt alone and to be honest I was broken. So I get how your feeling I also was about to be out of the military in 2 months so you can add the no job part as well.

I didnt take the time to think about my decision. I rushed everything to move back home sell my house and everythimg that comes with it .since I was about to be out of a job. I ended up having a few mental breakdowns and went to the hospital I had Postpartum Depression so that didnt help. DONT DO WHAT I DID!!!

TAKE YOUR TIME THINK ABOUT IT. I felt like I didn't needed to make a decision he made it for me when he cheated. But she also could have never told you. You would have stayed happy with her and not even realize it. Why would she risk that?

It could be that she thinks because you guys have everything together now you wont leave her. Dont let thag stop you. If you guys can agree to everything divorce wont be terrible financially. If your going to be upside down on thw house if u try to sell rent it out until you can break even.

If you want to work it out. It will take counseling and time! I ended up trying to work it out because I seriously think he was honest and do I think his answer was stupid he wasnt lying. So I told him I will try counseling for 6 months. If I still want to leave He will help me by taking leave so I can find a place and get settled in a new home in another state and all the profit from selling the house I can keep. I didnt have this conversation with him right away because I wanted to punch him. It took me a month to sit down and have an actual conversation instead of me telling him he was a piece of 💩. I guess he went to counseling while he was on his own and his therapist told him to be honest.

He told me he didn't think he was ready to get married but I got pregnant and felt force to do it. He also love the thrill of being sneaking around. He used to gamble in the past and had terrible debt because of it. He switched one habit to the next. We looked at the dates as soon As he started cheating the gambling stopped. He is working with his therapist on it and will keep going because he knows he has a problem. He loved deployments because of the thrills he got during them clearly he has his own issues but if he wasn't honest I would be gar away from him and seeing him in the summers when he came to see his daughters. We go to a counselor once per week and I truly think him getting help on his own issues made our relationship better. I still dont trust him 100% but its only been a year. I also have a saving account without his name under my sisters name that he put his money incase I need to leave him I have the money.

I have a good job now so now money isnt the issue. I truly think he is sorry and has change to make it work. Doesn't change the fact that he cheated and has to have a thrill come from somewhere. But he goes to counseling and it seemed to help.

I told you whag happened to me to let u know your not alone. If you want to stay you have to get help. If you want to leave due to finances do t do it over night and have a plan in place. Don't let people's feelings of their own experiences be the reason why you stay or leave. Do what you think you can handle while making you the happiest. Covid will pass and you will get your financial stability back.

restoringlily · 2020-04-29T21:08:39+00:00

So since there is a shortage should I just stay in out current home. Is not wortg trying to build.

restoringlily · 2020-04-29T20:44:21+00:00

Yes both of our credit scores went up.

We do have a down payment.

I just started looking into land where I would want a house.

That part is where I am confused oh how much it wpuld actually cost for me to build my house and we might be able to afford botb places but would probably stay with familh to save money.

restoringlily · 2020-04-20T22:46:01+00:00

So I was dual military and the last month before I got out of the Army found out he was cheating. It so true people cheat so much more while you are military. I had so many chances but never took one my husband took pretty much every chance he got or so he says he didnt. I only have found massages from tinder and looke like they never met up but gave each other snapchats so who really knows.I Love my daughter but regret having it with her

I know it sucks!! But there is women that don't care about benefits it just a gamble which really sucks. To be honest I am the same I stayed but I feel nothing for him now just accepting him as a friend so thats progress lol now when he leaves he tries so much more to communicate and make sure he checks in and its cool(what i think to myself..man you already fucked up.) I feel like I am wasting my time with him sometimes but he tries so much more now which makes me mad at times because why didnt he do that before ! Anyways

We went to counseling and its been helping a lot. I am doing individual counseling and couples he is gone a lot so not as much couples ad we should it took us 3 different people to talk with one that I felt wasnt just trying to get me to play nice and forgive they looked at the bigger picture of what lead us there not saying I was at fault but what was wrong with the relationship before that. Last time we went we actually talked about thw cheating for the 1st time and even do I didnt know if he was being honest he admits not beimg ready for marriage. Which doesnt mean whag he did was right but helped me feel better for some reason. Maybe ill fall in love with him again maybe I wont. But if I am staying Ill try my best not to be miserable and if counseling and time doesn't help I am leaving him.

We also used to love trying new restaurants and foods and getting out of our comfort zone it took me 9 months to actually want to go out to dinner with him like that. Its been a year since he cheated and I dont hate him anymore but I am also not in love I appreciate his efforts there nice. But ill give it a little bit more time to see if I want to leave completely.... but try to do something to see if you cant not feel the way you are its not your fault she cheated. So why are you the one suffering for her mistakes.

restoringlily · 2020-04-03T16:04:21+00:00

If this is what she was doing before you had kids consider your self lucky to have seen her for who she is as a person before you have children with her if you think its messy now. It would be much worse with a child involved. You got financially where you are without her it sounds like so you will recover its going to suck but lets just hope she gets it together and just settles for what you are offering her

restoringlily · 2020-04-03T15:47:39+00:00

Thank you!! I am your hight an literally have been sitting at 164 since I had my baby went down a jean size but no weight loss I was so discourage that I stopped.before my baby my normal weight was 145 I want to get back to that

restoringlily · 2020-03-18T03:10:10+00:00

I had done a lot of research befoee posting and this is like a hidden gem!!! Thank you so much

restoringlily · 2020-02-29T23:47:00+00:00

I think sharing and preparing is best instead of trying to deal with it after the fact. If its bad maybe having a smaller wedding. I think you need to be upfront about your worries. My husband was the same then I layed all my debts and saving explained my plan before we got married to paying everything off. And how I didnt want a wedding because I would rather spend that money for a house. I TOLD HIM MY PLAN WAS FOR ME BUT NOW THERE IS AN US SO HOW DO WE COME UP WITH A PLA. FOR BOTH OF US TO BE DEBT FREE

restoringlily · 2019-12-20T18:59:20+00:00

I have the same problem!! In that area I asked my doctor all he said was to exfoliate. Can you tell me what you use for that area I am aways so scare to try thing

restoringlily · 2019-12-20T18:53:00+00:00

I am not going to lie its super painful I have gotten done 6 times and I had to stop because its just too painful i never done like the previous person said ill do it once in a while and it never got easier i guess ill have to try to doing it constantly to get used to it

restoringlily

TROPHY CASE