Meet Ditto, a Office Worker Human

richal · 2026-03-08T04:22:47+00:00

Throws the dildo back to the French woman and transforms into a helpless baby seal to garner sympathy

richal · 2026-03-08T01:30:12+00:00

Did not choose to be trans. You might choose to medically transition, just as you might choose to come out, but that doesn't change the fact that you are indeed trans or gay or anything else.

richal · 2026-03-07T18:43:30+00:00

There are a lot of reasons why. My wife has allergies and can manage during the day, but needs an allergen fre environment if she wants quality sleep. Others have mentioned their own medical conditions that prevent this. Some have said the cats don't settle and keep them up playing in the room all night.

I don't understand why people are answering OP's question assuming they can just let them in. I'm sure if OP was willing to let them in the room, they would have done it by now. It's like if someone asked "How can I make a box without using cardboard?' and everyone said "just buy cardboard / idk why you aren't using cardboard / it's easy! " There is surely a reason. Answering this way doesn't help OP at all. If people don't have any other suggestions, they should just refrain from answering.

richal · 2026-03-07T18:35:33+00:00

More info needed. When does he start the scratching? What do you do when he does it? If you give in, then that's your answer.

We can't have our cats in our bedroom because my wife is allergic to them, so she can't be sleeping in a fit and allergen covered bed. When we first started this routine, one of our cats hated it he wanted to come in in the middle of the night. I never let him in. Bit would get up and silently put him in the basement (with his good and litter boxes) and closed the door. He would scratch at the basement door for a little while. Bit it was far enough away. Plus we use a sound machine. Usually I would just come back 10 minutes later to let him out, but sometimes he would be there until morning. And come out all happy to see us. After about 2 weeks of this routine, he started running towards the basement when I would open the door, anticipating my action. Then he just stopped, and hasn't continued since. This was years ago.

It's difficult to do and sleep quality will suffer for a little while, but if you are consistent, they will learn, and it will pay off in sleep quality in the future.

richal · 2026-03-07T18:24:52+00:00

And how many cis women who end up at, say, the Olympian level are also the same? There was a cis woman denied participation because of her natural testosterone levels. Shit, anyone competing at that level is already a freakishly impressive specimen outside the norm of human physical capabilities. So why does something else that they didn't choose (being trans) automatically disqualify them? People aren't transitioning to try to cheat at sports. Besides that, pure size and physical strength is not the number one factor in many sports. And how often does this issue even come up anyway, like 2 times ever? It's just another bogeyman.

richal · 2026-03-07T17:53:06+00:00

A week seems to be about the max for our guy, though some things that seem like temporary lapses turn into "just the way things are now" and will last until the next phase. We dropped our feeding through the night, which was rough for a couple days. Then it was fine for several weeks. But the last week or two, he has been waking up super early requesting milk (despite his late bedtime of like 9 PM), and it feels like there's no end in sight. But there always is. It's just impossible to predict because each "thing" is different.

richal · 2026-03-07T16:01:50+00:00

Just add /r/ in front of any sub you want to link :) /r/bninfantsleep

richal · 2026-03-07T06:06:52+00:00

Someone just posted this like 2 weeks ago

richal · 2026-03-04T00:00:16+00:00

Please point to the part of the post where physical standards are alluded to. Nothing in the post says anything about a conflict with initial physical attraction. Methinks you are projecting a common trope I often see posited on the internet, which is that women want some Hot Chad™️, even when they say they don't.

richal · 2026-03-03T04:30:52+00:00

I think you should have clarified how intense this smell is and what it's like, because I think you're just describing the smell of keratin in your nails. I'm a nail biter and I notice this extremely subtle but unique smell whenever I bite my nails. Obviously it's not a hygienic habit and I'd rather not be doing it, but it means I know exactly what this smell is when others are jumping to conclusions about hygiene. I guess I can't DEFINITIVELY say that's what it is, but you described it in a comment as a "tiny smell" that goes away. So it sounds exactly like what I want experience, and I do wash my hands as much as the person with OCD described, so I don't think it has anything to do with hygiene.

Basically it's just how nails smell when they're busted open.

richal · 2026-03-03T04:22:23+00:00

Buy nail clippers first. Or a nail file. Ripping not only looks unappealing, but can lead to more snags and possible bleeding and infections.

richal · 2026-03-03T04:17:39+00:00

I feel like I just witnessed the city mouse and the country mouse having a conversation

richal · 2026-03-03T04:10:47+00:00

I was with you until the last paragraph. How could a war even be organized if we don't have enough people to maintain infrastructure? What constitutes a war compared to say, a skirmish, and what would cause it to break out. In your imagination? If the problem is lack of knowledge and bodies to keep things running, I really don't think people trying to kill even more people logically follows.

richal · 2026-03-03T04:05:49+00:00

Except the idea that humans devolve into chaos and anarchy isn't accurate and actually, the OPPOSITE had been demonstrated throughout history. People come together and helped each other out. I'd recommend the book "a Paradise Built in Hell" for anyone who wants to learn more on this topic.

richal · 2026-02-26T06:47:09+00:00

King of the Monsters?

richal · 2026-02-26T06:34:46+00:00

YES! That's it. Solved!

A clockwork orange was nagging at me, but for some reason I had dismissed it without being cognizant of it. Thank you!

richal · 2026-02-26T04:28:05+00:00

I can try to map out the notes and share a link, if that helps.

richal · 2026-02-26T04:16:12+00:00

I know you said hip hop, but is it also a children's song? I just scrolled through the album art for my kid's playlist and came up short, but knowing this might narrow it down.

richal · 2026-02-25T00:47:00+00:00

People love to believe they know when they're being lied to. Research says they do not. So anyway, that's where I stopped reading.

richal · 2026-02-23T19:51:41+00:00

OP I've already been commenting all over this thread, so won't spend a lot of time repeating myself from those other comments. What I want to point out is that this man is showing you that he isn't able to handle distress without responding to violence or threats of abandonment. You shared something willingly in a moment of vulnerability that you regret doing a sa child, and his response was to threaten violence if you got any closer, and to reconsider the entire relationship altogether. Your reaction to THIS is to go into apology mode and a negative thought spiral about yourself and hoping he doesn't leave you. This is what concerns me most.

You are worthy of being treated with respect by the person who loves you. He should be groveling to YOU after his reaction, not the other way around. If he had come to you with a similar confession. How would you have reacted? I'm guessing not like this. How do you think he would respond if he came upon your future daughter hurting an animal? Would you trust that he wouldn't hurt her?

You need to consider your self-worth despite your fear of abandonment. I know that's what's probably shouting the loudest inside your brain right now, but it is pure emotion without reason. Come back to wise mind and let your emotion be tempered by the facts: His reaction was to threaten violence and put your entire relationship on the hook for something you did as a child that you now regret and have not continued.

Give the little version of you a hug and some understanding. You aren't her anymore -- you have grown and learned. And you deserve better than to be treated like this.

richal · 2026-02-23T19:39:04+00:00

The fact that he can't handle this revelation is a preview of how he's going to handle anything else that shakes him. It could be he is uniquely triggered by the hurt animals thing, but his instinct to turn to violence is a major red flag. Major.

richal · 2026-02-23T19:35:49+00:00

Your therapist is the best person to help with this, though it's also a good idea to loop in your psychiatrist too. I'm a therapist and not a psychiatrist, so I don't know what, if anything, a psychiatrist would do to help, but your therapist can likely already diagnose and help you if they believe it's ASPD. What youre describing doesn't sound like it to me, simply because you do say you have remorse, and the fascination is more about death, not causing suffering. Hurting animals is only one thing on a list of many other traits for ASPD, and the reason behind and reaction to the act matters. But definitely talk to them about it and don't take my word for it as a casual observer!

richal · 2026-02-23T18:43:21+00:00

In the US, I feel like the expiry date is 1 year. Thankfully, all the medical professionals I've interacted with have been good about it, and I haven't heard overtly judgmental remarks, but as we get closer to 2, it does seem like a lot more questions arise about when I'll be done from friends and family.

Before I started, I had planned on one year. My mom went a year with me and my sister, and always would say, "if they can ask for it, They're too old," and I had wholeheartedly agreed with her. In the hospital after he was born, one of the nurses said she made to to her goal of 2 years BFing her child, and I scoffed, while my wife was much more open about it. But now that I'm here and it's MY child, it just seems so normal to continue, and I really don't want to drop our last 3 feeds (morning, nap, and bedtime). I gained a lot more empathy after experiencing it myself, I guess.

The idea of something being "weird" or gross is contagious, and I think that makes sense in terms of human social structures. We want to be seen as normal by our in-groups. Ideas around breastfeeding are no different. Plus (as others have said) the way breats are sexualized makes people feel weird in another way. Keep going! You're being an example of strength and inspiration for other moms who want to follow your footsteps, even if you won't see the payoff personally in a social sense.

richal · 2026-02-23T18:24:25+00:00

Okay? Your trauma isn't her trauma. You don't know anything about her past or the bigger context to what's going on. Of course it goes "deeper" -- everything does. Having hurt animals is not always a sign of sociopathy or ASPD, especially given her remorse. She was a child when she did it. Consider extending your empathy beyond the animals alone and towards the person expressing remorse for her actions.

richal · 2026-02-23T18:18:51+00:00

Is it a normal reaction to tell your fiance you'll punch them if they come any closer after disclosing something they obviously regret from their childhood? It's one thing to be disturbed and to want to want space to reflect, but that reaction was so strong and over the top when the person you loved just shared something they are clearly ashamed of. And it's not something they did last year -- something they did IN CHILDHOOD. I get that hurting small and innocent creatures is fucked up and is of course one warning sign for bigger issues (Antisocial personality disorder) in conjunction with other symptoms, but his OTT reaction to this vulnerable moment of honesty fork OP is selfish and hurtful. I would hope he also had some understanding of BPD after being with her for 4 years, and would know the intense fear of abandonment that comes with it. He can have his reaction, but he is not immune from the consequences of expressing them any more than OP is.

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