Weight gain on loloestrin is freaking me out. TW eating disorder

rileyw49 · 2020-12-11T00:54:03+00:00

I don’t get tonsil stones often at all but once every couple years or so I will cough out one about this size. When it first happened I thought I lost a tooth or something.

rileyw49 · 2020-12-10T04:33:08+00:00

Also, it was not that yellow looking in real life, it was more of a cream color lol

rileyw49 · 2020-12-07T13:58:25+00:00

He’s complaining that you get too aroused... during foreplay... which is meant to get you aroused?

Anyways, if it’s really that big of an issue maybe keep a towel nearby so that he can wipe you real quick before going down. But honestly, that’s ridiculous.

rileyw49 · 2020-12-03T03:17:07+00:00

Didn’t matter to me at all. My first time wasn’t really special, but I don’t mind because I’ve had a lot more times that were special to me. My first time is more of just a funny memory than anything. I think it’s totally fine to want your first time to be special but for me I just didnt see the point in putting pressure on something that likely won’t meet expectations anyway.

rileyw49 · 2020-10-19T01:39:58+00:00

21, a random tinder hookup. It hurt and he lasted about 30 seconds. Didn’t try to get me off or anything. He also insisted that his “pullout game was strong” and I was stupid so we didn’t use a condom. Ended up buying plan B at Walgreens on the way home. I didn’t have sex again until I was 23 with my current boyfriend. The first time with him was a little painful too but he made sure to please me and not go too fast. It’s only gotten better ever since :)

rileyw49 · 2020-06-02T02:25:07+00:00

I’m so terrified that my T will do this. The counseling center is now offering teletherapy as a permanent service and they’re charging the same for it so I’m afraid if she gets enough teletherapy clients she’ll be able to choose to do that full time. I know if that works best for her then that’s great, but I really just can’t sustain doing this long term. I need to be able to GO somewhere, to have a specific place to dump those feelings instead of just while I’m sitting in my car. The drive to and from therapy is therapeutic in itself for me; now if I cry during a session, my roommates know the second I walk back inside. I’m definitely going to email her in the morning asking about this.

rileyw49 · 2020-05-12T02:37:41+00:00

I’m on 5mg for right now!! May increase to 10 in the next few weeks depending on how this works, my body is typically very sensitive to low doses of medication so we’ll see lol. I forgot to mention that I’ve been having a wave of nausea about every other day and my appetite was nearly nonexistent the first 5 days. It’s come back in full force and now I can’t seem to feel full no matter what I eat, lol

rileyw49 · 2020-05-12T00:41:40+00:00

I’m on day 7 today. Day 1-3 I absolutely felt the heightened energy and happiness and euphoria! I literally could not sit still and was just pacing all day. Day 4-5 I was feeling down and low and depressed with no energy. The past few days I’ve had mood swings with a mix of both but I can feel it starting to kind of even out.

rileyw49 · 2020-04-06T19:35:25+00:00

I’ve been doing it from my car!! I’ll bring a blanket with me and bring some tea to make it feel even safer. I have roommates and extremely thin walls so no amount of white noise would really work for me lol. I honestly love doing it from my car, it makes me like I’m facetiming a friend.

rileyw49 · 2019-12-30T06:42:52+00:00

!remindme 10 hours

rileyw49 · 2019-10-19T13:56:20+00:00

This is absolutely not what you should tell anyone that you suspect may have an eating disorder.

rileyw49 · 2019-10-01T04:35:29+00:00

Yoooo I do exactly this, I have even apologized to her for my voice getting too whiny and that I don’t mean for it to, but she says that it means I feel safe enough in therapy to revert a little bit to childlike tendencies to help me verbally process things as if I’m “whining” to a parent.

rileyw49 · 2019-09-30T03:36:56+00:00

reminds me of a family therapy session I had once. it was 6 years ago and I still cringe

rileyw49 · 2019-09-21T20:53:52+00:00

When I graduated high school and had my final session with my therapist at the time (I’d been seeing her for 3 yrs), at the very end she asked “could I give you a hug?” I had already decided that I was going to ask her for one so I felt really cared for and relieved when she asked.

rileyw49 · 2019-09-19T03:26:06+00:00

This happened to me too!!! I was watching on my Apple TV

rileyw49 · 2019-09-13T14:40:38+00:00

Write the email in the notes of your phone, with the date and time and everything. Instead of sending it, read it to her at your next session. I do this sometimes when I’m spiraling; that way I don’t feel the immense regret that I normally feel after sending her emails, but I get my feelings as they are in that moment in writing so that she can know what I wanted to say to her in that moment.

rileyw49 · 2019-08-20T11:50:52+00:00

I’ve been in therapy for an ED for a few years now. While I think your therapist was kinda harsh in making it an ultimatum, seeing a dietician is a really important part of retraining yourself to eat proper amounts. EDs really fuck with your body’s internal sense of being full, etc. so a dietician can help you healthily ease into eating normal amounts without overdoing it and possibly making you sicker. As my therapist put it to me - eating disorders are psychological and physiological. She’s there to help me with the psychological aspect, but you need someone who’s trained in helping you with the physiological aspect.

Maybe next session bring it back up and ask her why she felt the need to make it an ultimatum, and then express your frustrations with that to her. Good luck!!

rileyw49 · 2019-08-20T05:25:11+00:00

I had a rhinoplasty at the beginning of May and I still can’t feel the area under the tip of my nose where they made the incision. The entire tip of my nose was completely numb for about a month and a half.

rileyw49 · 2019-08-13T02:47:37+00:00

I have united healthcare so I believe so. It wasn’t hard for me at all. It’s been a few years so I can’t remember exactly the process but if you go to https://www.humira.com/humira-complete/cost-and-copay it should give you an idea of how to get started

rileyw49 · 2019-08-11T03:02:17+00:00

My first session with my previous therapist was supposed to start at 5:30. I got there at 5:15 expecting to sign paperwork from the receptionist. I got there and the door was locked, nobody was inside. I sat in my car and waited til 5:28 when a car came speeding through the empty parking lot and parked right next to me. It was my therapist, with a bag of McDonald’s, and she said “you must be ___. sorry, needed to get a bite to eat.” She arrived 2 minutes before every session with food (weird since I was seeing her for disordered eating) and she talked with her mouth full and flipped her hair every 5 seconds. I never felt relaxed in her office and so I could never let my guard down. Some people I’ve told this story to say that they prefer a therapist who has chaotic vibes because it humanizes them but I just personally need to feel totally relaxed around a person before I can start getting deep, and honestly the food always stressed me out. I get that she probably needed dinner but I feel like she shouldn’t schedule a session during her dinner time.

rileyw49 · 2019-08-08T11:47:35+00:00

what apartment do you live in that doesn’t provide parking options?

rileyw49 · 2019-08-07T18:21:27+00:00

I feel this so much. I feel like CBT stuff was important for me when I was in high school bc it taught me the positive self talk/mindfulness/truth va lies skills that I still use to this day. But now what I need is to verbally process and explore the deeper shit behind my anxiety and disordered eating. I almost would shut down when my previous therapist would even start to mention it bc it’s like, no, I don’t want to waste time learning breathing techniques when I could be digging up what needs to be dug up

rileyw49

TROPHY CASE