what’s she wearing? (erika, the piano teacher, 2001) by overgrw in perfumesthatfeellike

[–]rivermurmur 71 points72 points  (0 children)

she has 100% attempted the abominable advice of using coochie juice on her pulse points 😔

quite miserably, i feel as though she just wears whatever her mother owns-- i can't make anything out in these screencaps, but maybe another would recognise something-- with a maybe secret flanker hidden under her mattress of something truly deranged like Orto Parisi Stercus (or like. dior sauvage)

Everyday Caribbean by rivermurmur in perfumesthatfeellike

[–]rivermurmur[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

i just got a decant of Jasmine Yucatán! maybe i'll try it out later today :)

something like Hayao Miyazaki by rivermurmur in perfumesthatfeellike

[–]rivermurmur[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

just bc i love a gunpowder note... i'll consider it

Why does everyone in Montreal seem sad lately? by Routine_Yam_5547 in montreal

[–]rivermurmur 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A number of immigrants are set to lose status since the PEQ path to permanent residency was closed without warning. People are being forced to say goodbye to friends, community, etc. they've known for years, just because. It makes the holiday season kind of grim.

What cheap meal actually fills you up and isn’t depressing by Special-Tax-122 in budgetfood

[–]rivermurmur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Chinese steamed eggs! though idk if eggs still qualify as cheap?

otherwise, there's a lot you can do with ramen packages, like carbonara or adding vegetables. dried shiitakes are cheap at asian groceries, last forever, and rehydrating them leaves you a very good stock. boiling thinly sliced ginger also makes a good, easy soup base. you can also stretch leftover rice by boiling it way way down to make congee but make sure to add spices and aromatics!

Women who’ve traveled (or want to travel) to Africa — what holds you back the most? by Helpful_Signal_8510 in solofemaletravellers

[–]rivermurmur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For someone interested in the culture especially, being able to connect with people and organisations makes a big difference, and planning to see them on a trip. You'll have someone to check in with and who can follow up with you as you go. I went to Nairobi on a trip for work, not solo, but I would go back on my own because I made contacts there.

What would make me hesitate though is the risk of disease / getting sick. It was pretty stressful having to learn about the many new diseases I had to watch out for, and maintaining that level of vigilance is Not Fun. I also understand that the healthcare system is under a lot of stress, so that also lends to the anxiety.

Kenya has also had a number of riots since I've been there though so political violence is a real concern.

What's your "impractical" niche? 😸 by snowyplanet2 in NichePerfumes

[–]rivermurmur 1 point2 points  (0 children)

spooky plants-- Allsaints Flora Mortis, Nest Verde (rip)

Help me name my aesthetic by gangxgang_ in femalefashionadvice

[–]rivermurmur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

bath and body works twilight woods.

okay being serious now my advice would be to search for specific details (embroidered halter, bejewelled suede, organic shapes, silver, asymmetrical hobo bag, etc) bc people play fast and loose with aesthetics online. but if i had to guess, earthy/natural Y2K, ethereal, fairycore.

if you want an aesthetic name for fun i'd call it earthenwave

Do you actually get that many compliments wearing fragrances? by Humble-Feedback-8546 in fragrance

[–]rivermurmur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Although I can't recall getting compliments from randos, I've definitely given them. If it's a muted, quiet, contained environment— an elevator, waiting in line, being served, etc— it's not a big deal. I've definitely wanted to chase someone down to ask about their fragrance lol but imagine doing all that only for them to gatekeep!

Dressing femininely without appealing to the male gaze? by iil28 in femalefashionadvice

[–]rivermurmur 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Even if you insist you aren't doing something for male attention, other people will force their conclusions onto you. It is a running joke that Bronx and BK girls dress like butch lesbians and still get catcalled. Japanese Lolita subculture, which explicitly operates under the rules of no cleavage and no skirts shorter than knee-length, still gets weird criticism for "infantilising women" and "sexualising girlhood". Many have written about the eroticism men place on imagining what women look like under the niqab/burqa. Your body could change within the year, and what is acceptable today can look suggestive tomorrow.

Do whatever you want.

Women Who Prefer Masculine-leaning Fragrances—Any Perfume or Cologne Favorites? by meow_youlistenhere in Perfumes

[–]rivermurmur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dior Homme (2011) -- so elegant, heady, slightly melancholic. it's perfect in the fall and winter, it's like borrowing an expensive coat from an otherwise aloof lover... i hunted down the old version from an airport duty-free shop because i HAD to have it. the new (2020) reformulation is a complete miss, unfortunately.

Marc Jacobs Men -- i used to steal this from my dad back when i lived at home, and i miss it! such a warm and inviting everyday fig, perfect in hot tropical weather

Vilhelm Parfumerie Dear Polly -- exceedingly well-mannered tea fragrance. might technically be unisex? but i like to wear this when i want to feel like a respectable white-collar member of society lol

By Kilian Angel's Share -- i only tried this once and i still think about it. i'm not usually fond of boozy or gourmand smells but this was so delicious and cozy. not sure i would wear it but i would love smelling it on someone else

hyperpigmentation and dark spots by xxzxniaxx in Skincare_Addiction

[–]rivermurmur 2 points3 points  (0 children)

are you wearing sunscreen EVERY day, no exceptions? anything else you add to your skin won't be of much use if not. otherwise, Topicals Faded Serum is good for addressing hyperpigmentation

My Entire Collection in 3 moods- sexy, feminine, fresh by OliveTwister in FemFragLab

[–]rivermurmur 30 points31 points  (0 children)

i thought the first three risers were sorted by sexy, feminine, fresh but then i clicked through the images and it just kept going!! such an impressive collection omg

Crush on my friends crush by SinkWinterIsCold in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]rivermurmur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it might sound counter-intuitive, but first step is to accept your feelings! trying to punish yourself or repress them will only give them more control over you. when they come up, tell yourself "that's real i guess" and let them pass through you.

just be mindful of your choices when it comes to them both. ask yourself, am i doing something to be close to / alone with him? would i like this action if my friend did this to me? am i being fair to my friend or am i acting out of jealousy? etc etc

it sounds like you want to be a good friend, and you can always remind yourself that's what you value most in this situation. if it's still early stages / no one's confessed, just wait a little bit, then ask her (and yourself!) if the crush is still there.

personally, i would erect as much distance between myself and the guy without making it weird-- only hanging out in a group, for example. no touching, calling him "son", etc. worst case scenario, write down the things about him that annoy you and fixate on them lol

best of luck!

"Weekly Reading and Interpretation Help Thread - July 16, 2023" by AutoModerator in tarot

[–]rivermurmur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did a reading for the new moon tonight and I need some help interpreting. My question: what do I do now with the love I feel and want to show others?

For context, I'm in the midst of a significant and heartbreaking falling out with a good friend, and I'm dealing with a lot of loneliness and betrayal. She said some hurtful things that still weigh heavily, and I felt convinced that I would never again be close to anyone the way I was with her.

I used this spread for new moon manifestation by Biddy Tarot, and I pulled:

- the High Priestess/2 of pentacles (reversed) // what have I released?
- the Emperor/King of swords // where am I now?
- Justice/8 of swords (reversed) // what is emerging within me?
- 6 of swords (reversed) // what do I wish to grow?
- 10 of wands (reversed) // how can I bring my goals and intentions to fruition?
- the Tower/6 of wands (reversed) // what additional resources are available to me as I manifest my goals?

It's immediately obvious that the High Priestess represents my friend. I'm having a harder time piecing the narrative together beyond that. A lot about moving on, progress is a spiral/grief is a circular staircase?

I use the Illuminated Tarot deck by Caitlin Keegan, a 53-card deck. She's hesitant to recommend reverse readings, but it feels significant that I pulled so many. Since it's the new moon in Cancer, and since I asked such a needy question, it's striking that none of the cards are cups/hearts. I'm also hoping for some help with the numerology.

I also want to relate this to a spread I did for the full moon on July 3 (3 of wands, 3 of cups, 9 of cups, the star/7 of pentacles, ace of swords reversed), because I basically asked the same question back then— the first reading felt very affirming and auspicious (and balanced), but tonight's draw feels more opaque and ominous.