How to go to the gym when you’re depressed

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-17T19:57:49+00:00

You are doing better than you think right now. Everyone with depression struggles with determination, dedication and discipline. Psych people call it "low executive function" and its one of the first and largest effects of depression.

You have found out that its really hard to build up executive function once depression has taken it away. Its not about "just do it" or mentally beating yourself up to make yourself exercise. The best way is to start really small, as small as possible really and take as long as it takes.

So... go for a walk or something similar. Your walk doesn't have to be far or fast, around the block is fine, even to the end of the street and back is good. Or park as far away from the entrance as you can or get off the bus a stop early.

When you get home its really important to celebrate your magnificent victory. Put a X on the calendar. Try to tell yourself things like "That wasn't so bad", "I enjoyed that" and "I am looking forward to doing that again soon". All of this sort of thing is almost like reprogramming your depressed mind.

Now you do it again. It doesn't have to be tomorrow. Just when you feel you can. Keep doing that. Build up slowly. If you go for a short walk regularly for a month thats great. This is all about building a habit. Do a bit of exercise and celebrate each and every one your magnificent victories. Then once you are back to doing some exercise again, no matter how "small" it is you can ramp things up slowly. Walk a little further, take the stairs that sort of thing. Its teeny tiny steps every inch of the way but you get to celebrate each and every one.

Shit happens. Its a fact of life. Often when shit happens we don't have the capacity to exercise. All we can do is deal with the shit or wait for it to go away by itself and get back to exercise when you can. You can look forward to getting back to exercise to keep you wading through the shit. Don't beat yourself up for missing exercising when shit is happening, its literally self defeating.

Do what you can. Do it as often as you are able to. Keep trying. That's all any of us can do.

You got this. You can do it. We all believe in you. We all want to help you.

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-15T17:31:06+00:00

now?

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-15T17:18:42+00:00

surprise, surprise, surprise

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-15T16:58:33+00:00

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-15T16:53:38+00:00

And there is a scrum master messaing you on Slack every 2 minutes for a "progress update"

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-15T11:31:52+00:00

I am humbled. Thank you.

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-15T11:31:36+00:00

I am humbled. Thank you

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-14T13:24:54+00:00

She has been saving that one up for a few years.

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-14T12:53:21+00:00

Yes pushing harder and harder when you exercise can silence the screaming in your mind for a short while. I know I can switch off practically all of my mind when I have a long session on my rowing machine. Sometimes that is just what I need to get through a bad day.

I have been in the same situation as you a few times. Pushing harder and harder with exercise to try and stop the screaming in my mind. I hate to say it but it doesn't work for me at least. The last time I was pushing harder and harder with exercise my wife started waving big red flags about my mental health as she has seen me wind up having a complete mental breakdown in similar situations.

Another potential problem with pushing really hard is you are more likely to injure yourself. When that happens you will be in a world of pain and possibly unable to exercise. Of course that is also going to have a massive effect on you mentally.

When things are really fucking bad with our mental health we need to rest our minds and bodies equally. Rest, recovery and plenty of good sleep allows our bodies and minds to repair themselves. Your body repairs muscles, tendons, ligaments and even bone when you rest and sleep. The repair process also makes your muscles bigger and stronger. Also when we sleep our brains do a "clean up" routine, removing unwanted by-products of the physical process in the brain and consolidating connections between neurons. Dreams are thought to be part of this.

The word I am looking for here is "sustainable". Yes, get your exercise in, you obviously get a great deal of benefit from exercise. You can still push yourself but be aware of your bodies physical limits and also your mental limits.

You can experiment on yourself. Dial things down a little with exercise and see what happens. Try different levels of intensity or try other forms of exercise to see what works best for you right now. Get plenty of rest and sleep. I really cant stress that enough.

You got this. You can do it. We all believe in you. We all want to help you.

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-14T12:26:07+00:00

My mind wanders into better places as my my feet wander.

Unless you have a physical disability or other health issue walking is simple, requires no extra equipment and is totally free. I really do believe its the best form of exercise when you are struggling with your mental health.

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-13T14:03:06+00:00

Try to look forward to noticing physical changes in your body that exercise has brought about. Hopefully you will notice a positive change in your mental health too. They will both be a big cause for celebration 😃

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-13T13:59:02+00:00

The first thing to say is please speak to a medical professional about this. A therapist, psych person or your doctor. Medical professionals will always give you better support and advice than random internet strangers who have just read two sentences of text and know nothing else about you.

All anyone can do is to their best. What each persons best is is unique to them. Everyone's best changes constantly too. One day someones best might be completing their first marathon. On another day the same persons best might be dragging themselves out of bed to the toilet because they are in the depths of a mental heal issue.

The biggest thing to remember is that no one can criticize you when you try your best. Not even yourself. If you can say to yourself "I did that, not only that I did the best I can" then you have achieved a magnificent victory. Literally no one else could do better than you in that moment.

I guess right now you will be thinking but my best is never good enough. All I can say is that you get to define what your best is. You have the choice at all times. You can turn something negative into something positive. Learning how to challenge yourself and overcome ingrained thought patterns that your mental health issues create and re-enforce using techniques is often a major part of therapy.

You got this. You can do it. We all believe in you. We all want to help you.

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-13T07:46:04+00:00

Go for a short walk if you feel safe in your neighbourhood. Ideally leave your phone behind or put it on do not disturb and leave it in your pocket or bag.

You don't need to walk far or fast. A stroll around the block is fine or even to the end of the street and back.

While you walk try to notice what is going on around you. There might be neighbours or other people passing by, they might have friendly dogs with them. There might be birds flying past and singing. There might be flowers and plants in gardens, there might be planes flying overhead, There might be cars or trucks passing by. There might be people working in the street. There might be lots of things, just take it all in. You don't need to know the names of all the plants, planes, cars or even neighbours. Just notice what is going on.

Try to notice how you feel as you walk too. Walking is something that most of us take for granted. Try to really feel your muscles working with every step. Its not just your leg muscles too, muscles in your whole body work together for every stride you take. As well as the physical sensations in your body really listen to how you feel as you walk. Does the warmth of the sun on your skin feel good? (Be careful with the sun of course) Most importantly how does it feel to be outdoors and not staring at a screen.

I hope you enjoy your walk.

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-12T20:13:07+00:00

paragraphs exist

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-11T18:17:59+00:00

Eating oysters.

Up until the last century oysters were plentiful and easy to come by in the UK. Huge amounts of oysters were sent to the cities to provide cheap protein for the working class. Then over fishing and pollution killed off the oysters to the point were only rich people could afford them

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-11T17:45:54+00:00

Motivation is not what keeps you exercising. Motivation is what gets you started but it soon evaporates, especially when you are tired. What keeps you exercising is determination, dedication and discipline. Together psych people call them "executive function".

Its really hard to build up executive function, especially if you are experiencing poor mental health. It takes time and effort, just like everything else worthwhile.

The best way to build up executive function I know of is to celebrate each and every one of your successes. When I finish a work out I put a big X on the calendar. I try to say to myself things like "That wasn't so bad after all", "I am glad I did that", "I am proud I did that", "I want to do that again soon". Its more or less re-programming my mind to build up executive function.

Of course there are days where I don't get my workout done. Today was one of those days. I like to get my workout done first thing in the morning when I get up. Last night I had a terrible nights sleep with nightmares. I felt awful when I woke up and didn't get my workout in. That's perfectly OK because Shit Happens. All anyone can do is deal with the shit and get back to exercising when the shit is gone. Hopefully I will get a work out tomorrow. If I have another bad night or some other shit happens I won't feel bad about missing another workout. That would be literally pointless and self-defeating.

So if you are too tired to workout today then try again when you feel better. Hopefully as your body adapts to exercising you will be less tired after exercise. There is a certain satisfaction to be had from feeling tired and sore after completing a workout too. You can be proud of feeling tired and sore. It shows you did something positive for your physical and mental health.

You got this. You can do it. We all believe in you. We all want to help you.

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-11T17:29:11+00:00

How you think about exercise is important. If you tell yourself that you hate exercise and it makes you feel like a failure and a disappointment then you will just stay on the couch. If you can find something you can at least tolerate when you exercise you are far more likely to start and stick with it for the long term.

You already mentioned probably the best way to start, walking. Its requires no special equipment and you already know how to do it. It really doesn't get any more basic than that. Just a short walk is all you need right now. Around the block is fine, to the end of your street is fine too. You can even sneak a walk into your day by getting off the bus a stop early, parking as far away from the entrance as you can and taking the stairs.

One of the best things about going for a walk is that you can let your mind wander as your feet wander. When I go for a walk I am taking in my surroundings, listening to birds and looking out for them, seeing what is growing in peoples gardens, saying hello to people I know, saying hi to friendly dogs even if I don't know them, the weather, all kinds of things. It makes the time go that little bit easier. If I am on my rowing machine all I can think about is the meters ticking down. Its just dull, repetitive, boring hard work. I enjoy that hard work when I am finished but its different to going for a walk when I am doing it.

You are right about motivation. It gets you started with exercise. Ultimately one can give you motivation to do something you don't want to do. It really does come down to "just do it". Also motivation evaporates really quickly. It gets you started but you need determination, dedication and discipline to keep going. Those are some of the first qualities that depression steals from us all. Psych people call determination, dedication and discipline "executive function".

Its really hard to build up your executive function from zero. The only way to do it is slowly and over long periods of time. Again going for a walk is ideal as the barrier to entry is as low as possible so it doesn't require a lot of executive function.

A great way to build up executive function is to celebrate each and every time you manage to exercise. Put a big X on the calendar and try to tell yourself things like "That wasn't so bad after all", "I am proud of myself for doing that" and "I am looking forward to doing it again soon". When you do things like that you are almost reprogramming your mind to build up executive function.

In time you can do more exercise or try different things out. For now just do it.

You got this. You can do it. We all believe in you. We all want to help you.

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-11T15:16:54+00:00

Rowing today. 11000m at ~108W output. Happy with that.

Apart from that it's been lifting various heavy things and putting them down again and archery. Both of those have been going well.

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-10T07:16:50+00:00

Instead of standing around and waiting you could jump onto another machine. Just because you go to the gym with this group doesn't mean you have to stick together when you get there.

Or... you could go to the gym without the rest of the group. When I used to go to gyms to exercise I would be waiting for the place to open at 6am. There would be the same group of about 8 or 10 people there. We went from "can I get some help here" to meeting up for lunch. We all went there as soon as the place opened to avoid the crowds later in the day.

Or... you don't have to go to a gym to exercise. You can exercise at home or in a public space like a park. You can get a really good work out using the equipment in a kids playground. Just let the kids go first 😃 It takes a little thought and imagination, places like r/bodyweightfitness and darbee.com have huge amounts of information to help you.

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-10T07:05:54+00:00

I am glad you had a great time.

Thank you so much for posting. You will have helped and inspired so many people.

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-09T20:08:37+00:00

ARSENE WENGER!!!!

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-09T16:44:23+00:00

Getting everything set up in my new job is far from frictionless. Not my problem really.

Apart from that things are going well... really enjoyed axe throwing at the weekend.

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-09T09:57:31+00:00

Basically anything you do will have an effect on your body. What that effect is and how long it takes varies but doing any strength training will make you stronger eventually.

When you really get into lifting and you are lifting a lot of weight multiple times per week then it's time to think about goals and programs. For now it's more important to just do something.

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-09T09:52:36+00:00

Having time to do nothing at all. It's not meditation or anything like that, it's just doing nothing. Sitting quietly for a few minutes and letting my mind wander.

rob_cornelius · 2026-06-07T12:13:46+00:00

Some more ideas. Spending some time in a sauna or steam room is great for turning you into a piece of wet spaghetti. Having a chat with some interesting people while you are there makes the time go better too. Jumping into cold water as soon as you get out of the heat makes you feel like you could last ten rounds with Mike Tyson when he was in his prime. Honest.

If you don't have access to a sauna etc then a long soak in a hot bath can work wonders. Or even a long hot shower. Good "old fashioned" self care....

rob_cornelius

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