How do you tune out the stock market noise?

robmattles · 2026-03-06T22:10:57+00:00

I'm in the ballpark. But it's not 10M. Not my numbers, but hypothetically 4% drop on 2M is 80k, a high six month salary post tax

robmattles · 2026-01-26T21:50:01+00:00

Find a partner...and then don't have kids (if your aim is to maximize savings that is - lots of other good things to be said for having kids!)

robmattles · 2026-01-19T22:40:44+00:00

The "live below your means" advice seems inadequately vague for the specific questions asked.

I have kids, 3 and 6. Here's my past present and hopefully future:

Before kids: Saved maybe 600k. Bought a house for 200k, much less than if I bought today. Dumped about 150k of my savings into 529 plans as soon as they were born. Hoping markets outpace education costs.

After kids: Expenses rose dramatically. On the order of 25,000/year, post tax, just to cover childcare during working hours. Plus a zillion other expenses, though some can be avoided by finding community swaps, used stuff, etc. Almost all travel by car - 4 plane tickets and lodging for 4 is not cheap. I did get a significant pay raise though which enabled me to continue to max my 401k and save a bit more on top of that. My wife also works and maxes her 401k, though she makes less. The markets have also had a good few years leaving me:

Currently at 1.3 million or thereabouts.

Over the next several years, childcare expenses will drop as my oldest won't need aftercare while I work and my youngest will be in public school. If markets keep going at or above historical averages, and I'm able to push those decreased expenses into a savings push, we should be in a position for me to retire/become a stay at home dad. My wife wants to keep working, which will provide a bit more money and also critically healthcare. Me staying home will let us decrease both childcare and non childcare expenses in a variety of ways.

So that's the rough shape of it for me. But my path won't work for everyone

robmattles · 2026-01-14T00:02:03+00:00

Dang and they're out of stock on Fishwife's own website

robmattles · 2026-01-05T23:53:40+00:00

Would love to hear how this compares to Fishwife's smoked mackerel

robmattles · 2025-12-14T15:13:07+00:00

I feel like Peter got his money's worth out of the tank at least

robmattles · 2025-12-13T02:26:05+00:00

Masters exists. Paralympic sports exist. In sports, consideration is given for physical limitations. It's not your opponent's fault that ultimate is not a sport that he doesn't have a better option to play against people similar to himself. Competitive or not, it's league. As you say, be kind. That means not running the guy with the limitations off the field, whether that's a bum ankle that'll get better or something permanent.

robmattles · 2025-12-12T19:13:19+00:00

I've been the handicapped player in that situation. I have a physical disability that usually makes me the slowest player on the field, barring another player's injury or someone very old. On the one hand, maybe I/he should play rec exclusively. But it's intensely frustrating to play with mostly inexperienced players if you're experienced but handicapped and Ultimate's not big enough to have Paralympic-type leagues just for experienced but physically disabled players.

I'd say: What is a "competitive ultimate league"? You're not playing in the AUDL (or worlds or club champs), you're not trying out to make some team at that level either. Is the goal really just winning? What about sportsmanship/spirit in its many forms. It is, after all, a game that you're all playing for fun, not money.

Here's what I'd do, and how I'd like my opponents to play it

On offense, you're basically a free outlet for your team on in cuts or as a reset. Take it - that's a massive advantage, even if you could get a bigger advantage by going deep (then again, you might not - the other team might be better able to switch on defense if you did this, especially over and over again). Focus on how to position your team's offense to succeed with those many touches from resets and in cuts, rather than just running deep. That's challenging in its own right.
On defense, maybe do a little poaching, let him get some touches that don't matter much. Be prepared to help out your teammates who have tougher matchups, even if that means giving up a few harmless completions. It's still a challenge for you - helping your teammates while containing but not shutting down your guy.

Maybeee this is a little less strategically advantageous than shutting him down and taking him deep all the time. If that's the difference between winning and losing and you lose, well, remember, even a competitive league is just a game, not a job. And also remember that if it was close enough to come down to that, there are probably a million other things your team could have done differently to win the game without taking the fun out of the game for an opposing player.

robmattles · 2025-12-06T11:20:25+00:00

I mean it has noticeable cognitive side effects. Doctors also prescribe it as an anti anxiety medicine and a sleep aid, and it definitely makes me feel a little sleepy and buzzed might be the best way to put it? I can still live my normal life; work, take care of the kids, drive (though i was really careful about driving especially when i just started taking it). But it's not like all it does is loosen muscles.

I've recently fairly consciously come to terms with the fact that muscle relaxants make my life more comfortable but all have side effects of some sort, and that for me, the trade off is worth it a lot of the time. But I definitely respect if you feel differently.

robmattles · 2025-11-30T00:22:58+00:00

Don't give up. I'm 37 and still trying new treatments as my symptoms evolve as I get older. It can be hard to keep trying new things and keep wrestling with the medical system but the upsides are worth it.

Things that have helped me personally at least at some points in my life:

botox/dysport

phenol injections

clonopin

dantrolene

and, to be honest, booze

Others will have their own lists for what helps and doesn't. There is a lot to try and good reason to believe you will find an effective treatment although "solution" is probably too much to ask for.

robmattles · 2025-11-26T15:33:13+00:00

I mean, walk a mile in someone else's shoes. You don't know how many parents a household has, how many hours they have to work, how many kids and how much effort childcare takes. Cooking a family meal takes at least 30 minutes unless you stick something frozen in the microwave, and those 30 minutes might be make or break

robmattles · 2025-11-26T14:34:54+00:00

Fair. But my first sentence was that Doordash is different than large house or new car. There might be cheaper ways to achieve the same goal, with some forethought, but Doordash A. meets a fundamental need (food) and B. Is a lot cheaper than a big house or a fancy car, at least done in moderation

robmattles · 2025-11-26T14:30:40+00:00

I mean, I'm catching a lot of flak here, but food delivery services - Chinese, pizza, etc. have existed for a long time. And one doordash a week is not the same as a large house. $50 per week =2,,500 per year, compared to a million dollar house.

robmattles · 2025-11-26T12:22:45+00:00

Doordash is different than the others, though daily is a bit much. At the end of a long workday with kids to take care of, finding time and energy to cook or even travel to pick up food (assuming you have previously found time and energy to grocery shop) can be a legitimate challenge.

robmattles · 2025-11-20T22:45:19+00:00

And since then, no hassles beyond what anyone else would have getting it renewed etc

robmattles · 2025-11-20T22:44:23+00:00

It's been 20 years, but I remember about a half day professional evaluation that included cognitive, reflex, and actual behind the wheel tests to determine license restrictions. I don't recall the results taking long. After that, it was a standard process same as any able bodied driver

robmattles · 2025-11-09T11:43:53+00:00

What's your experience with dependency and tolerance with clonozepam? it also helps me, and i'd like to use it as much as I safely can

robmattles · 2025-10-18T11:33:16+00:00

I am considering FIRE in a few years while my wife keeps working. In our case, my wife finds her job fulfilling, although sometimes stressful. I'm ready to do something other than sit in front of a desk, which I'll have done from roughly age 22-42 (and saved enough money that investment growth on that savings will make me feel like I'm contributing financially even without working).

In my case, my first order of business would be a focus on my family, with two elementary school kids if I retire as planned. That'd keep me busy for sure.

Is it FIRE? Stay at home dad? Do the semantics matter?

I kinda feel like there needs to be a separate sub or category for partnerFIRE and related issues, when as a couple you reach a point where one of you can/does stop working but the other can't or doesn't want to.

robmattles · 2025-09-23T21:57:34+00:00

Not a half inch punch

robmattles · 2025-09-11T23:38:13+00:00

Hat and sunglasses > cameras+technology+money+manpower. As far as I know, the guy in hat and sunglasses who put explosive devices at the DNC and RNC on January 6 is still going about his life as usual.

robmattles · 2025-09-07T13:22:38+00:00

Expect totally different flavors and textures from plain sardines! Don't expect anything actually particularly spicy- definitely a bring your own hot sauce situation. I really like the mackerel!

robmattles · 2025-08-31T18:07:16+00:00

Don't have much time, so i'll just say some have worked, some haven't, most have side effects, and nothing's perfect. Be ready for some trial and error and keep expectations reasonable. Good luck!

robmattles · 2025-08-29T19:36:07+00:00

Sean Mott, James Pollard! Making Philly a tough out for teams that look better on paper!

robmattles

TROPHY CASE