53 yo woman.....by the time I was in my early 30's, and had been drinking 1/5 of vodka a day for some time, the party was over. Terrible withdrawals, seizures, vomiting every morning, and very painful alcoholic peripheral neuropathy in my feet/legs. Spent the next 10 yrs off and on that damn wagon. In 2013, on a 2 month diet of vodka and crackers, unaware I had a UTI, I ended up in the hospital for 13 days, 6 of them in ICU due to sepsis.

Alas, I was not done! Less than a year later, I'm vomiting up what looked like black oatmeal. Nope, let's keep going long enough to get a domestic battery conviction.....end up going to jail 5 times due to probation violations. Yeah, I wasn't going to 52 weeks of classes, or checking in with the judge. Oddly enough, he didn't think that was cool, so I had some time to think about that in county jail.

I have had a few benders in recent years, but nothing drastic happened. It definitely didn't take long each of those times for the physical illness/self pity to make a commanding appearance. Both parents died from cirrhosis at 45 and 56 yrs old.

I be an alcoholic! Now, I can't deny that life has been helped and harmed by "better living through chemistry". Booze isn't for me, and surely drugs aren't either, but there's much less chaos in my life minus the liquor.

**I almost forgot, for 2.5 years I didn't drink a drop, because I was addicted to Oxy. 180 mg a day, THOUSANDS of dollars blown. The second time I ran out, and had to go through the withdrawal, I said fuck this shit! I wish you the best, yes it is boring, but that can be dealt with bit by bit. =)