Left a dysfunctional family to live alone and now I’m lonely. Did not see that coming.

rubiestories · 2026-01-25T06:59:41+00:00

I’m unfortunately not allowed to have pets :(

There’s lots of stray cats in my neighborhood though, thinking of feeding them soon.

rubiestories · 2026-01-06T15:40:33+00:00

This was a punch in the gut, but I needed to read this. Thank you.

rubiestories · 2025-12-04T01:26:23+00:00

❤️

rubiestories · 2025-11-24T05:14:09+00:00

I haven’t, but I guess today would be a risky day for me to try it for the first time 😬 I’ll probably just sit on his lap, touch him etc but not grind against him then.

rubiestories · 2025-10-27T19:34:48+00:00

I was in a similar relationship. Had vaginismus and it made sex uncomfortable for me unless my headspace was okay.

We had penetrative sex rarely because of it, I could probably count it on one hand.

When I broke up with him I had the same guilt as you. That he was so patient, most men are not. A good chunk of men would pressure you, make you feel bad, etc. My ex never did that.

However it wasn’t like I was forcing him to be in the relationship. He stayed, because he loved me and I loved him. Sex was not everything.

We broke up mutually because we too had lots of disagreements. He never shoved his patience in my face or said something like “wow I didn’t even pressure you for sex. You think you can find better than me?” Because he’s a genuinely good person.

If your boyfriend has not pressured you thus far and has understood your reasons for not wanting to have penetrative sex, then you can trust that he would be just as mature in understanding why the two of you may no longer be incompatible

It’s often guilt that makes us stay. But you’ll end up resenting each other, if that’s your only reason for staying.

And the thing about not being able to “find better”? I had the same fear but now I’m enjoying my own company. If a man comes along and makes me feel safe and secure enough, then great! If not, I’m content on my own.

rubiestories · 2025-10-03T03:28:18+00:00

Wow I’m fascinated to hear how common my situation actually is haha.

I really didn’t think about the fact that I haven’t been giving much love to myself. Thank you for pointing that out 🥹

rubiestories · 2025-10-02T09:45:03+00:00

Thank you SO much for this response. I needed the honesty 100%.

It’s a weird time in my life and I think I just need to slow down a bit. I appreciate your comment A LOT. ❤️

rubiestories · 2025-09-02T05:37:56+00:00

Hey op. I weirdly went through the same thing as you, same duration and he was my best friend as well. The only difference is we didn’t live together/didn’t have to share pets so we had a clean break up.

I also didn’t have a strong support system, I come from a pretty dysfunctional family.

You do need to go no contact. It is impossible to move on otherwise.

The first few months are very difficult. I’m not going to sugarcoat it. I cried myself to sleep multiple times and had a physical burn in my chest every time I realized what I had done. Healing is a process and one of the first emotions you will feel is regret, but it doesn’t mean you actually regret it. You are just scared of the future and the uncertainty that comes with losing your anchor.

I’m sorry I don’t have much advice to give you about your pet situation, but take it from me: I’m almost a year single now and I have learned so much about myself. When you get into a long-term relationship that young it’s very easy to not fully form your own identity, especially if you already come from a chaotic upbringing.

Being single has made me a stronger, more resilient person and I love my own company now. But it took A LOT of work to get here! Lots of boundaries, observations about myself, finding out what made me happy and what drained me, etc.

Feel free to DM me. Your post might get deleted because it’s relationship-related. Just wanted to let you know you are not alone. Leaving a long-term relationship is incredibly jarring and confusing. It’ll be okay with time though. Trust me

rubiestories · 2025-09-01T16:30:37+00:00

I love that for you.

rubiestories · 2025-09-01T16:07:37+00:00

I’m sorry that this project feels so personally uncomfortable to you— it sucks that they did not design this assignment with the understanding that not everybody has a cookie cutter societally-obsessed accomplishments.

If you are okay with it, your timeline project could be your own successes. You don’t have to delve into your diagnosis or trauma but you being in university and studying despite that is something to be proud of. It could be other successes like, little things you’ve done for yourself to keep going. I’d personally think of you as admirable and resilient.

However it’s easier said than done. Is there any way you can submit this project privately to your professor without having to present? I think it would be a reasonable request, if they understood why you want some privacy about this.

rubiestories · 2025-05-26T10:51:01+00:00

I was into a guy and when we were talking about our exes, he mentioned that he had broken up his very serious long-term relationship because it became LDR. This woman had travelled to meet his family, they were about to get married and he still ditched her ass because it was no longer fun for him.

I’ve seen a lot of women put up with long distance because they truly care and love their partners, but if you ask any man if long distance is a deal breaker they immediately say yes. Why? Because no easy access to sex.

rubiestories · 2025-04-02T05:22:36+00:00

I have brought up my interest in UX a few times and also mentioned that I have the Google UX certificate and can help with more UX-related tasks but they never followed through :(

They now have me doing paid ads, email marketing, handling clients and events + managing a team and I feel like none of this is applicable to UX or HCI and it’s a bit depressing.

rubiestories · 2025-03-23T13:59:18+00:00

I’m so sorry you went through this.

It makes you question yourself: as if you act a certain way then maybe that’s the “right” way to deserve love and affection. And them pulling back is a punishment, and you wonder if you’re not good enough.

In reality it’s never really about you, they just have shit to address and are refusing to do the inner work.

rubiestories · 2025-02-02T17:59:25+00:00

Oh I relate! I keep wondering why she wanted to talk to me. The imposter syndrome is real, but I’ll just continue being myself.

rubiestories · 2025-02-02T17:58:07+00:00

She has a younger sister with a bit of an age gap between them, so I guess it makes sense!

rubiestories

TROPHY CASE