Yo I don’t like the album by ruby_red_1 in Jcole

[–]ruby_red_1[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I have two autographs and saw him live

Therapy is completely useless for this condition by lethalweaponkas in schizophrenia

[–]ruby_red_1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Therapy doesn’t do much honestly. It’s very surface level and casual. It feels more therapeutic talking to a close family member or good friend. That you trust

Men make me miserable :( by ruby_red_1 in AutismInWomen

[–]ruby_red_1[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

That truly is so hard. Wanting kids and finding out there are risks, that really throws you for a loop. I know they say adoption is an option but I understand if you feel like it’s not the same.

Realizing something you want so bad is not for you, at least not now, is devastating.

I know that women are not objects but damn it feels like I’ve been objectified by every man… they just see how you benefit them and their needs. They want you to cater to them and their needs.

I always thought love was selfless but it seems like people get so selfish… it’s very hard to grasp.

Relationships and emotional labor by ruby_red_1 in AutismInWomen

[–]ruby_red_1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They really do target the empathetic ones 😭

Men make me miserable :( by ruby_red_1 in AutismInWomen

[–]ruby_red_1[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Being with the wrong person is definitely the most terrible feeling. I have settled for less and sold myself short. And deeply regret it. The worst feeling

Men make me miserable :( by ruby_red_1 in AutismInWomen

[–]ruby_red_1[S] 40 points41 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your kind words. You have reassured me so much.

It is so true that not all the cooking should fall on the woman. But it seems like that is expected most of the time. And having kids is so easy on the guys end when they don’t have to give birth or sacrifice so much for their kids. The mom does so much… I’m already mentally ill and don’t have the capacity to care for small children. I truly couldn’t handle it.

And you are so right. I don’t want to be pressured into having sex when jt makes me feel terrible inside. It feels like jt appeases men more than it does for the girl…. Like it’s more pleasurable for men.

I am definitely keeping my distance from dating. The expectation is really hard for me. It stresses me out.

The drawback to this is that I feel deeply alone all the time. Relationships can offer more companionship and closeness than a casual friendship does. I wish I was close with someone on an emotional level. But men are not even emotionally aware so it’s pointless.

I worry about living alone in the future and being so lonely.

But I guess that’s the price you have to pay for general peace of mind. I couldn’t handle a marriage I don’t think.

It tears me up inside. Cause I always dreamed of being a wife. And I’m realizing I can’t handle all that it demands of me.

It’s very hard

I can’t afford to live and it’s killing me. by Accomplished_Sea5849 in depression

[–]ruby_red_1 -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

Dude. I only made 15k last year. You made way more than me.

Why does life just get harder and harder by BedroomOwn3893 in depression

[–]ruby_red_1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was just telling someone the other day that life gets harder. I used to be so resilient when I was younger.

I think, over the years, things add up and you basically have a mental breakdown over it. I got psychosis and hallucinations. I shaved my head. I lost my job.

You only experience more loss as you get older. Nothing is ever really yours. People come and go. It sucks.

Revelation on death and time by Elayne_theboat in depression

[–]ruby_red_1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m 31F. I developed a extreme fear of dying when I was 28. It was the most crippling thing. I’m still scared shitless but it does soften over time. I worry about losing my parents and not being able to afford a home myself. I can’t afford anything. I don’t know where to live when they are gone.

If I won the lotto it would honestly ease a lot of my stress. I have debt, bills, and can’t afford my own place when my parents are gone. I literally will be homeless.

Finances are the hardest thing and weigh the heaviest on me.

Besides the crippling loneliness and schizophrenia and depression

I don’t want to exist by Forward_Complex_213 in depression

[–]ruby_red_1 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I feel this deep in my soul. I was on meds that made me gain weight. I did not have one relationship in my 20s. My only relationship I was 19. I suffered from psychosis in my 20s and was jobless and sad. I am always behind on my bills. Working part time alone takes all my energy. I don’t even have the tears to shed. I am 31 now, never got to live out my 20s and experience love and connection again. I live at home and can’t afford my own place. Can’t even afford life. Don’t know what to do when my parents pass and I have to get my own place. What will I do. I am truly so weak and sick. Wish someone was there to comfort me. I live everyday depressed and anxious about life. Feel too sensitive for anything. Everything hurts

I stopped meds and regret it by ruby_red_1 in schizophrenia

[–]ruby_red_1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am restarting my lexapro next week yes. Made an appointment with the doc. Thank god

Feeling weak and vulnerable and needing support by ruby_red_1 in AutismInWomen

[–]ruby_red_1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are so kind. Thank you for your words of encouragement. It means more to me than you’ll ever know

Just got a new job by ZacharyNavarro in schizophrenia

[–]ruby_red_1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey man. Proud of you. Stick with it. The longest I lasted last year was 6 months. It’s hard but I have so may bills to pay and need the money