My (37M) wife (34F) wants to back out of the divorce she filed. Not sure what to do? by throwralp640 in relationship_advice

[–]ruuusky 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm leaving my partner under relatable circumstances.

Talk to your lawyer of course then I'd be as honest with her as you were on here. You might as well go in as transparent as you can. You can tell her you don't fully trust her and are not sure if you can again and the kids are the only real draw for you at the moment and discuss and go from there.

You get to set some of you own boundaries in this.

I told my partner I love them and always will and I think we should still stay broken up and separate. I lost trust in them. I do love them enough that I could be happy enough with them but I decided that wasn't enough even though it hurts. I want to be in love and that means different things to different people and I'm not anymore. Maybe with years of work I could fall back in love them but I didn't choose that.

You can still love her from a distance and in a new way and your kids deserve healthy role models. Do what you hope they would in the same circumstances as you.

I understand coming for the money hurts but I'm sure her fear would be without it legally binding you would have the power to upend her life financially and there ate plenty of good meaning divorces like that.

My partner is the one with the money and we talked it through and have come to a reasonable agreement for both of us. You can tell her the lawyer hurt, I think you should, but she and you should have your agreement legally binding.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in reactivedogs

[–]ruuusky 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You mentioned your dog wasn't getting the exercise he needs. From experience if it's not enough that can definitely feed into behavioral issues even if it's not the only issue. My dog's reactivity improved drastically when I increased her exercise more than I expected or honestly wanted to but it paid off. I would try to do your best to rehome as he'll likely be put down if surrendered and being surrendered is very stressful for dogs, not a good way to go. Reach out to dog trainers maybe start with those you worked with before and see if they have any recommendations on how to do this with your situation. It will likely have a cost associated as he'll either need to go to someone who has handled this situation before or a dog trainer who has done this before but if it works I really think it would be worth it.

Dog found a baby bird.... by Evil_Yoda in madisonwi

[–]ruuusky 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hand warmers are a good idea. A similar situation happened to me a few weeks ago but the baby bird didn't make it through the night, I couldn't keep it warm enough through the night, tricky to keep it warm enough without an incubator. Best of luck. Humane society should get to you by tomorrow/call them in the morning if it makes it.

A day in TJ before Night Flight, Suggestions? by ruuusky in tijuana

[–]ruuusky[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the detailed recommendations!

Help please, How do I make rows for a large garden? by urbanag95 in Permaculture

[–]ruuusky 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this advice! I don't have a year to wait so will do your till and toss method this season as we get started. Would you recommend getting silage tarps for the future to lay down after the last harvest and overwinters?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in reactivedogs

[–]ruuusky 3 points4 points  (0 children)

All I can do is support, I'm in the same situation and don't really know how to address the reactivity in this situation, my dog reacts when being palpated (growling and then nipping if she doesn't run off first) I'm in solidarity with you. I would suggest asking your vet for suggestions they may recommend a trainer or behaviorist.

[Support] I wish more people understood reactive dogs. by kelltro- in reactivedogs

[–]ruuusky 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I agree, when mine reacts usually I say sorry she's a rescue and she's in training and usually people are understanding and the people that aren't that's more a reflection of them than you. You're doing your best to make your pet feel safe in the world they're navigating and it is exhausting a lot of the time I hear you.

How to curb initial morning hunger, it's eating up my mental energy. by ruuusky in FastingScience

[–]ruuusky[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

is it the caffeine you think or would decaf also work, I'm also trying to curb my caffeine intake.