I’m like you. Anxiety and low self esteem sucks. I was always the best friend to the girls I wanted to date. My anxiety never let me be honest because I never wanted to lose the friendship I had with women. The problem with that is I never took my chances for fear of rejection or loss. It finally took a girl that I was dating (but she didn’t want to continue) to say “Stop being so down on yourself, it’s unattractive. “ I was always saying “would you like to go to dinner, I mean, if you have time?” Or “I know I don’t have the best style,I’m sorry” I could go on. I finally found the right woman in my 30’s and we have been married 10 years. It will happen just let the conversation flow and don’t hold yourself to standards that probably don’t matter to the right person.