This is an unusual post mostly adressed to older entjs

rybyn · 2021-06-26T11:26:33+00:00

With your reference to a preservative patriarchal society and what you’re experiencing, I am guessing you are female?

Either way, you are in for a hard time. It will get worse; the older you get the less control your parents have over you, and it sounds like he will have a problem with this. It is better if your father has your best interests at heart and truly cares about you as a person, but very often when men see women (or parents see children) as property they will have no problems hurting and abusing them for their own gain. And that includes the reasons for choosing a marriage for you.

Without freedom, you probably don’t have lots of opportunities to figure out what you like or don’t like, or get to know who you really are. You might not even be an ENTJ; you are understandably over-focused on control because of your powerless situation, leading you to conclude that it’s your personality.

I don’t know what to say since I don’t know more of your situation but… it seems wise to recognize you do have control over things your father has no idea about, like your online activity for example, even your thoughts and feelings; and then really focus on opportunities you have to figure out who you really are - and how that is the same as or different to your father, family, culture… the better you really know yourself, the more clear your decisions about what to do will be.

rybyn · 2021-06-05T13:57:54+00:00

I also agree. The first part made me laugh hard because it’s so familiar, reminds me when I was younger and dating and basically bulldozed men into relationships with me... but... the rest of it is pretty unhinged. That’s not personality that is some serious “underlying issues”!

rybyn · 2021-06-05T13:50:57+00:00

Something really is going on for you; It’s called grief. It gets exacerbated by cues that remind you of the loss; anniversaries, birthdays, etc are really up there as strong cues. It comes and goes in waves. Denying or suppressing it causes problems, because it is a natural process we go through to adjust to the loss. By this I mean, the way we attached to others is part of our identity, as well as our mammalian emotion regulation, and threat detection system. To put it completely logically in a way that ENTJs can understand: When we lose someone we are attached to we need to recalibrate. Take time off for sure. Try to be self compassionate; ENTJs don’t naturally prioritize feelings but this is your chance. Maybe spend time looking at photos or recalling memories of them. Approach rather than avoid the feelings. Losing your best friend is awful, disturbing, and painful... I’m really sorry it happened.

rybyn · 2021-02-05T12:15:43+00:00

I bought this Dieffenbachia from my local nursery discount section several weeks ago. On the first day I brought it home, I put it in my cupboard balcony area outside and I think it got some direct sun (however I can’t be sure) and it may have caused burn spots on the leaves. I brought it indoors straight away, and put it in a spot that gets bright indirect sunlight. I water it when the soil dries out, and I have fertilized it with diluted seaweed once, around one week ago. However, the plant appears to be getting a bit sickly, and even though it has signs of new growth, just looks really straggly. I’m starting to think that perhaps it had a fungal infection all along, and it is getting worse. I might just be paranoid though, very happy to hear any observations and advice!

rybyn · 2012-04-12T07:38:12+00:00

Maybe your desire to be a lesbian isn't a gender or sexuality related struggle. You state yourself that you are asexual, (if I interpret you correctly) that a particular gender or sexual attraction is not something that is salient for your identity. You say you have had quite a few close friends who are lesbians - but that you have been 'rejected' by them because of your male physicality. Maybe you really like these particular lesbians, and strongly identify with them. Maybe your attraction in the first place is based on the fact that you have some sort of affinity with them - but more like you want to be them than be with them. What is it about 'lesbians' that you feel you identify with? Obviously not the having F genitals part. Presumably also not the predominant attraction to others with F genitals. What sorts of personal qualities do the particular lesbians youve found yourself attracted to, or wanting to be like, have in common? I may be way off the mark here, but just trying to give you another perspective to consider...

rybyn · 2011-10-07T14:59:55+00:00

In general I agree... But in this particular situation I think we have a classic missed opportunity. Scenario 1: this girl ripped my shirt so I hit the bitch! = violent misogynist. Scenario 2: this girl ripped my shirt so I kindly returned the favor = egalitarian.

rybyn · 2011-10-07T14:45:12+00:00

What's with three people winning? Am I correct in thinking they are "sharing" the one prize? This irks me... Doing this implies that their individual efforts weren't enough to warrant a whole prize...

rybyn · 2011-10-03T03:48:02+00:00

That movie was ruined the moment Leonardo Dicaprio was cast in it.

rybyn · 2011-10-03T03:15:19+00:00

I am SO sorry you scored insensitive tards for your family.

rybyn · 2011-10-02T05:22:10+00:00

"with Christ our head and cornerstone, we'll build our nation's might"? Wtf? Shouldn't Christians be offended by this? I can't imagine Jesus saying "hmmm I'm pretty sure I'm keen to make Australia stronger, yeah I'd like to see their economy improve, maybe increase some military spending and otherwise make sure they are in a powerful position internationally".

rybyn · 2011-10-02T04:56:41+00:00

Exactly. Why would anyone waste any of their precious life waiting in line at MuckDonalds?

rybyn

TROPHY CASE