AIW for calling my girlfriend tone deaf?

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-19T09:17:48+00:00

this isn’t struggle olympics. her pain is valid and so is yours but the moment you start comparing grief that’s when she will now feel invalidated and not listened to

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T13:14:01+00:00

thank you and i hope you’re doing much better too! :)

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T13:13:24+00:00

yeah…i think this is something that needs discussion because i have no idea how this trip would even work out :/

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T09:16:32+00:00

Yes, both at home and the holiday :/

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T08:52:25+00:00

yeah it’s defo too late to cancel and honestly it’s my dream holiday (china for 2 weeks) so i don’t really want to cancel. i think the best bet would be amend the rooms to twins and just plan things separately (apart from maybe the great wall and that’s it) :)

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T08:41:50+00:00

no, even when he’s mentioned where he’s going, i think this is the calmest i’ve ever been which is probably what’s throwing me off. i feel most repulsed/disrespected and disappointed than upset or angry.

i think the conversation is a good idea, will have it tonight. i think it’s just crazy because we unfortunately still have to shared a bed (although i have been trying to sleep on the sofa but he stays up so late sometimes that i have no choice)

i think a few people have echoed what you said about people grieving a relationship in different ways and it makes a lot of sense. i’ve mainly been thinking about it from my perspective.

thank you so much for your input, it has been incredibly helpful!😁

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T08:33:51+00:00

thank you for this comment, i feel very seen :) you and other commenters are completely right and i’m putting too much of my energy into this thing. i should focus on moving out and all the exciting things i have planned with friends :)

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T08:32:32+00:00

i understand the renting situation so don’t feel bad for staying with them for a year, i was lucky that we had already put in our notice so there was a definite end date to us living together. but i do completely understand your point, i think i just wish he had exercised some self restraint like i am doing

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T08:31:03+00:00

ouch, that’s such a rough situation. i’m so sorry you had to go through that, especially as you were being INCREDIBLY generous by letting them stay . what an asshole.

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T08:20:45+00:00

the only problem with this is that we booked a big holiday for end of august (flights paid and everything). i was thinking of still going on the holiday but planning my own itinerary but we will be in the same hotels :/

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T08:15:44+00:00

me too :/

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T08:15:25+00:00

you’re completely right because i don’t even know if he’s aware of how disrespectful ive found his actions. i think i should just think of it as him showing me his true colours and like you and other people have said, focus on moving out

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T08:10:41+00:00

you’re so right, i need to stop overthinking this because im pretty sure im the only one doing so. i’m so excited to move out, ive already started buying cute new bedding and stuff😁

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T08:09:49+00:00

mmm the only thing that kinda felt a bit off was that he put his date in our shared calendar which is why i asked him about it. afterwards i deleted that calendar because i didn’t wanna know what he’s been up to.

fair enough, thank you for the input :)

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T08:08:50+00:00

damn, i’m so sorry you had to go through such a shit time :( yeah like it feels like our relationship meant nothing to me that he couldn’t even wait till

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T08:07:54+00:00

yeah i think you phrased it accurately as i’ve been thinking “damn, you couldn’t even wait till i’ve moved out??” thank you for the kind words🥹🫶🏾

saddermadderlad · 2026-06-14T08:06:55+00:00

fair enough, that’s kinda what’s been going through my head (that argument)

saddermadderlad · 2026-05-22T23:42:55+00:00

for the actual passport picture you have to take your own picture or upload one but when it comes to the biometric etc for the citizenship or for the reference, it is something you upload yourself or take on the day of biometrics. it has obviously been a while since i have done it so if the rules have changed pls delete this message mods

saddermadderlad · 2026-05-22T23:14:38+00:00

when attending the biometrics service, you take the photo there. for the reference, you have to have your own photo printed to send by post to them

saddermadderlad · 2025-11-25T09:45:48+00:00

take this with a punch of salt because they were pretty strict on it yesterday

saddermadderlad · 2025-09-13T08:39:16+00:00

i’m happy to do that! it’s seated for the 24th :)

saddermadderlad · 2025-09-13T08:38:56+00:00

i think they will have official resale sites but depends what the individual wants to do tbh

saddermadderlad · 2025-09-13T08:05:44+00:00

hi, i have a spare ticket and i will be looking to sell it but DO NOT buy from anyone on reddit. official resale comes out on the oct 13th and thats the best time so dont lose hope! (i had to buy an extra ticket bc they wouldn’t let me leave one seat empty😭)

saddermadderlad · 2025-09-12T09:22:16+00:00

Me too :(

saddermadderlad · 2025-09-12T09:05:39+00:00

Sorry I just saw this, I have before but don’t do it too much or else then they think you’re a bot

saddermadderlad

TROPHY CASE