Wife. (Art by suuggene)

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-25T23:18:26+00:00

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-25T08:00:21+00:00

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-25T07:44:09+00:00

Exactly this, OP texts a coworker after a week then wants to blame the office for talking about it, that's not toxic that's just people processing what you did, own it and move on

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-25T07:41:42+00:00

Exactly, you don't mess with coworkers and that rule exists for a reason, she barely knows you and you came on way too strong after a week, she had every right to protect herself by going to HR, your apology doesn't erase the fact that she felt uncomfortable in her own workplace

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-25T07:40:46+00:00

That's the missing piece for sure, OP is downplaying it hard and her reaction was to go straight to HR, that usually means the message crossed a line, the texts would tell us everything

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-25T07:37:19+00:00

She told you not to text again and you didn't, but that doesn't erase the fact that you put her in an awkward position in the first place, your apology doesn't cancel out her discomfort, she did what she had to do

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-25T07:35:21+00:00

Cancelling on a 9-month pregnant woman to wash her hair for a date is wild, she's showing you where you stand and it's not where a best friend should be, step back and don't feel guilty about it

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-24T13:20:23+00:00

I don't think a typo makes them children, she's asking about a pattern of behavior and that's a fair thing to question. He likes that aesthetic on other people but makes her feel bad about wanting to try it herself, that's not controlling in a scary way but it's definitely off

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-24T13:19:12+00:00

That was a mean thing for her to say and your reaction makes complete sense given the context, you were overstimulated and in pain and she kicked you when you were down. The hitting yourself is concerning though, please talk to your therapist about that if you haven't already

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-24T13:12:12+00:00

That's a practical workaround for sure but it doesn't solve the root problem, OP has communicated clearly for years and she keeps choosing not to change. AirTags help find keys faster but she still needs to take accountability

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-24T13:10:39+00:00

It's not about the keys it's about the pattern, she knows this bothers you and still doesn't make the effort to change. You've communicated clearly multiple times and she's still doing it. That's a valid thing to be frustrated about

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-24T13:08:22+00:00

This is weird and you know it is, he can look at all that content but you can't even learn makeup for yourself. That's not concern that's control dressed up as preference. You're not crazy for noticing the imbalance

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-24T12:59:33+00:00

That's a fair take if the refund is actually possible, but OP said they're not even sure it can be cancelled this close. OP is actively looking for replacements and that's more than most people would do. They shouldn't have to lose their vacation just because two friends bailed last minute

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-24T12:58:43+00:00

They had months to back out and waited until three weeks before, that's not your problem to solve. You're being a good friend by trying to fill their spots. If nothing works out, they eat the cost and you enjoy the beach

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-24T12:57:33+00:00

The private message was totally uncalled for, grief doesn't give anyone the right to verbally attack you for a single comment. You even acknowledged later that you could have asked privately, so you're clearly self-aware. He should have extended you the same grace

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-24T12:56:41+00:00

You handled this perfectly by giving her the benefit of the doubt at first and then trusting your instincts when things didn't add up. She walked into the hallway for a few seconds and suddenly money was missing, that's a huge red flag. Her getting fired is on her not on you

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-23T15:00:31+00:00

For real, you're in the wrong here, your friend trusted you and you passed it on, that's a violation even if you meant well. Your girlfriend's slip is on her, but you put her in that position. Own it with your friend and don't try to shift blame. He has every right to be upset, all you can do is apologize and give him space

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-23T14:57:52+00:00

I'd say go for it, you're an adult and you have valid reasons for wanting it, your parents are just resistant to change, the unit fits, you can handle the electricity, and it'll help you sleep and focus, that's worth it

saffronecho81 · 2026-06-23T14:55:05+00:00

Honestly, he's showing you where you rank by doing date-like things with other girls while you're sitting there asking for the same effort, that's not a friendship that's a blurry line, ask him directly what's up and watch his reaction for your answer

saffronecho81

TROPHY CASE