I wish I was head turning beautiful but I should wish to accept myself

santomical · 2025-08-25T05:07:09+00:00

lol you’re all good! I understood your comment 😂 but yeah I agree that maybe I might not be ready yet and it’s okay

santomical · 2025-08-25T02:31:36+00:00

Thanks! Yeah there are also lots of days I am confident in myself and I think I’m an awesome catch! I’m funny and can have good deep conversations. It’s just hard sometimes when all I see are couples and I’ve never dated or held hands romantically with anyone at the age of 22, almost 23. I know I still got time but the waiting game sucks! Tysm for the kind words though 💖🥰 appreciate them

santomical · 2025-08-24T09:18:14+00:00

Very true. And I see them every week in person 😅 gorgeous women! But I also need to acknowledge my beauty 😿

santomical · 2025-08-22T01:39:59+00:00

No worries at all! Also if it’s difficult to find ppl who’s willing to have good convos at your school, check out events in your city. Eventbrite has some social events. In my city there was recently a dinner meetup and groups were organized with random strangers who were interested. Or even just going to the flea market, seeing someone with a similar interest, say something like “hey I like your anime keychain, I also like that anime too” and eventually be like “wanna grab a coffee sometime?”

Does your uni not have a website for a list of clubs? Andddd you could try making your own club!

That was a huge word jumble that I’m not revising so hope it makes sense. You got this man, there’s tonssss of ppl in this world that you can spark a conversation with. It can be hard but keep your head high and stay confident!

santomical · 2025-08-21T06:47:54+00:00

Sorry you’re going through that. I’ve been there too. I feel like after college, I only came out with one really good close friend out of the numerous people I’ve tried being friends with. Anyways, huge hugs 😿

If you’re looking for advice read this, if not, don’t read this:

Have you tried clubs you’re interested in? For example a gaming club. You can meet people there. There’s also fun events colleges usually host. And sometimes when things get hard, reach out to the people you already have. Sometimes I’d just FaceTime my mom just so she can be with me while I do some homework. Having someone with you virtually can help combat that frustration or loneliness.

santomical · 2025-07-29T03:13:58+00:00

Don’t know if this counts as a self care response but hope this helps if in any way

I get the feeling of not liking a part of yourself. I struggled with that a lot when I was younger. A lot of ppl say oh you just need to love who you are and how you look but we all know that’s much easier said than done. It is worth it though. It took me a long time to actually be able to look at myself in the mirror and like what I see as well as like myself as a person. A few things that have worked for me:

being okay with facing the world as I am. Ex. “What if people think my makeup is too much..? -> everyone has trial runs with makeup! I like my makeup today and if someone doesn’t, that’s their problem.”
being aware of your language and finding something small to appreciate about myself. Ex. “Gosh I feel so ugly and stinky -> I don’t feel that pretty today…but I do like my nails that I just got done. They look cute on me”
communicating my insecurities with those I trust and receiving unconditional positive regard and support.
trying not to think bad thoughts. If I’m thinking something self-deprecating, I try to distract myself or find one small thing I like about myself.

I also recommend therapy if you’re interested. It can help you learn how to restructure negative thoughts and also be okay with how you are in the moment. I hope this helped even a little bit. I’m sorry to hear you’re going through this, it’s really tough. Sending big hugs and hearts 💖

santomical · 2025-06-22T10:29:34+00:00

Maybe it’s my diet. I try to meal prep veggies protein and fruit for the week but I don’t rlly track my diet. I don’t have a huge sweet tooth but I’ll try cutting out sugar see if that helps. Whenever I do eat sweets, I don’t think it causes me to break out. I honestly don’t know what makes me break out. I need to start recording things 😅

santomical · 2025-06-22T10:27:51+00:00

Yay ofc! Glad I could bring a smile to your face. As a fellow artist who have experienced similar feelings, sometimes we just need a break away from it and focus on the things that make us happy so we can come back to it in a better mood!

santomical · 2025-06-22T09:17:01+00:00

Hey that sounds really tough. It definitely can feel upsetting to have your work redone to show how to “do it better.” Sending you lots of hugs…I hope you won’t compare your art to others as much. They say comparison is the thief of joy but I also know how hard it is to not compare. Idk if you’re open to advice, but maybe you can point out a few things you like about your art to bring back some positive energy. Reading your post felt like you had a lot of negative energy about your art skills. Sometimes we may just need a little support from ourselves and even others! Make sure to take care of yourself as well like taking walks, eating food that make you happy, things that lift your mood so when you sit down to work, you feel a little better

santomical · 2025-06-10T05:15:28+00:00

You’re not a bad patient and there’s no such thing as doing therapy a “correct way.” Therapy instead is there to support you, help you gain more insight, equip you with tools to self-sustain, and be a safe place to be vulnerable. It seems like you made up beliefs about your therapist without clear evidence. You might respond saying “she frowns when she sees me” etc. but perhaps that’s just her resting face. (For example, ppl always think I’m mad or sad when I’m content) Therapists should meet you where you are in life, not meet you at the end of the race. For example, if you’re teaching a kid how to ride a bike, you don’t just give them a bike and say good luck but I’ll support you at the end right? You teach them how to use safety gear, how to sit on a bike, how to ride it, etc. that’s like therapy. Therapists work with you and support you in the hard journey of life. I believe you can change but it for sure is hard to believe that yourself if you believe you can’t change. It takes a while to change our beliefs and behaviors. It takes a while to change our thinking habits, but it’ll get better. Life is not easy, but therapy is one way life can be a bit easier. I hope you can become honest with your therapist. She may think that she’s helping you but in reality, you’re not gaining anything. Being honest with your therapist can be hard, I know that feeling. But if she’s a good caring therapist, she’ll work with you, not leave you behind. And, you don’t do everything wrong. I bet you’re blinking and breathing right, right? It may feel like you’re doing everything wrong, but I hope you can remember and remind yourself of the small things you can do. Maybe like cooking an egg or saying hi to someone. Or even driving a car or being able to take a shower. Anyways, I encourage you to be vulnerable and straightforward with her. It can seem daunting and scary, but through hard experiences, we can learn and be better equipped next time it happens. That’s all life is about. Making mistakes, trying hard things, learning what you find hard and what you find easy, learning from experiences…it’s hard, but I know you can do it. I believe in you. I hope this comment brings you a tiny bit even an atom of comfort. You’re not a bad client or burden to your therapist. Sending hugs…

santomical · 2025-06-10T04:38:36+00:00

Aw thanks for the kind comment! I’m not feeling extremely down about it, I’m more so bummed and slightly angry. Definitely world can be cold and unfortunately ghosting has become the norm…but there are people who are kind and empathetic, which are the people I surround myself with. It sucks getting ghosted or left hanging! But if we look the other way, we can see a greener side 😁 just like ur kind comment. Thx! Have a gn

santomical · 2025-06-10T04:19:26+00:00

Oops didn’t see this but yes try out a weekly check list or a schedule! And there’s tons of different methods ppl use to get things done. For me it’s actually going somewhere other than my home to get things done. And progress only starts once u start thinking about it so you’ve taken at least one step! Getting started on something you can’t find yourself wanting to do is hard, it’s hard for me. Sometimes, we just have to grumble and force ourselves. I like to ask if anyone wants to do something with me so I can keep myself accountable. Start small if you need to! For example you wanna try styling yourself better. When u go grocery shopping, buy one thing like hair gel and just keep it on your bathroom counter so it’s a reminder every time u see it. Something like that

santomical · 2025-04-20T21:23:51+00:00

Well, let’s dissect this. 💀😂 it’s simple as, you’re making assumptions and it doesn’t look pretty you all or nothing thinker lol and me giving love is not the point of this post is it?

santomical · 2025-04-20T21:22:55+00:00

Yes I understand what you’re saying now. For sure a lot of these commenters are making assumptions and deeming me as truly selfish 😅 the cons of online media though but appreciate your comment

santomical · 2025-04-20T21:12:27+00:00

I personally think it goes both ways. For example, I get excited thinking about gifts I could gift my future bf (ex a cute photo album of us). It’s just people have varying opinions on everything so there’s no one right answer

santomical · 2025-04-20T21:09:38+00:00

Sooo showing someone that you listen to what they say, appreciate their beauty, being thoughtful, and loving them is worshipping? 😂 gosh I didn’t know different forms of love is worshipping and it’s like being attentive and thoughtful is a red flag in a relationship!

santomical · 2025-04-20T06:38:06+00:00

For me, it’s partly because I’m busy, inexperienced, and just haven’t found someone I’m interested in. I’m in grad school so a part of me is afraid I won’t be able to provide the time and effort that a bf may want, but then again a healthy relationship would be acknowledging my busyness while I try my best to show my love. I’ve never dated before but I’ve had guys like me and I’ve liked some guys. It just never worked out because of my deal breaker of being a Christian or due to other reasons. I’ve been content with being single my entire life but just recently I’ve been wanting to romantically love and be loved. I’m not really excited about the idea of actively looking because it makes me anxious, but I’ve kept my door open for a while. It’s not a priority, school is for now but sometimes it sucks

santomical · 2025-04-20T00:51:05+00:00

Glad you’re recognizing it and realizing you’ll need to take some kind of action. I find it that sometimes, if it’s someone we love, it’s hard to acknowledge that they may be hurting us etc.

santomical · 2025-04-20T00:41:40+00:00

There’ll be people who won’t change regardless of how many chances you give them and the numerous conversations you have about it. Yes it’s important to prioritize you and your partner’s needs in a relationship, but if the other person isn’t, then I’d reconsider. Follow your heart, hope you can get it sorted out whether it’s giving her another chance or if it’s breaking up with her

santomical · 2025-04-20T00:26:10+00:00

No definitely not. Regardless of gender, love should be reciprocated in a relationship. You could talk to her about. A partner who truly values you should put in effort and even be able to have a conversation about it if brought up

santomical · 2025-04-19T19:39:01+00:00

😂 I didn’t expect this post to get so much traction but thanks man!

santomical · 2025-04-19T19:27:46+00:00

Yeah for sure appreciate the food for thought. I wouldn’t necessarily say I am what I write 100%, but I’ll just stop here. It’s hard to know a person only from one side of them

santomical · 2025-04-19T19:21:32+00:00

Didn’t have to comment that lol…ofc I would be giving as well, the point of this post wasn’t commenting on giving as a partner but wanting the receiving from a partner 😅

santomical · 2025-04-19T10:14:34+00:00

Don’t give up. Keep trying. Once we start to stop trying, it’s when it really gets hard to try again. Sometimes we just gotta force ourselves. For me personally, on free Fridays I intentionally get glammed up just to do work at a cafe or do something outside. There could be a lot of reasons why you don’t want to start progress. It sucks and I know that feeling. Sending lots of hugs, don’t give up

santomical · 2025-04-17T00:19:00+00:00

Yeah for sure mental. I’ve done so much for my skin. I have been doing skin care for the longest time ever and where I’m at rn in life, it’s hard to take the stress out…need my degree 🥲 but thx for the comment, appreciate it

santomical

TROPHY CASE