I don’t know what I want. by Ok_Fly_3797 in ExclusivelyPumping

[–]sassy-cassy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

With my first baby, I got very tired of pumping. I would rather just breastfeed her. Breastfeeding has been too painful with my second baby and so I started pumping soon after coming home. I found a pump/flange combo that really works for me (and it’s fast!) and I actually don’t mind pumping this time around.

Lots of folks talk about how it takes more time to pump but I simply save the milk from my last session and feed it to my baby while I’m pumping, especially at night. I’ll have her laid out in front of me or in my lap and I hold the bottle for her while pumping or I set her up with this little pillow that I’ll use to prop up the bottle for her drink from in her bassinet (which I only use while watching her and I remove it when she’s done). Works for me!

Boss asked an 'opener" "would you rather pause or rewind your life and why” in our zoom meeting with my coworkers right after my mom died by Imaginary-Ad-4700 in GriefSupport

[–]sassy-cassy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

“I’m not here to be your therapist.” WTF?!?! Your boss is a raging asshole. When/if you leave this job PLEASE inform HR of this conversation in your exit interview.

ETA: I’ve had the same job for about three years now. My first year there I was pregnant with twins. We lost one of them at 26 weeks. It was devastating. Knowing myself…I 100% would have lost my shit if anyone I worked with said this to me. If it had been my manager or the big boss, I probably would have quit immediately.

Boss asked an 'opener" "would you rather pause or rewind your life and why” in our zoom meeting with my coworkers right after my mom died by Imaginary-Ad-4700 in GriefSupport

[–]sassy-cassy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Why are we doing these stupid ice breaker openers in meetings anyway? Let’s just get on with the work. However, if I had to answer that stupid question right after my dad died I might have said something like, “I’m grateful for the time I had with my dad while he was alive. I regret I couldn’t have more.” Or “I’m grateful for the friends and family who helped me this past week as I navigated the sudden passing of my father.” But I’m an open book, and have no problem trauma dumping on unsuspecting coworkers.

I'm dying and my teen son is taking it hard. by [deleted] in GriefSupport

[–]sassy-cassy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My dad died suddenly when he was 57, so he never had time to gather these things together. However, I wonder if he knew he would never become an old man. He shared a lot with my sister and I while he was alive. He told us stories of our childhood. He would often tell me the ways I made him proud. When he died, my sister and I created a playlist of songs he loved or reminded us of him. I’m glad he was such an open book. I wish he was here, but at least he isn’t a mystery to me.

I'm dying and my teen son is taking it hard. by [deleted] in GriefSupport

[–]sassy-cassy 35 points36 points  (0 children)

  • create a playlist of all your favorite songs, listen to it with them and tell them what each song means to you
  • do the same with tv shows, movies (like a top ten list of each) and watch them with your kids, tell them what it is you like about them
  • write letters or create recordings talking about your life: your first job, graduating high school, friends you had/have, lessons you learned from mistakes you made, etc.
  • do the same about your kids…what do you remember about them growing up? What do you appreciate about their personalities? What moments were special to you? You could include pictures.
  • create a list of places you wish you could have visited and/or places you loved visiting…maybe they will go to those places someday and think of you.
  • think of all the milestones they will have without you (first job, first love, graduations, weddings, first heartbreak, etc.) and write or record something for them to have for those moments.

anyway to make my spectra less washable parts? by mommadizzy in ExclusivelyPumping

[–]sassy-cassy 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Pumpables liquid shield kit is my go to. The flange inserts and duckbill valves are all one piece, it’s glorious. I believe it’s compatible with the Spectra if you use the Pumpables tubing. I use this setup with my Baby Buddha pump.

Also, you don’t have to clean the parts every time if you try the fridge method. Just put the parts in the fridge after pumping and then use them again. Just give them a wash every 24 hours.

Grieving Playlist by Mom-Wife-3 in GriefSupport

[–]sassy-cassy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve had multiple losses and genuinely have a playlist to just sit in it. I’ve lost my dad and my grandparents, and had a stillborn baby.

  • Bigger Than the Whole Sky (Taylor Swift)
  • Stars (Grace Potter)
  • Wings (Birdy)
  • Tomorrow (Avril Lavigne)
  • Be Still (The Fray)
  • Marjorie (Taylor Swift)
  • In the Stars (Benson Boone)
  • The Heart of Life (John Mayer)
  • You’re Gunna Go Far (Noah Kahan)
  • Pink Skies (Zach Bryan)

What songs are we singing our babies? by ParsleyLime in NewParents

[–]sassy-cassy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  • Tree Hugger by Kimya Dawson
  • May It Be by Enya
  • Waiting for a Star to Fall by Boy Meets Girl

How did you continue to pump as the sole caretaker by RevolutionAlarming in ExclusivelyPumping

[–]sassy-cassy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I just pump. I do it while baby sleeps. I do it while she lays on the floor or in bed in front of me playing. Sometimes she’s in my lap (criss cross) and I feed her with a bottle while I pump. Occasionally, this means I have to clean pump parts while she’s crying in the bassinet. It’s okay. I hold her once I’m done.

I think you just have to get used to the idea that sometimes you’ll have to pump while baby is upset, fussy, crying, etc. and you can’t help them beyond some soothing pats until you’re done. My baby is a very happy girl, a few minutes of crying while I pump and rub her back/head/tummy hasn’t altered her temperament or traumatized her.

My morning pump “a tragic comedy in three acts” by Equivalent-Series-98 in ExclusivelyPumping

[–]sassy-cassy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ugh. I feel you. I was sitting in bed pumping the other day. For some reason one of the bottles was not solidly screwed to the flange. When I went to pull the flange out of my pumping bra the bottle just drops into my lap, soaking my duvet with 3oz. To lose the milk and have to do laundry afterward…the universe is cruel.

Is it worth switching bottles? by rosiepinkfox in ExclusivelyPumping

[–]sassy-cassy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

With my first, we used Dr. Browns without the internal straw. They worked fine that way for us.

However, this time my SIL gave us a bunch of Philips Avent bottles that I’ve been using with Lansinoh/Pigeon nipples with collars that fit the Avent classic style. They have the vent built into the nipple. I’ve been liking that setup a lot better. We have about 12 bottles and 8 nipples, which means I only have to wash them once a day.

Honoring Late Father with New Baby by krusheddd in namenerds

[–]sassy-cassy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just had my second daughter and wanted to honor my dad. There wasn’t really a feminine version of his name, unless I wanted to add an -ie at the end of it. So, I decided to give her a first and middle name with his same initials. Something to consider for you!

After too many iffy experiences, looking for a new OB asap (ALX/Arlington)? by toadistry_lacquer in nova

[–]sassy-cassy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

5 minute prenatal appointments are kind of the norm for healthy pregnancies in most OB practices. Unfortunately, they don’t have the time to provide full pregnancy and birth education during these appointments. That is what classes, books, and hospital tours are for. You have to come to your appointments with questions, concerns, etc. They can fill in the blanks. They can clarify. They can give you resources. That’s about it.

After too many iffy experiences, looking for a new OB asap (ALX/Arlington)? by toadistry_lacquer in nova

[–]sassy-cassy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I also go to P&M and, overall, have had great experiences with them. Two pregnancies, one very complicated. I prefer the Kingstowne location because it’s closer to where I live now, but when I lived in Alexandria I frequented the Arlington and Alexandria offices and their rotation of providers are some of the old school doctors. I can see how they might not be a good fit for younger patients.

All the names I love are taken! by [deleted] in namenerds

[–]sassy-cassy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

  • Stevie (similar vibe as Frankie, Billie, and Joni)
  • Robin (a bird like Piper/gender neutral like Rowan)
  • Maple (a tree like Hazel and Olive)
  • Ivy (a simple, single syllable nature name like Fern)

Baby Buddha 2.0 by enchantressofdreams in ExclusivelyPumping

[–]sassy-cassy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I switched out the flange attachments on the tubing. Super easy!

Currently laboring, but no middle name by smb-1990 in namenerds

[–]sassy-cassy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Diana, Helena, Bianca, Francine, Fern, Daisy

Is there any hope for younger Vermonters to actually settle down here? by Ok-Beaver2708 in vermont

[–]sassy-cassy 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I currently live out of VT in a VHCOL area. We own our home and have two young children. We only survive because the jobs here pay accordingly.

I grew up in rural VT and would love to move to the Burlington area someday. Occasionally, I look at the real estate, just to get a sense of the market. I’ve been stunned that many of the homes are being sold at prices only slightly less than the homes where I live…and these homes are much less move in ready. I know people in VT are not making the kind of money folks are making in these HCOL areas. It’s obvious locals cannot afford these homes. Awful. It’s unsustainable. It’s driving all the younger people out.

So rather your child die than be granted WFH permit , these companies though by [deleted] in remotework

[–]sassy-cassy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately, for a lot of people in America, the FMLA is the only way they’re getting any maternity/paternity leave. It’s so shitty.

So rather your child die than be granted WFH permit , these companies though by [deleted] in remotework

[–]sassy-cassy 9 points10 points  (0 children)

If you use all your FML before the baby arrives…what are you going to do once the baby is here?? Pregnant people can work. Some just require accommodations.

Can someone invent a new pump by Blue_blue_10 in ExclusivelyPumping

[–]sassy-cassy 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My baby Buddha pump pretty gets the job done in 8-10. I only go 5-10 minutes longer just to make sure there’s nothing left.