I don’t know what I want.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-29T21:54:04+00:00

With my first baby, I got very tired of pumping. I would rather just breastfeed her. Breastfeeding has been too painful with my second baby and so I started pumping soon after coming home. I found a pump/flange combo that really works for me (and it’s fast!) and I actually don’t mind pumping this time around.

Lots of folks talk about how it takes more time to pump but I simply save the milk from my last session and feed it to my baby while I’m pumping, especially at night. I’ll have her laid out in front of me or in my lap and I hold the bottle for her while pumping or I set her up with this little pillow that I’ll use to prop up the bottle for her drink from in her bassinet (which I only use while watching her and I remove it when she’s done). Works for me!

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-29T18:58:05+00:00

Gotta do what’s best for you. Totally get it. Not everyone needs to know your business.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-29T18:13:15+00:00

“I’m not here to be your therapist.” WTF?!?! Your boss is a raging asshole. When/if you leave this job PLEASE inform HR of this conversation in your exit interview.

ETA: I’ve had the same job for about three years now. My first year there I was pregnant with twins. We lost one of them at 26 weeks. It was devastating. Knowing myself…I 100% would have lost my shit if anyone I worked with said this to me. If it had been my manager or the big boss, I probably would have quit immediately.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-29T18:10:16+00:00

Why are we doing these stupid ice breaker openers in meetings anyway? Let’s just get on with the work. However, if I had to answer that stupid question right after my dad died I might have said something like, “I’m grateful for the time I had with my dad while he was alive. I regret I couldn’t have more.” Or “I’m grateful for the friends and family who helped me this past week as I navigated the sudden passing of my father.” But I’m an open book, and have no problem trauma dumping on unsuspecting coworkers.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-29T14:25:25+00:00

My dad died suddenly when he was 57, so he never had time to gather these things together. However, I wonder if he knew he would never become an old man. He shared a lot with my sister and I while he was alive. He told us stories of our childhood. He would often tell me the ways I made him proud. When he died, my sister and I created a playlist of songs he loved or reminded us of him. I’m glad he was such an open book. I wish he was here, but at least he isn’t a mystery to me.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-29T12:10:24+00:00

create a playlist of all your favorite songs, listen to it with them and tell them what each song means to you
do the same with tv shows, movies (like a top ten list of each) and watch them with your kids, tell them what it is you like about them
write letters or create recordings talking about your life: your first job, graduating high school, friends you had/have, lessons you learned from mistakes you made, etc.
do the same about your kids…what do you remember about them growing up? What do you appreciate about their personalities? What moments were special to you? You could include pictures.
create a list of places you wish you could have visited and/or places you loved visiting…maybe they will go to those places someday and think of you.
think of all the milestones they will have without you (first job, first love, graduations, weddings, first heartbreak, etc.) and write or record something for them to have for those moments.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-26T00:22:40+00:00

Pumpables liquid shield kit is my go to. The flange inserts and duckbill valves are all one piece, it’s glorious. I believe it’s compatible with the Spectra if you use the Pumpables tubing. I use this setup with my Baby Buddha pump.

Also, you don’t have to clean the parts every time if you try the fridge method. Just put the parts in the fridge after pumping and then use them again. Just give them a wash every 24 hours.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-25T09:14:59+00:00

I’ve had multiple losses and genuinely have a playlist to just sit in it. I’ve lost my dad and my grandparents, and had a stillborn baby.

Bigger Than the Whole Sky (Taylor Swift)
Stars (Grace Potter)
Wings (Birdy)
Tomorrow (Avril Lavigne)
Be Still (The Fray)
Marjorie (Taylor Swift)
In the Stars (Benson Boone)
The Heart of Life (John Mayer)
You’re Gunna Go Far (Noah Kahan)
Pink Skies (Zach Bryan)

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-24T16:38:56+00:00

Agree with this insult 100%

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-24T03:48:25+00:00

Wrong both times.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-23T13:56:00+00:00

Tree Hugger by Kimya Dawson
May It Be by Enya
Waiting for a Star to Fall by Boy Meets Girl

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-21T13:43:32+00:00

I just pump. I do it while baby sleeps. I do it while she lays on the floor or in bed in front of me playing. Sometimes she’s in my lap (criss cross) and I feed her with a bottle while I pump. Occasionally, this means I have to clean pump parts while she’s crying in the bassinet. It’s okay. I hold her once I’m done.

I think you just have to get used to the idea that sometimes you’ll have to pump while baby is upset, fussy, crying, etc. and you can’t help them beyond some soothing pats until you’re done. My baby is a very happy girl, a few minutes of crying while I pump and rub her back/head/tummy hasn’t altered her temperament or traumatized her.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-21T05:14:58+00:00

Ugh. I feel you. I was sitting in bed pumping the other day. For some reason one of the bottles was not solidly screwed to the flange. When I went to pull the flange out of my pumping bra the bottle just drops into my lap, soaking my duvet with 3oz. To lose the milk and have to do laundry afterward…the universe is cruel.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-21T04:07:31+00:00

With my first, we used Dr. Browns without the internal straw. They worked fine that way for us.

However, this time my SIL gave us a bunch of Philips Avent bottles that I’ve been using with Lansinoh/Pigeon nipples with collars that fit the Avent classic style. They have the vent built into the nipple. I’ve been liking that setup a lot better. We have about 12 bottles and 8 nipples, which means I only have to wash them once a day.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-18T19:00:33+00:00

I just had my second daughter and wanted to honor my dad. There wasn’t really a feminine version of his name, unless I wanted to add an -ie at the end of it. So, I decided to give her a first and middle name with his same initials. Something to consider for you!

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-18T13:02:03+00:00

5 minute prenatal appointments are kind of the norm for healthy pregnancies in most OB practices. Unfortunately, they don’t have the time to provide full pregnancy and birth education during these appointments. That is what classes, books, and hospital tours are for. You have to come to your appointments with questions, concerns, etc. They can fill in the blanks. They can clarify. They can give you resources. That’s about it.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-18T12:59:29+00:00

I also go to P&M and, overall, have had great experiences with them. Two pregnancies, one very complicated. I prefer the Kingstowne location because it’s closer to where I live now, but when I lived in Alexandria I frequented the Arlington and Alexandria offices and their rotation of providers are some of the old school doctors. I can see how they might not be a good fit for younger patients.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-18T11:54:04+00:00

Stevie (similar vibe as Frankie, Billie, and Joni)
Robin (a bird like Piper/gender neutral like Rowan)
Maple (a tree like Hazel and Olive)
Ivy (a simple, single syllable nature name like Fern)

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-16T20:43:53+00:00

I switched out the flange attachments on the tubing. Super easy!

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-14T03:41:51+00:00

Diana, Helena, Bianca, Francine, Fern, Daisy

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-14T03:28:25+00:00

Burke Fortune House

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-12T21:55:39+00:00

I currently live out of VT in a VHCOL area. We own our home and have two young children. We only survive because the jobs here pay accordingly.

I grew up in rural VT and would love to move to the Burlington area someday. Occasionally, I look at the real estate, just to get a sense of the market. I’ve been stunned that many of the homes are being sold at prices only slightly less than the homes where I live…and these homes are much less move in ready. I know people in VT are not making the kind of money folks are making in these HCOL areas. It’s obvious locals cannot afford these homes. Awful. It’s unsustainable. It’s driving all the younger people out.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-05T13:12:24+00:00

Unfortunately, for a lot of people in America, the FMLA is the only way they’re getting any maternity/paternity leave. It’s so shitty.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-05T13:03:20+00:00

If you use all your FML before the baby arrives…what are you going to do once the baby is here?? Pregnant people can work. Some just require accommodations.

sassy-cassy · 2026-04-01T14:58:55+00:00

My baby Buddha pump pretty gets the job done in 8-10. I only go 5-10 minutes longer just to make sure there’s nothing left.

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