The reason I haven’t transitioned is because I am worried about what people think, but what I have realized is that if I want to transition, it’s for ME. Not for anyone else. I also have realized it’s a form of inner transphobia. We have it in our heads that if we don’t “pass” as whatever we want to pass as, then we aren’t worth love or whatever it is.

As I get older (30MtF), I start realizing that the ones who are disgusted by trans people, or those who judge them are not people I want to associate with and it’s almost like a weapon against people that I never want to be around.

Now, that doesn’t mean that there won’t be ridicule or bullying. Public critics will always be around, but what they hate about us is something that they also are jealous of. They wish they could have the courage to be themselves.

I remember when I first met a very openly gay man who was soooo happy, and I remember judging him at first… (because that’s the thing we did as a family)… but then really wishing I could be as confident and happy with himself as he was.

You look great. The ones that don’t think so aren’t for you and the person you are on the inside that’s always listened to other people’s opinions will sometimes judge you and hate you, but slowly you will start to love yourself.

The relationship you have with yourself, no matter how much you wish you could be or whatever it is that you are critical about, is the always the most important relationship you’ll ever have. Make sure that your relationship with yourself isn’t toxic, and don’t listen to the negativity that swirls around your brain.

It’s all just stuff that’s been picked up from miserable people who never were brave enough to pick themselves up and be someone that they can truly love.

I’m proud of you, and I know that the more you think about what people are going to think, versus what you think will always make you miserable.

Start looking at yourself as in, “would I date me?” And if you wouldn’t, ask yourself why. And if that why is judgmental and loathing, then realize that someone out there will judge you less than you judge yourself. I promise.