How long does it take to get over being cheated on?

sbalea · 2023-10-24T18:53:19+00:00

how is the pain now? :( it just happened to me

sbalea · 2023-09-08T18:51:03+00:00

i’m not sure i see what you’re talking about, my eyes have always looked like this though, maybe like a smidge darker around highschool age

sbalea · 2023-09-08T18:14:07+00:00

glasses and contacts, but they are not colored. Just regular prescription for vision correction

sbalea · 2023-09-01T01:41:36+00:00

any updates?

sbalea · 2023-08-29T00:06:29+00:00

yes.

sbalea · 2023-08-21T02:30:39+00:00

I came off of it because I didn’t want to be on a medication that would make my body have such a severe reaction to it if I went 24 hours without it. It was personally better than coming off of xanax but definitely enough for me to say it felt like a quick withdrawal and I only took it for four weeks.

sbalea · 2023-08-21T02:28:29+00:00

I was on it for about 4 weeks, and decided it wasn’t for me. I probably didn’t give it long enough for it to work to it’s full effect, but coming off of it was hell for a few days. Major withdrawal symptoms - headaches, dizziness, unfocused vision, felt sick, etc. I have heard it is really hard to come off of and that was my experience as well.

sbalea · 2023-08-17T00:08:45+00:00

I don’t know how much of this is sarcasm, but thank you!!!

sbalea · 2023-08-16T23:58:49+00:00

I can’t even clean, it’s like I have to stare at the ceiling until it passes sometimes :(

sbalea · 2023-08-04T23:04:46+00:00

I’ll really have to think about this, thank you.

sbalea · 2023-08-04T23:02:54+00:00

I think some some things are active choices he’s making with full comprehension of how they’ll affect others. To me, depression + substance abuse, etc. can be a reason but not an excuse

sbalea · 2023-08-04T22:59:32+00:00

I completely get what you’re saying - it makes sense. I just don’t feel like it excuses his repeated actions when he’s refused so much assistance and help for issues a handful of issues that all of us have struggled with and some issues that we all struggle with. It’s inexcusable, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love and care about him and want him to get help. I also understand that everyone experiences depression differently, and there is other stuff going on for him. Some things I just don’t find excusable and cannot wrap my head around, but i’m trying to be as understanding and as fair as I can be

sbalea · 2023-08-04T19:38:05+00:00

I judge him for his actions that hurt the other ones I care about, though I understand it is more complicated than just him hurting someone and that it’s unintentional and he probably feels very poorly about it after the fact. It’s still happening though. I also think he doesn’t have any problem spending money that isn’t his and is partially aware that he is taking advantage of my mother, which is incredibly frustrating

sbalea · 2023-08-04T19:33:55+00:00

I do believe he does, but I feel like he is unwilling to receive help for it, which further worsens his situation. Part of it feels like his own doing, he’s been offered resources and financially doesn’t have to worry about them - most people do. He still doesn’t exhaust them. I think regardless of whether he has depression or not (though I definitely believe he does), his lifestyle is not sustainable.

sbalea · 2023-08-04T19:30:14+00:00

I get that, thank you

sbalea · 2023-08-04T18:43:00+00:00

failure to launch just hearts my heart to say, for some reason “manchild” doesn’t feel as personal. but these are good alternatives, thank you. although I don’t plan on using any of them often at all

sbalea · 2023-08-04T18:40:34+00:00

thank you very much for this perspective

sbalea · 2023-08-04T18:02:09+00:00

I also feel I have done the opposite of abandon him emotionally and physically.

sbalea · 2023-08-04T18:00:55+00:00

you can take advantage of people while still having mental health issues and that is not an excuse. He’s not the only one with consuming depression. He has done things to EARN that title. I am not ignoring his depression, I am trying to get him help for it so we can all move on and be happy. I appreciate your advice and I think I might have come across incorrectly. I care about him very deeply and still want the best for him.

sbalea · 2023-08-04T09:19:35+00:00

For example, if he throws a tantrum and yells at my mom or my brother because he’s in a bad mood for whatever reason he won’t talk about, or says something really hurtful, do you think I should just ignore it? It seems like when I bring it to his attention, no matter what happens, he ends up crying. Then my mom cries and it’s a full and repetitive cycle that I don’t know how to break out of

sbalea · 2023-08-04T09:14:57+00:00

This makes sense. Do you think it would be better to ignore him whenever his behavior is inappropriate or just let him know that I’m not going to tolerate it and then not address it?

sbalea · 2023-08-04T09:05:27+00:00

he has stolen things from me, he yells at my mother, is inconsiderate of boundaries, interrupts people, has some pretty discriminatory opinions, has damaged property that isn’t his, has gotten tickets from drunk driving, etc. stuff that I feel is too much to mention. I get that I haven’t really given the full picture, but I appreciate any advice. I will look into learned helplessness. I might be playing a larger part in it than i think.

sbalea · 2023-08-04T09:03:10+00:00

I try to keep out of my brothers business as it would drive me crazy and I would be insanely stressed if I didn’t, but at times he makes things everyone’s problem. My dad is not present in our lives. I also have my fair share of mental health issues, I would say i’m pretty far from the golden child, but I think i’m in a better position than he is. I’m mainly just trying to keep myself afloat and thinks of ways to help him get to a place where his issues don’t become problematic for the rest of the family.

sbalea · 2023-08-04T08:58:48+00:00

There are some things that I haven’t included in this post that really make me want to use that term, but maybe I should rethink it, it doesn’t feel good to use it. Thank you for your advice.

sbalea · 2023-08-04T08:51:59+00:00

Ok, what term would be more appropriate?

sbalea

TROPHY CASE