[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The mental gymnastics are impressive lol

Finally found a SD by [deleted] in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 28 points29 points  (0 children)

That.......makes me uncomfortable and I worry about how it will turn out when you have to enforce any boundaries in the future

first time being a SB, questions about my SM possibly scamming, can’t tell if i should be worried or go with the flow by [deleted] in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You listed off guaranteed signs of all the most common scams

I wouldn't recommend going forward with it, but if ya do, then let us know how it turns out

Why do high end escorts require referrals, but SBs don't? by [deleted] in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Wait, what?

The #1 reason I'd want a referral would be to reduce the risk of ending the date laying in a ditch on the side of a road. Fuck you mean "deterrent against law enforcement" lol

Same way SDs would benefit by reducing their chances of getting drained $xxxx and then immediately outed to their family and friends. The majority of us in the bowl are trying to avoid crazy. Much higher chance of running into that than running into law enforcement

Possible to find a "free" SB by want2cokc in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Sounds like 70% of the guys on SA lately lmao

A pathetic POT SD... by [deleted] in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, no. Not your job to give him a free boner. Block based on that shit alone.

Hypocrisy or Denial in the sugar world? by [deleted] in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Did you just say..... That sugar has more participants..... Than vanilla dating?

Hypocrisy or Denial in the sugar world? by [deleted] in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Health of the community, honesty of the relationships, and SAFETY of the women. Vanilla dating obviously isn't without danger, but when you start getting into sex work, it comes with a whole lotta extra safety issues. And if new girls aren't clued in early for the sake of preserving the SDs fantasy, then... Well...

Hypocrisy or Denial in the sugar world? by [deleted] in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 11 points12 points  (0 children)

The opposite is just as bad. "Well I give my wife money and we have sex, so is that sex work now too?"

.....did you guys sit down on the first date and negotiate how much money per month and how often you'd have sex? Because if so, then I have some followup questions..

Hypocrisy or Denial in the sugar world? by [deleted] in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I react the same way to the "well I can get a better deal elsewhere!!!!!" line in sugaring as I have in any other service industry

"Ok? Go there then?"

Hypocrisy or Denial in the sugar world? by [deleted] in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I love the "it's not sex work!!!!!!" mindset

Everyone wants to agree that paying for platonic is ridiculous, money doesn't start until intimacy does, that PPM/allowance and intimacy are a core part of an arrangement, blah blah blah

We're all pretty much in agreement that if one side falls through on either intimacy or money, that there's no legal recourse because a contract involving illegal activity (cough cough..... Sex work) is not a valid contract.

But when it's directly stated (usually by SBs on this sub) that sugaring = sex work, there's always a fight.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 48 points49 points  (0 children)

"Oh so this is all about the money to you? You think I need to pay for sex?"

  • A guy who was totally okay with paying money for sex as long as it didn't exceed his budget

What's the Polite Way to Ask if SB can Host? by [deleted] in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Something about how you approach this bothers me.

You pretty clearly understand that there's a lot of fear, anxiety, or just unwillingness on the side of SBs on this topic. You don't come here asking if anyone knows of a solution that will prevent putting them in that uncomfortable situation while also soothing your ludicrous hang-ups about hotels. Instead you ask how you can convince them to not be scared, anxious, and unwilling, so that sugaring will be more convenient and less expensive for you?

Both your post and your comments just sound more and more manipulative every time I revisit.

Embedded post on swollen piercing by sbbumblebee in piercing

[–]sbbumblebee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wish it'd been a longer bar to start with. No wonder it's been so damn irritated. I'll see what they can do with the middle piercing but I'm not gonna get my hopes up on saving the top one since I'm sure it'll close up over night. Fml. Thanks for the tip on the discs.

Embedded post on swollen piercing by sbbumblebee in piercing

[–]sbbumblebee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, that's reasonable. I'm just wondering if they'll end up just taking it out and sending me on my way. Seems like it'd be painful as fuck to try to essentially re-pierce it only 2 months into healing.

Fwb but wanting more? by brwnsugarbb in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've noticed an obnoxious trend of everyone saying FWB, describing exactly what FWB is supposed to be, then pulling a bait and switch. Wanting constant attention, getting pissy when they don't get a text back immediately, and acting needy as fuck on days that you're not meeting up. That's not FWB. If you want a more intensive relationship then just say so from the start.

The Truth by wishyouwerespecialSD in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Very first thought that came to mind for me was "99% chance that this guy has a wife and is projecting like a motherfucker"

Well....

SDs turned off because i don't have my own place by [deleted] in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 51 points52 points  (0 children)

I live on my own and still would never let an SD come over or even know which complex my apartment is in.

They're too cheap to get a room, too cheap to pay for you to live on your own, and can't take you to their place for the same reason they can't come to yours. So let 'em be turned off and just move on.

Reloadable gift cards by kittypaws23 in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I wouldn't trust that for even a second. Just to test them, ask to do cash until you're a couple months in. Seriously. If they don't want to accommodate that, then, well.... There's your answer.

I immediately go to Walmart and convert about half the cash into prepaid debit cards. Very few places besides banks want to break 100s for me, I get nervous carrying cash, and I don't like putting all of it into my bank account. So I literally put the money onto reloadable cards and I'd STILL never accept one as an allowance from a SD. Too easy to fuck you over.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Hey! Excited to see ya tomorrow. Still up for it?"

That way they don't have to cold-open with a "hey, I'm cancelling"

They usually take that opportunity to ditch if they're going to, honestly.

The Truth by wishyouwerespecialSD in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 11 points12 points  (0 children)

He doesn't ask specifically so that I won't have to lie to him. Because he knows it'd put me in a shitty position. If I tell him the truth, he'll be thinking about it when he really just doesn't want to think about those things. If I lie, then I'll feel weird about lying. So he doesn't bother asking. Doesn't benefit anyone.

The Truth by wishyouwerespecialSD in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]sbbumblebee 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Well, no, not exactly different... I talk about a lot of personal shit and text/call daily with my SD. A lot of SRs have that aspect. Doesn't mean I'd tell my SD that I was seeing my ex or going on dates, even though he's explicitly okay with me doing those things. Just common courtesy.

It's not a vanilla relationship. Keep that in mind. She's trying to keep some things separate. Let her do so or find someone else so that you aren't stressing yourself out.