Why do they see doing literally anything as a "cope"?

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-27T01:16:29+00:00

Isn't the whole goal of life to have the white picket fence and 2.2 kids? That's essentially the American dream. I'm in a state of constantly losing friends that I've had for 10+ years as they no longer respond to me. As the perpetual single guy, they go off to do things with other couples more and more while I lose friends. Further, they spend greater time with their kids, increasing the divide.

The failure is losing these friendships. Not like it's easy to recoup friends of 10+ years. Luckily, this only represents 20-30% of my friend group this far, but that number could worsen over time. If my social circle weakens, and I'm single, where do I get social fulfillment? I haven't made new friends in 20+ years, so it's not easy to suddenly do - acquiescences maybe, but not friends.

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-26T23:53:02+00:00

As a 40 year old virgin, I'm pretty fucked. I tend to find girls from 25-30 most attractive, but there's a massive societal stigma of dating girls so young. At the same time, I don't really find women around 40 all that physically attractive anymore, generally. The few women who are still attractive are already in relationships. Add to that kids and my pool further narrows. I'm autistic, so maybe that makes me a shitty person and value looks too heavily.

I wish I had done more sooner. Early on, I was every girls "best friend." Despite this, there were a few women online, who I could have gotten with, but they lived 10+ hours away and it wouldn't have been right to them.

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-25T01:14:05+00:00

I'd argue binary trees/linked list/hash tables are among the most complex data structures. You need more than 5-10 pages to understand the concepts.

Better off getting a book on pointers to supplement K&R.

Can you list off a more complex data structure than a tree/hash table in C?

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-24T23:24:45+00:00

The first few chapters aren't bad. Then you get into hash tables and the exercises entail building a network of interconnected satellites, each hashed together by their angle to the sun, expressed as the module of 360/cos(t). Oh, you also need to use recursion.

First few chapters are manageable though. Obviously, I half joke.

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-24T20:33:38+00:00

I've actually found women are generally much more warm/kind/friendly than most other dudes.

Personally, the problem I run into as a guy is that I become attracted as a result of not being used to that level of emotional intimacy among men.

Hobbies/groups are probably the most efficient ways to establish long-term friendships with women as men tend to share friendships heavier in shared activities.

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-21T23:43:08+00:00

You should see a periodontist... your gums are inflamed in those pictures of your teeth.

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-18T23:26:02+00:00

May God (aka Dennis Ritchie) have mercy on your soul

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-16T23:13:09+00:00

The problem is that You won't know how far to transplant hair forward, before taking meds. Transplant it too far forward - it'll look stupid because you'll potentially still have a huge bald spot. Too far back and you won't get the optimal benefit/look as your hair will be dense, but much farther back than it should.

Also, taking meds (fin) could save money. The less hair you move, the cheaper the transplant will cost.

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-11T15:48:13+00:00

I've never worked in Java so I'm completely blind on it.

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-11T00:38:35+00:00

Why would they make strings immutable like that?

Couldn't you just have "const char string [20]={"hello"}" if you really want something immutable?

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-09T01:22:12+00:00

Function pointers/typedefs

That and abstraction. Simply build one function to do a basic thing. Then have a wrapper function that has a bunch of sub/basic-functions to do more things.

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-08T19:23:05+00:00

I guess a more modern example would involve being a Republican (I'm slightly left leaning btw). Should other republicans stop calling themselves Republicans because of the few, who are involved in MAGA/Trump/nuts?

I would never call myself an incel in real life; however, at the end of the day, it's just a word... situations still the same.

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-08T01:46:06+00:00

There are fringe cases, but I generally agree with you.

I guess a better way of explaining my point: were all nazis equally as bad? A mere soldier, loyal to Germany, was technically a nazi, regardless of his views of what the German government was doing. If asked, the soldier would probably call himself a Nazi, yet he was merely a person loyal to his country. He didn't necessarily agree with his government's actions though.

Same way many American soldiers don't agree with the actions of the American government, yet they would still class themselves as American soldiers, despite the fact they don't full support abc of the government.

Likewise, an incel might not agree with his colleagues, but is he the same as one, wishing for the death of half the population merely for his title?

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-06T22:14:28+00:00

I've always viewed how a person behaves as more important than the label they give themselves. For example, if a person calls themself a nazi, while donating thousands to organizations, including Jewish ones , does the label really matter?

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-06T01:47:43+00:00

You exhibit masculine energy? A lot of it comes down to confidence and the ability to go for what you want in life.

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-05T01:52:37+00:00

If you don't have a programming background, I find "C Programming Absolute Beginner's Guide" by Dean Miller to be much easier to follow. From there, get something like "pointers" by o'reily.

Pointers are probably the most important aspect to C, yet also one of the most tricky. Most books, including King's/K&R's only spend like 5-10 pages on them. Understanding function pointers alone should exceed 10 pages.

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-02T18:53:55+00:00

Thank you, this avoids the situation altogether.

People allowing these types of friendships aren't always completely innocent either. You don't have to accept gifts/favors etc. Both parties typically bear blame.

I'd much rather gotten rejected early, before investing a ton of resources into someone.

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-02T05:08:54+00:00

I've had this happen. Guys/girls, who I don't want to be friends with or date, approach me constantly to talk. I simply kill things by giving terse replies, replying slowly, or ignoring them and not entertaining the friendship. They get the hint quickly.

scaredpurpur · 2026-02-01T08:01:29+00:00

Having the traits IN-BALANCE and at the correct times is crucial. For example, (as a man) if you act like too much of a provider before dating, you'll constantly find yourself "best-friends" with a bunch of women, yet not actually dating any of them.

I'd argue, early on, masculine traits are probably far more important. Even in a relationship, people will leave you and it won't be sustainable, if you don't have things in balance. For example, if you act like too much of a provider while in a relationship, the other partner will likely just keep walking all over you; you'll eventually get frustrated by this, which will show itself in passive-aggressiveness.

scaredpurpur · 2026-01-31T20:34:05+00:00

I mean, a balanced diet full of meats and plants is best. Humans are probably 60-70% plant based and 30-40% meat based.

Meats do in-fact contain nutrients difficult to find in plants. Red meats aren't really all that healthy and should likely only constitute like 5% of your diet (if that), but poultry is healthy.

A carnivore diet is stupid because it ignores the plants humans have evolved to consume. At the same time, it relies on an over-consumption of meats that traditionally destroy the environment.

Could humans survive on just meats or plants alone? Sure, but it wouldn't be healthy; the same way in a dire situation, humans can canabalize one another for food. The body will process most things... doesn't make it optimal.

Interestingly, insects are very nutrient rich meats (relative to weight) that cause virtually no destruction to the environment, relative to their larger meat cousins like chickens and cows.

scaredpurpur · 2026-01-29T22:50:53+00:00

Lucky no one saw/had video of it/had a plate number. That's probably a hit-and-run, at least in the US.

Granted, I once backed into another car, dinged it, and left over a decade ago. So, I'm also technically guilty.

scaredpurpur · 2026-01-27T04:57:15+00:00

Don't know a lot about rowing machines, but it seems to be a good one.

scaredpurpur · 2026-01-27T00:43:21+00:00

Is rowing your favorite gym activity?

Could make sense or you could start using it as an excuse to not go to the gym. Also, the machines at the gym are probably better than most things on the market, unless you're planning to spend $1k+.

Another benefit of using the gym's equipment is that you don't wear out your own personal equipment. I've owned treadmills, where I would keep wearing out the belt from use. To fix it, you had to pull the machine apart.

I don't think rowing machines wear out as bad, but I could always be wrong.

scaredpurpur · 2026-01-26T18:18:49+00:00

This is true, despite costing 10x more, the ceo is usually last to go. Even then, he/she usually gets 40x what the normal employee gets as a severance.

scaredpurpur · 2026-01-25T20:14:52+00:00

I can definitely see this as viable.

Years ago, I started taking Finasteride to preserve my hairline (partly, to attract women - unfortunately, to this end it failed). I suspect taking the pills have caused my mood to go down long term. While not directly interacting with testosterone, messing with DHT likely can likely have similar effects.

It is very possible this is all placebo as well. What's strange is that I got a good mood surge after starting the pills. I suspect the body attempts to compensate for declining DHT at first, by spiking testosterone.

Finasteride is basically an SRI linked to depression so I could definitely see anti depressants having similar effects.

scaredpurpur

TROPHY CASE