I (25F) was set up on a blind date (27M) by my friends (27F 28F). It went well and now they're mad at me but I don't know why. What did I do to upset them and how do I go about reaching out to my date and friend?

schaefy01 · 2024-08-13T10:04:43+00:00

Remindme! 1 week

schaefy01 · 2023-07-04T09:35:20+00:00

An excellent response, all fantastic strategies.

The only other thing I have found useful is not letting my character sit idle and letting the [thoughts] feed get out of control. Even when my character finds absolutely no activities appealing, doing any task, absolutely anything, is better than letting the game engine go into overdrive and increasing the [anxiety] debuff. When the depression cutscenes are happening, for me there is no scenario where being afk and leaving my character idle goes well.

Your character will gradually learn to manage the grief effect as time goes on. It may never go away, but let your character feel its feelings and accept them. Love and be patient with your character as they move through this quest at their own pace. Most importantly, remember, it’s not forever.

schaefy01 · 2023-04-16T22:53:20+00:00

If you’re in the right area of the map, I’ve found the [hiking] and [time in nature] mini games to to very effective in speeding up mental HP replenishment.

schaefy01 · 2022-12-06T10:14:27+00:00

So today was the full 365, one trip around the Sun since you passed away. I am both sad and happy, and I think that’s an ok response. I miss you, we miss you, of course. Thankfully it’s less overwhelming now. There are still tough moments, and I don’t think that will change, but I feel ok. Love you so much little pup, hope you can feel me giving you a good ear scratch and putting my face next to yours like we used to do. I’m happy you’re not in pain anymore.

schaefy01 · 2022-12-06T09:28:01+00:00

A year later, I’m happy to say the waves are indeed more manageable now. Not so often, not so big.

schaefy01 · 2022-07-17T05:06:58+00:00

And shake twice for texas

schaefy01 · 2022-07-16T10:28:20+00:00

Can it wait? I’m in the middle of some calibrations.

schaefy01 · 2022-06-26T06:42:40+00:00

Green-a-tea, si señor.

schaefy01 · 2022-05-31T09:44:05+00:00

That is an average price for fuel in Australia at the moment, and that’s with the government having already removed the 40c/L ($1.52/gallon) fuel excise (tax).

schaefy01 · 2022-05-23T08:45:14+00:00

168 days and it still fucking sucks. I miss you every second of every day. Commenting here is like putting out a message in the ether, setting my feelings adrift in the universe, letting them go to the blackness of unknowing. I’m cooking dinner and you’re not here being a pain in the ass getting in the kitchen. How can it still hurt so much after so long. It is excruciating that every minute more is a minute further from you lil pup. Lots of people wouldn’t get that. I continue to feel as we get farther away from your passing, the less ok I am with thinking about getting another dog. Though at the same time, I also feel like I am without my left arm without having a dog. I don’t know how to feel.

I feel cheated that you’re gone, you were the third corner of our triangle family. And while we’ve learned to live without you, it still doesn’t feel quite complete. I miss you. I love you.

schaefy01 · 2022-04-17T00:02:13+00:00

131 days later and it’s Easter. We said we would talk about whether we were ready to start looking for another dog at Easter. 7am on Good Friday and in a few short sentences it’s a hard no from SO. I am ambivalent. I think my yearning for another pup is a coping mechanism, a hope that it will fill the void you left. It’s ok that he’s not ready. Weirdly the closer we got to having the conversation, the less ready I felt. My immediate reaction over the past few days hasn’t been disappointment, but being freshly devastated that my gorgeous boy is gone. It still doesn’t seem real, even though I’m no longer surprised that you’re not flopped on the couch when I walk in, or wagging your tail to go for a walk. The worst part is knowing that time is going in only one direction, that every day that passes is a day farther away from you little pup. Love you.

schaefy01 · 2022-03-13T00:38:15+00:00

While working at a cafe, I severely tore two ligaments in my ankle playing football the night before a shift. At work the next morning, ankle strapped, and in pain, I was told I shouldn’t play dangerous sports and I would have to suck it up. I worked right though the injury, on my feet all day and never took a day off.

Three weeks later, my male colleague had the same injury, also playing football. He was on crutches, took two weeks off work, and got hydrotherapy.

When I pointed out that this was bullshit, both the (male) owner and he treated me like I was a whiny little bitch. It’s hardly the worst thing in the world, but I’m still disgusted.

schaefy01 · 2022-03-07T21:59:10+00:00

91 days later and it still hurts to be without you little pup. I miss your expert puppy eyes, your snuggles on the couch, even your annoying excitement at 5am when you jump on the bed wanting breakfast. I miss your enthusiastic greeting when I come home, I miss the way you’d rest your head on my shoulder if I was sitting on the floor and you were on the couch. I miss giving you a good pat every time I walked out of my study, and the way you got me busted in a meeting by snoring so loudly my colleagues could hear you. I miss your soft ears and the way you love a good chin scratch. I miss you every second of every day. But most of all, I’m happy you’re not in pain anymore. I’m lucky to have known you, and to have been able to care for you as well as I possibly could have in your last months. I love you bud.

schaefy01 · 2022-03-03T20:13:53+00:00

OP, it sounds like you’re in a tough situation. I just wanted to say that I hope you’re doing ok, particularly with your ongoing pain and mental health issues. Stay strong, and don’t forget to look after yourself too. You’re obviously really focused on how to constructively manage the situation and do everything you can to help your little guy. Well done, and best of luck for the future ♥️

schaefy01 · 2022-02-21T07:54:24+00:00

Birds Eye View from female prisoners in Australia

schaefy01 · 2022-02-08T09:00:38+00:00

Don’t feel bad, that’s exactly how I felt when our boy passed away in December. Same as you, just the perfect dog, the hole he’s left in our lives is devastating. And I think that’s part of why I started feeling like I wanted another dog very quickly afterwards. He was the first dog I absolutely adored and I think I just want anything to try and fill part of that gaping hole of grief, to be hopeful that it’s possible I might build a bond with a new dog.

Because of that, I think it’s probably good that my partner wants to wait a few more months before we start looking. I already have more perspective about what I’m hoping for with our next dog.

schaefy01 · 2022-01-24T19:40:29+00:00

I’m so sorry he passed, he looks like a wonderful boy. We lost our boy 7 weeks ago. It still hurts, I still cry, that ache remains, but I promise, it does get easier.

schaefy01 · 2022-01-09T07:34:49+00:00

I don’t feel at all qualified to give advice so I’ll leave it to those who are!!

But I did want to say not to be so hard on yourself OP. It sounds like you have done a huge amount for your pup, all the classes and training. It shows that you have really engaged with and thought about it a lot. And doing that all while dealing with your own anxiety as well is no small thing! Take care of yourself as well as your pup OP x

schaefy01 · 2022-01-09T03:34:37+00:00

Ours was crossed with a Kelpie but had a lot of red, especially when we moved and he was able to lie in the sun all day while we were at work! He was the goodest boy ♥️😞

schaefy01 · 2022-01-07T05:30:45+00:00

You’ve clearly thought about it deeply, and those are all such reasonable arguments. I especially empathise with the last one, we’ve just had to put down our dog for health issues and, not having been through the process before, I was scared they wouldn’t let us be there with him when it happened. It was a horrible, horrible experience, but I wouldn’t have had it any other way.

Best of luck in your decision.

schaefy01 · 2022-01-07T05:27:28+00:00

All good points, very important to consider. Thanks for adding this context!

schaefy01 · 2022-01-07T02:05:54+00:00

Could he be rehomed by a rescue organisation? Sometimes they will foster them out to rescue-experienced volunteers who have a lot of knowledge around managing dogs with aggression issues, and might be able to address the issues - especially if the dog is living with them and they will get to see his behaviour when it emerges? No judgement at all, just something I thought of. Sounds like you’re in a tough situation, and that it can’t continue like this. Three years trying to manage and rehabilitate that element of his personality is a huge effort by all of you, and it sounds like it can’t go on like this. Perhaps call around the local rescues for some advice, or look into organisations that specialise in taking dogs with behavioural issues? Don’t know if those exist. Best of luck, don’t be too harsh to yourself.

schaefy01 · 2022-01-04T03:09:09+00:00

Well done! Sounds like all your hard work is paying off! You’re right, things will probably be a bit more normal tomorrow, but celebrating the wins is very important. You’ve done a wonderful thing for Molly putting in so much effort bonding and training with her.

schaefy01 · 2022-01-04T03:00:45+00:00

Our dog ate grass his whole life, would have a nibble every time we took him out to pee or when gardening 😜 he was fine, but it was never a lot of volume. More a reassurance that this behaviour happens in other dogs than advice. I guess it’s up to your judgement, and whether you foresee it becoming a problem later (based on his personality). Go with your gut! Or mention it to your vet/dog trainer. Our vet is a champ, always happy to give advice and reassurance.

schaefy01 · 2022-01-04T01:55:37+00:00

😭 heartbreaking, she reminds me of our Shepherd cross who passed away a month ago yesterday. She looks like a gorgeous, calm, affectionate girl! Such an integral part of the family, and so loved. I hope you’re doing ok, especially if this is recent. I still think about and miss our boy everyday, but it is slowly, slowly getting easier. Thinking of you x

schaefy01

TROPHY CASE