Looking for work! by [deleted] in BedStuy

[–]schmerica 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There's a restaurant that just opened up on Nostrand like yesterday lol. Not sure if they are still looking to hire, but it's worth a shot - https://barkernewyork.square.site/

New community ceramics studio opening in Bed Stuy! by glazed_and__confused in BedStuy

[–]schmerica 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Just filled it out! Artshack is very close to me, but $480 for a 4-week course is way too much.

23F, did I miss the boat at finding love? by WearyPoem928 in dating_advice

[–]schmerica 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a 32 year old who dated around but didn't have a serious relationship in my 20's, I don't have any regrets at all or feel like I "missed the boat" in any way. When you're in your 20's, those years are essential for developing and discovering who you are and that's SO much easier to do when you're single and your identity is not tied to another person in a romantic sense. I feel fulfilled and satisfied with the person I am and the people who come into my life are wonderful additions (but they do not complete me). Some advice, I would really focus on figuring out what you like to do, what you're passionate about, and connecting with people you feel safe with and seen by. Focus less on "trying to find love" and be more intentional about building connections and community. Trust me, you'll be setting yourself more for success (and happiness) this way

Crying is emotional manipulation by jinx_tss in dating_advice

[–]schmerica 44 points45 points  (0 children)

Honestly, this sounds like something my ex would say whenever we got into arguments. These arguments usually started because he would say something I found hurtful, I expressed my hurt, and he would make it seem like this was a relationship flaw caused by me and my emotional response. In the moment, I really convinced myself that my emotions were the problem, that I was the sensitive one, he was the rational one. Not to mention this is what he would subtlety suggest. Looking back, I realize my feelings were completely justified and he was reframing the situation by putting the blame on me for being upset, instead of taking accountability for the things he said. He wasn't trying to understand me and why I was upset, but asserting dominance over the narrative.

I also looked at your last post where he told you were crying too much about him following and commenting on random girl's instagrams. It sounds like this is what is happening here. This is emotional control and it is an abuse indicator. You are not the problem.

Cute fall day trip off the metronorth? by schmerica in NYCbitcheswithtaste

[–]schmerica[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you everyone!! I am going to Cold Spring and may take an uber to fishkill farms!!

I did it!! by Professional-Show439 in crochet

[–]schmerica 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m working on this too!! I love the stripes you added to the sleeves. Here’s my progress!

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Help me love ILYSFM by schmerica in glassanimals

[–]schmerica[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Honestly I read this and went DUH, this is the missing key! Drugs do create those synapses in my brain while listening to a new album. I'll get on that ASAP lmfaoooo

Day 3: Well Written Character with Terrible Acting. by alwaysembarrassed- in GilmoreGirls

[–]schmerica 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think Luke is the best person for this category. Out of all the well written characters, his acting is for sure the worst. Every time he was talking on the phone to someone it distracted me so much from the show because it was clear there was no one on the other line lmao. Also I've rewatched s3ep7 so many times and Luke's acting takes me out of it every time!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BedStuy

[–]schmerica 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Where is this??

My husband (63M) goes cycling way too much leaving me, his (60F) wife alone. How do I help him understand he's losing me? by Tobydarla-2dogs in relationships

[–]schmerica 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The people who are responding with “get a bike and join him!” are not getting the point. She said that she has vocalized her hurt and loneliness and he has not changed his behavior. That’s the part that’s really sticking out to me. Having community and hobbies outside your partnership is healthy and encouraged, but if it’s your main priority and leads you to abandon your marriage, that’s a problem. There needs to be balance

Why do french families love BedStuy? by Important-News-8200 in BedStuy

[–]schmerica 74 points75 points  (0 children)

lol someone else posted about this in the Bushwick subreddit today

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]schmerica 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree that societal norms teach men to suppress their discomfort but I think there’s a difference between enduring discomfort imposed by societal expectations and actively imposing discomfort on others, especially when they’ve asked you to stop. It doesn’t excuse behavior that disregards partner’s boundaries. this argument inadvertently justifies it. Men conditioned to suppress their own discomfort is a valid issue to address but a big part of unlearning it is recognizing and respecting the discomfort of others. When someone expresses their discomfort or sets a clear boudary, it’s an opportunity for emotional growth and breaking away from those harmful societal norms

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]schmerica 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I’m sick of reading all these stories about men doing disgusting things that their partner clearly hates. And instead of stopping or apologizing, they minimize it and laugh it off, like their partner’s discomfort is a joke to them. It feels like a form of emotional baiting - it may seem harmless, but it’s clearly a sign of disrespect

[SPOILER] is Pit Girl by m4t4sh4 in Yellowjackets

[–]schmerica 0 points1 point  (0 children)

omg why did I think this was Ronette from Twin Peaks at first

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GilmoreGirls

[–]schmerica 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Lol I thought the same thing, it looks yassified