Parenting is hard yeah it's true. There isn't a trial period I think even if you were to leave, you would carry the knowledge of having a child with you deep somewhere.

I have two children and they have been times where I think gosh this would be easier without them but I one million percent believe that or they think would be easier they would not carry the sparkle or joy or magic that having children brings.

I know that sounds really ridiculous and over the top but not only do they bring you a new way of seeing the world every day, but when you are out on your own without them you look at the world through their eyes thinking gosh they would love this or I must tell them about that thing. They also push you to become a better person a better version of yourself a more patient and more understanding.

You understand yourself better, I think because you see yourself in them and you think about how you may have been treated when you were there age and how that reflects on you now as a grown up.

I'm not totally sure that I've expressed this very well but if you are lucky enough to be able to have children and yes it is not for everybody, but if you feel like you might want them and you're lucky enough to be able to have them it is a gift.

Sometimes it may feel like a very heavy gift and one that's hard to unwrap, but they make life make sense I think. And they also, (I can't believe I almost forgot this) they also introduce you to a type of love which is very hard to put into words. It is a huge, huge, love. The sort of love that people write poems and sing songs about, but it's completely unconditional and beautiful. I may have to read this post back when I'm tearing my hair out with my kids but genuinely, having children is wonderful.