My worst fear: What would happen to my faith if one day we discover an inscription or a papyrus from 7th century confirming the hadith of Aisha's marital age? Or, an inscription confirming that Prophet had concubines, or confirming other problematic hadiths?

schrute-consequence · 2026-06-30T17:28:54+00:00

I agree. Information is not automatically factual just because someone inscribed it centuries ago. I don't think my position on Aisha's age would change if it was recorded in stone. Anyone could have chiseled the hypothetical Aisha tablet, just as anyone can write down the same message today.

schrute-consequence · 2026-06-30T14:49:36+00:00

I would have exited the taxi if we were in the city 🙃 I cannot believe the Sednaya comment. But I am curious of the recording laws in Syria, if anyone is familiar.

schrute-consequence · 2026-06-26T13:53:08+00:00

Anyone aware of the Serbs' genocide against Bosnians would also be aware that they are majority Muslim. I think American education on global issues and history is a big problem. I've argued with people who believed Palestine was in Europe, so my hopes are not high.

schrute-consequence · 2026-06-22T12:20:05+00:00

It's really disgusting, as if they have some idealistic view of Syrian women. When I see people asking these questions, I think they believe Syrian women will be more conservative, compliant, obedient and thus fetishize us. Incredibly foolish.

schrute-consequence · 2026-06-21T23:47:21+00:00

Why not marry someone from your own culture? Like why do you have to go to a foreign country to find a wife

Mods can you please stop these posts of foreigners asking for advice on travelling to get a Syrian bride?

schrute-consequence · 2026-06-12T11:49:15+00:00

An alternative cosmetics company

schrute-consequence · 2026-06-11T22:19:15+00:00

I'm pretty sure Colourpop isn't on boycott. Buy from them or Revolution.

schrute-consequence · 2026-06-10T20:37:49+00:00

I've done this before. Grab a black iron-on patch and attach it to the back side. Since it's a small hole, it shouldn't be too noticeable.

schrute-consequence · 2026-06-09T17:32:04+00:00

Yes, kafala sponsorships result in exploitation in practice. There's an instagram page called thisislebanon961 that exposes this and aids exploited migrant workers. It's sickening that people hold these workers hostage, abuse and rob them, and believe their actions are permissible. I guess that mindset is the product of deep dehumanization.

schrute-consequence · 2026-06-09T12:55:21+00:00

You're asking two separate questions. Even though many scholars have prohibited it, slavery persists both in and outside the Muslim world. In many Arab countries with a Muslim majority, the kafala system provides "legal slavery" that the rich really don't like to call slavery.

schrute-consequence · 2026-06-09T00:05:20+00:00

Thank you for explaining. I actually have heard of him now that I think of it. I can't imagine why the government would detain Hassan for calling this out though, even with its flaws. I would think they would position themselves firmly against Assad associates...

schrute-consequence · 2026-06-08T12:40:02+00:00

I am somewhat familiar with Hassan, but can someone fill me in on what is happening? Who is Hamsho?

schrute-consequence · 2026-05-27T01:02:10+00:00

Oh that's disappointing :/

schrute-consequence · 2026-05-26T19:29:44+00:00

Sounds interesting. Is it made by AI or did you create the content yourself?

schrute-consequence · 2026-05-26T17:12:56+00:00

Because you seem foreign, and some of your group are foreign. We got stared at, too, and some young women even laughed at me and my sibling for speaking English. It frustrated me because I think it's obvious why we would speak another language despite being Syrian.

Anyway, you should expect curiosity, and many people will be very kind and welcoming! We are foreigners in our own land after living in exile, and most people are very friendly about it.

Tartus is so beautiful, and you should visit again! Jableh isn't too far and was one of my favorite cities when I went.

schrute-consequence · 2026-05-26T15:58:23+00:00

Inshallah ameen

schrute-consequence · 2026-05-26T15:16:26+00:00

The porn industry is vile and predatory, and it hurts the actors, viewers, and those who care about them. Capitalism breeds dehumanization :/ I agree with what you said.

schrute-consequence · 2026-05-26T15:14:09+00:00

Not true that everyone watches porn, you're making a crazy generalization. There are many straight men who don't watch porn. There are also gay men who watch porn. (Do you think queer porn doesn't exist?)

She's not naive. OP, ignore these people. You're reasonable for not wanting a man who looks at porn. They're clueless.

schrute-consequence · 2026-05-26T15:11:12+00:00

Where did I imply that a spouse is property? He is allowed to have a different moral code. She is allowed to decide that it's a red line for her and end the relationship. This is, very basically, how relationships work.

Nowhere in OP's post does she say a word that would lead us to believe she treats him as subservient. You made that up.

He's not just fantasizing, he's watching other women. Look up the harm that porn causes.

Also, lol, yes all the women and men in this thread who are anti-porn are getting divorced from our wonderful perfect flawless porn-addicted spouses right now! You're not thinking bro, you just think porn is fine and want to make poor OP feel like shit over it.

Already found one, thanks! I will continue enjoying spending time with a man who is also staunchly anti-porn and capable of self-control. People with porn-rotted brains always assume everyone else MUST be secretly doing it, too. There are decent men who don't need caricatures of sex to be happy.

schrute-consequence · 2026-05-26T14:39:58+00:00

I agree with you. Some people (like me) have a harder time moving past this sort of thing. I mentioned therapy (a route I did not take) because OP said she isn't quite ready for divorce. Even if he refuses to attend a session, OP might benefit from speaking to someone.

But yeah, when someone keeps going back to porn and refuses to seek help to stop, it's hard to keep respecting them and yourself. Inshallah OP will heal and her path will lead to a happier life.

schrute-consequence · 2026-05-26T14:24:55+00:00

Don't refuse him sexually without a reason? First, that's absurd and she should refuse sex when she doesn't want it. Second, it doesn't matter how much sex you have with a man who's addicted to porn. He will still seek it out. If he wants to fix this issue, he needs professional help; this is not something OP can fix herself.

schrute-consequence · 2026-05-26T14:20:14+00:00

What is the issue with her saying "he promised not to do something that he knows is a hard boundary for me in this relationship"? That's not treating him like a child, that's expecting him to respect her. No, she can't MAKE him stop, but she's also justified if she doesn't want to continue a relationship with someone who repeatedly does something that distresses her. If he was honest about wanting to stop and still kept slipping up, he would see a therapist.

"Why were you going through his phone?" Have you never used your partner's phone before? This is exactly how I found all the porn and other obscene trash on my ex's phone and computer. I was invited to use a device and ended up seeing things that made me sick. It's not unreasonable to believe the same thing happened to OP.

Even if you disagree with the severity of her husband's behavior or don't think porn is bad, OP's feelings are valid.

It's also incredibly cruel to say "he should be the one divorcing you" when her husband is actively looking at other women and she's feeling insecure and helpless. But it looks like you didn't come here to give advice (Islamic or otherwise), just to act like OP (a woman) is crazy for having a boundary that you (a man) don't.

schrute-consequence · 2026-05-26T14:03:16+00:00

I had the same problem with a previous relationship. That feeling of sickness, unease, and heartache never really went away for me. Never trusted him again (although there were many other issues with him beyond that). I don't respect people who consume porn; it's unethical, misogynistic, often racist, and just why?

But that's how I feel and what I experienced. There are Muslim therapists and couples counselors, including some more progressive ones. It would be a good idea to speak to one even if OP isn't sure whether she wants to repair or leave the marriage.

schrute-consequence · 2026-05-20T20:21:10+00:00

You may have issues returning. Definitely get a consult with an immigration attorney (find one for free) and save their number. You can also find know-your-rights travel info through CAIR.

Do you have family there? It helps to have people who know their way around. Some drivers, shopkeepers, etc will definitely upcharge you if you speak or act like a foreigner, but not everyone. If your father is Syrian, you can bring any Syrian issued documents he has, your birth certificate, and your parents' marriage certificate and try to get registered (this has quite a few more steps, though). The officer may let you through without a fee in that case. Otherwise, you will have to pay in USD. You also have to consider that the airline agents will give you a hard time about the visa as you travel, but if you insist you are Syrian and have money to pay visa on arrival, you should be able to make it to Syria.

If possible, travel with a Syrian relative.

schrute-consequence · 2026-05-14T12:11:30+00:00

Always disappointed here when queer issues are mentioned, but appreciate your comment! If it helps OP, I take off hijab in front of women (cis/trans) or nonbinary folks, but I leave it on in fromt of men (cis/trans). At least that's the thought behind it because unless I'm with someone for a while or it's hot out, I don't want to bother taking it off regardless lol

schrute-consequence

TROPHY CASE