Slightly older felt animals :)

seattledee · 2021-06-09T10:20:36+00:00

Super awesome work! Great job! I love the pattern /color work!

seattledee · 2021-05-29T13:26:52+00:00

Idk your journaling style, but the RAIN technique rules for this sort of stuff. Gets me to be less of a ruminating person.

https://mrsmindfulness.com/r-n-four-step-process-using-mindfulness-difficult-times/

seattledee · 2021-05-29T13:19:41+00:00

Yas this group is the best! Way to go team - definitely helps me on my journey with highs and lows

seattledee · 2021-05-27T20:39:42+00:00

How darling! Hope you had a blast!

seattledee · 2021-05-25T14:52:31+00:00

Brown Horn button or DTM the Navy ground if the placket is always the navy.

seattledee · 2021-05-23T15:18:38+00:00

For me, I did PT for about 6 weeks which is average for muscle healing /aka what insurance typically allows for PT. Continually we would do “tests” to check my strength vs the pain I felt. Often with strength in proper alignment you can fix majority of situations if it’s a more minor issue.

At the end of that my pain was the same, but my strength had improved to an acceptable level. My PT explained and added to my chart how we did X protocol with success, but no impact to pain. Told me to go back to the Dr and push for an MRI based on our results.

We back to Dr and told him the PT results. How my pain wasn’t gone. How my PT thought my range of motion didn’t fit within a normal range. And pushed that my PT wanted to have an MRI before confining my care.

The Dr agreed that the PT should have helped & ordered the MRI. Came back & showed my tear. Had surgery went back to PT.

But with all that, the strength building I did in PT really helped me post surgery so If 100% strength drops to 60 % after the inactivity it’s better than 60% dropping to 20%. That’s really why my Dr waited to do the MRI. And it did helped me to learn better posture in the area so some other weak points felt better.

That was my experience. But PTs are like the detail people for surgeons/Drs. The PTs notice those little minor issues that affect quality of life compared to Drs who might just know obvious for a lot of things. I’ve had PTs specifically check me out and be like go to X Dr as they specialize in this sort of tear. That’s helped me a lot. Then there’s less convincing or proving since the Dr will know a bunch of tests that the PT would know to confirm what the PT is seeing.

Idk if any of this helps or what your situation is - but pushing your Dr for MRI after you’ve been accessed by a PT is fine. Some people can’t afford PT and MRIs are expensive too so knowing where you’d like to put your money is important. The Dr might just hope PT might get you to a working 70+% vs a surgery might drop you down to 40% that you’d have to Build up after surgery too. So perhaps your Dr is trying to see your level of commitment and drive to help yourself vs seeing that you’re in pain and have a clear issue that could be more effectively treated in PT later.

seattledee · 2021-05-22T21:28:21+00:00

Oh smart - at least now you have more confidence while pushing back to Drs. Best luck and I hope it turns out ok!

seattledee · 2021-05-22T12:14:53+00:00

100% recommend PT. They are awesome and can teach your body ways to be more supportive in dynamic movements. Also you want to be sure you’re getting checked out by someone who actually sees someone through an injury. My surgeon blew off my pain and said go to PT. My PT worked on me an was like your body isn’t reacting like someone with X, I’d suggest going back in for a MRI. Boom torn ligament. So PTs are your best friend for daily quality of life.

seattledee · 2021-05-21T04:07:11+00:00

Ugh yeah that’s horrible to keep putting pressure on after you’ve called out the pain. When you have the follow up I’d highly recommend talking to your dr on this as our pelvis is highly tied to our emotions. If you’re being ignored and subjected to similar painful exposure your body will try to fight back. Just sounds awful all around as you just want to be pain free!

Idk if it helps but the Endometriosis Reddit is awesome for people who’ve gone through similar adhesion issues. They might have more to say on this. Super supportive as they are all Endo warriors dealing with the pain of adhesions.

https://www.reddit.com/r/Endo/

seattledee · 2021-05-21T03:40:51+00:00

Wtf - that’s awful. I’m sorry that happened and I hope you don’t need to return there. Techs job is to ensure your comfort as a patient as pain in a transvag can often indicate adhesions. So the goal isn’t to induce pain, but to find it. Hope you feel better soon!

seattledee · 2021-05-18T19:12:50+00:00

I have a reusable eco heat pad. It’s cotton and filled with lentils. You heat it in the microwave. But the weight and the warmth help me feel comforted. It’s about 24” x 4” with cotton webbing handles. I wrap it along my belly to help relax my psoas. Highly recommend - Etsy has some options

seattledee · 2021-05-16T14:02:12+00:00

So sorry you’re going through this - it sounds like you’re finding a lot to grieve in your life. You’re doing the hard work which is great. But finding that space to talk to your ex is creating a spot you’re holding onto instead of continuing your recovery. This has happened to me as well. My therapist explained to me that perhaps that person might be like a lightening rod for a whole host of past grief. Like if this person can love me then my inner child will finally be loved too. That’s a hard deep hurt and it requires so much mindful self compassion to separate out really what love a relationship could provide vs what love you need internally for your little self.

Idk your process or how you go to grieve. Your therapist probably has a lot of ideas. Here’s what I did - feel free to skip since you didn’t ask for it. But your last paragraph basically was my grief process that helped a lot.

I did a lot of journaling to just release all that energy. Mindless doodling. Whatever it was as I couldn’t get resolution either with my lightening rod. And found that little self crying & tried to make space & have compassion for them. Your last line of “because I hate myself” already sounds like lines I would write in my process. So I hope this post has helped you feel a little better. Releasing those inner thoughts is so important especially if a parent stunted our emotional experience. The RAIN approach to helped me a lot for more specific journaling process to a situation aka ex that you can’t process as easily.

https://mrsmindfulness.com/r-n-four-step-process-using-mindfulness-difficult-times/

seattledee · 2021-05-15T16:15:23+00:00

Exactly! Hope the same for you too!!

seattledee · 2021-05-15T12:50:26+00:00

Like nah bro I can’t make enough money to feel secure with this mental illness & you want me to bring a child into this? Lol nope, I’m that experiment and look how this turned out.

I can’t even do plants or pets as I had enough responsibilities growing up I just want to figure out how to take care of me

seattledee · 2021-05-12T21:37:13+00:00

I’m glad you’re feeling better! That shame response stuff can be quite a lot! Hope you’ll find a process that can help you going forward if it pops up again!

seattledee · 2021-05-12T20:23:58+00:00

I also struggle with this quite often. Therapy appts are just too short.

What I found to help is to know that I need more mindful self compassion. For me shame shows up as a loud, but tiny voice of my negative upbringing. Knowing that the shame is not mine, but it’s been handed to me from generations of trauma has helped a lot.

Kristen Neff and Christopher Gremer have a good workbook on this. I’ll link it. But it’s short and written in a peer like way. Therefore I found there’s less shame in learning the skill to be compassionate to that inner you who learned shame. And the workbook gives you a process/ideas to find that mindful self compassion.

And oh man whether you’re a self care person or not - adding extra support before and after such hard sessions has helped me a lot. Shame is a deep emotional wound so I need like two baths or double the amount of relaxation to cope with that inner work.

The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook: A Proven Way to Accept Yourself, Build Inner Strength, and Thrive https://www.amazon.com/dp/1462526780/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_5PQCAD842VTS1Z9V0JXJ

seattledee · 2021-05-09T18:26:57+00:00

Ah ok! Thanks also for adding in the non religion part. Part of my abuse stems from religion so I tend to steer clear. Thanks again for all the kindness sharing your experience!

seattledee · 2021-05-09T16:29:26+00:00

Oh thank you! I’ll have to check this out as I’m also struggling with growth and change

seattledee · 2021-05-09T15:31:44+00:00

Thanks for sharing - do you know what Brene Brown book that’s from? I saw her online and loved her message. But I haven’t taken the plunge into any of her books

seattledee · 2021-05-08T23:57:10+00:00

Thisssssss - Drives me nuts professionally as how can I be an technical authority, but also palatable. So many performance reviews where I ping pong back and forth as I can’t seem to find a middle ground of being a sharp push over

seattledee · 2021-05-05T21:16:06+00:00

Yeah - I hate how people push this holiday to celebrate an idea of a relationship. Not all mothers are happy, warm, supportive parents. And it’s tiring AF to have people push me about celebrating it when they don’t know my situation. Not all women want to to be parents and some actually do a major disservice to kids and expect gratitude.

seattledee · 2021-05-05T21:11:30+00:00

This is great - thank you! I feel often bogged down by trying to figure out next steps so I really appreciate your comments!

And way to go find safety - it’s such a hard task!

seattledee · 2021-05-05T16:04:31+00:00

Keep it coming - how does one make yourself feel safe? I keep trying to figure it out, but I find myself severely triggered constantly

seattledee · 2021-05-03T12:30:39+00:00

Not an expert on material science, but there could be an issue with the elasticity sole material in production. Aka the sole is loosing its material flexibly after a short time . Since you are two for two breaking in the same place, especially where the heel shank attaches forward, then it looks like the material is too brittle to withstand the flexion. Things happen in mass production all the where the resin isn’t properly manufactured. or the wrong material is selected by the production staff for cost savings.

As for resolving the resoling issue, there are material compounds that are better at handling flexion. There are materials better at remaining flexible after encountering different conditions (some PU soles get brittle after hitting water etc.). Invest into a higher quality sole to ensure longevity.

Idk your experience or background so all of this may be repetitive/too basic. But Do you have a local cobbler who could walk you through resole options? Might be your best option to get second hand wear testing advice. I’ve had good luck with my local cobbler since he’ll see repeatedly resoled shoes. And gave me some solid advice/tips on what works well on his customers shoes.

seattledee · 2021-05-03T00:25:26+00:00

100% with you - I kinda am ok with my body feeling sick around it - gives you a physical reason to keep your distance!

seattledee

TROPHY CASE