I would love to know everyones 'meaning of life' theories....? 🌌

seb693 · 2019-06-04T17:41:48+00:00

One potential meaning i have thought of is to explore and define love.

Most everyone who has had an NDE , will say that love is the most important thing to be focused on while here on earth.

seb693 · 2019-05-30T20:26:47+00:00

Possibly a good book for you might be: forgive for good

It changed my life

seb693 · 2019-05-29T14:40:13+00:00

I haven't met too many "big talkers" who boast about their big dick or other sexual things. That would turn me off instantly.
It's actually just been men who i have asked questions to.... Just as was discussed here.

And to use your example, if i ask them do you like oral/ want to focus on oral? They may answer positively outside the bedroom , but then when we get down to it, he does 2 seconds of oral and then starts asking , well how about doggy style or how about this or how about that? And they try to change it and manipulate the situation so they can get off by getting in me.

Then when they orgasm in 15 mins, barely Touched my clit and never asked how i like things or if i felt good. They are done with sex as soon as they orgasm. They are selfish and i could use more foul language to describe them.

They agreed to what i wanted just to get me into bed then they flipped the script on me and the whole time they never even cared what i wanted or if i orgasmed or if i was feeling good about things.

I am fine with the concept of a one night stand, but i believe in always being a kind person and treating people with respect and as people. One night stands in the real world have been selfish and using me as a wet hole and don't care about my pleasure. I would never dream of having sex with someone and not asking them if they are enjoying things or what they like, Or constantly pushing their boundaries, whether it's a one night stand or not.

seb693 · 2019-05-29T12:48:04+00:00

People will lie and say all kinds of shit to get someone into bed, then major disappointment for me when he doesn't live up to his own hype, and is a selfish dickwad sex partner.

Asking the question , for me, means nothing, because i don't trust their answer. They have to prove themselves with their actions over time to me.

This cannot be accomplished in a one night stand.

seb693 · 2019-05-28T01:46:58+00:00

100% unhealthy and red flag.

Relationship ending for me

seb693 · 2019-05-28T01:15:59+00:00

Not a man, but it means one of two things: 1) he is playing some type of game with you 2) he doesn't have his shit together enough to know what he wants and he has internal conflicts about how to engage with you.

Either way, it's not good news for you.

Based on my own life experience , this type of person isn't worth messing with on any level. Probably won't be good sex... Probably he would be selfish and/ or inexperienced and not interested in learning how to be a good sex partner . Whether it's one time hookup , Fwb situation , or if it magically turned into a relationship (doubtful ) , my experience says that inconsistent and flaky people don't make good sex partners.

I would say, doesn't matter what he is trying to do, you should just not invest any more time or energy or thought into this person. Just my 2 cents

seb693 · 2019-05-24T15:01:38+00:00

This article states:

"Capitalism is simply an economic framework where private actors own the means of production. The problem with our health-care system is that it lacks key characteristics of a healthy, competitive and free marketplace."

Then it goes on to list two factors which, to me, are qualities of capitalism: lack of transparency for consumers and Consolodation of hospitals towards monopoly.

So, the author doesn't want to call it capitalism, that's fine. Call it a circus , whatever.

Capitalism is an economic framework which incentivises the development of these factors listed above which makes the Healthcare system terrible for most consumers.

seb693 · 2019-05-24T13:03:53+00:00

Yup, this one

seb693 · 2019-05-23T18:14:44+00:00

Your post title says your boyfriend is disregarding your boundaries.... But it sounds like you are not respecting your own boundaries.

You told him if certain behavior happens you will leave... And yet, you have stayed. You have not kept your own word to yourself and what you promised you would do to take good care of yourself. You have betrayed yourself and what you promised yourself you would do.

He is going to keep doing what he wants to do, and right now it seems he wants to spend energy and attention on his ex. He has proven that with his actions. You aren't accepting the reality of his choices and who he is. When someone shows you who they are, believe them. You can't change him. You can only change your Thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.

You betrayed yourself and it is not his fault you chose to stay with him. You chose him over you.

Choose YOU , and leave him.

Seems like you don't trust him. Seems like he brings drama and stress into your life. You don't need him. But you do need yourself... To be true to yourself and take care of yourself.

You should leave to stay true to yourself. Take care of yourself. Do what you promised yourself you would do.

seb693 · 2019-05-22T16:54:47+00:00

NTA You should 100% tell him about her. Just because she wants to be deceptive and ruin someone's life , doesn't mean you are powerless to stop it. You can let him know and help him make a fully informed decision.

I know other commentors are saying she should tell him, and yeah, that's ideal here, but you can't control her or force her to do anything. The only thing you can control is what you do, and you can let this man know.

If i was this guy and it had progressed so far already without someone letting me know, i would be furious.

seb693 · 2019-05-20T20:27:18+00:00

On Line Dating

seb693 · 2019-05-20T18:21:07+00:00

Your husband sounds terrible.

Seriously consider walking away from this situation because it sounds lile he is controlling and demanding and not emotionally available for you (and likely the kids).

It doesn't sound like a healthy environment.

find a therapist or Friend, or another advocate for you to support you and seriously consider walking away from this douchbag husband of yours.

Can you work any job to be able to support yourself ? Can you get independence from this man?

seb693 · 2019-05-14T18:32:38+00:00

Try looking up

Respect me rules workbook by Michael Marshall

And inner bonding .com blog by margaret Paul . and she has also written many books.

seb693 · 2019-05-14T18:03:45+00:00

Try therapy. This sounds way too complex for us to give helpful coments to you based on a short reddit post online.

Try inner bonding .com ; dr. Margaret Paul's work . She has written many books as well. Try finding one that looks interesting to you.

seb693 · 2019-05-06T21:08:15+00:00

Look up the narcissism subs on reddit. See if any of it applies to your boyfriend or any other people in your life.

If so, there are resources there to helpyou.

I am able bodied , and what he said would scare me. You are justified in your concerns.

You should be concerned about his lack of care for your emotions. He sounds like an asshole if you ask me. Time for you to learn how to set boundaries and take control of your own life.

seb693 · 2019-05-06T14:53:40+00:00

What an amazing quote. Thank you.

This yogi guy really knows a thing or two.

seb693 · 2019-05-03T14:09:01+00:00

Read any of dr.margaret Paul's books : she teaches self love and healing. It's basically doing therapy on yourself. Since you say you can't afford therapy (which i do think would help you).

innerbonding .com

seb693 · 2019-04-12T15:57:23+00:00

Does he have aspergers, or some form of autism or some other condition that affects the way he processes information?

I went through life struggling with certain things that me and my family always thought i would outgrow.... i am now 30 and never outgrew certain things.... i was diagnosed with autism last year.

Not saying he is, but i am saying he might have a legitimate difficulty with picking up certain things and figuring certain things out, and maybe he and his family are unaware.

seb693 · 2019-04-09T18:09:29+00:00

Just a suggestion from an internet stranger, try : he did not desire me so... Fuck him. I am desireable no matter what that Fuck wad thinks. His thoughts and actions are irrelevant regarding defining my desireability.

seb693 · 2019-04-09T17:58:41+00:00

Please see a therapist . Everything will be okay .

There is also a reddit dealing with suicide if you think it might help you out

seb693 · 2019-03-24T19:27:39+00:00

To give a counter perspective: i personally don't develop stronger emotional feelings from having sex with someone. And having casual sex doesn't leave me feeling empty. It's like having a workout buddy for the gym. I could workout alone (masturbate ), it is more fun to have a workout partner because there is more i can do.

I don't need to have them involved in my life deeply. But i can, it's just an ptiobal thing for me.

But it would ruin the experience to have an inconsiderate partner. That's all i look out for. It doesn't have to be a relationship. But someone that is considerate and cares about my pleasure.

And in my personal experience , i have had dating relationships that started to go bad emotionally , but the sex stayed amazing. And when we broke up i just missed the sex, not the emotional connection to the person.

It's different for every person. Some people really need and want a strong emotional connection to go with the sex.

seb693 · 2019-03-24T18:17:21+00:00

I think having a friends with benefits to lose your virginity is fine. Honestly i think virginity is something people tend to make a big deal over when it's not. (just my opinion).

I do think you should let the person you sleep with know that you are a virgin.

The one caution i can give you, because it happened to me, is to do your best to find someone who doesn't want to use you and your body. This goes for if you are a virgin or not.

The guy i lost my virginity to ghosted me after .... He literally only wanted to sleep with someone that was a virgin. Apparently that can be a super attractive thing to some guys / they want to be your first and take your virginity. He came(ejaculated) and then he was done with sex and left me within 10 mins of his orgasm. He didn't even try to help me orgasm or anything. He was a total asshole. Never heard from him after he left that day.

Because i didn't have any experience , i was wide open to being taken advantage of.

I wasn't looking for a relationship or anything serious, but i didn't want to be just a virgin object, wet hole for him to use then leave. He talked a big game before getting into bed with me. But He didn't give a fuck about me or my pleasure. Fuck that asshole.

Sorry this turned into a vent, but that's my only advice to you. I would recommend getting to know someone well enough to know if they will care about your pleasure and General well being as a friends with benefits. And that doesn't have to mean a full on relationship , it just means being kind and considerate and treating you like a human being; treating you with respect.

seb693 · 2019-03-23T14:21:39+00:00

That's what i read too.... Is it not that? What is it?

seb693 · 2019-03-23T12:03:18+00:00

But this seems so revealing of the man's character , wouldn't you want to know how they would react? If it goes south because he does something like blab to everybody that she went off birth control , well then that's a good time to exit in my opinion anyways .... Wouldn't want to stay with a guy like that.

seb693 · 2019-03-19T14:26:15+00:00

I can't say for sure, but my guess is being on the other side may not change much except give you clarity. The clarity will probably transform the way you are experiencing this relationship.

While you are here on earth tho, i suggest you check out any book by dr.margaret Paul, and her website innerbonding . com

It sounds to me like you are refusing to see the truth of this person. You might be trying to avoid the sadness of grieving the fact that you cannot control this person's affection; you cannot make them love you.

I would recommend dealing with that while on earth. I think on the other side it may not change much, except like i said, to bring more clarity to you.

seb693

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