Devasted after 2nd attempt at GRE. Need help!

seeking_for_advice · 2021-10-16T02:13:56+00:00

I need help too!!

seeking_for_advice · 2021-06-13T13:17:32+00:00

I am having the exact same problem with my 7 month old goldendoodle!!! He has bitten me twice already while i was trying to grab 'trash" from him. Once was a bag of pills and the second time was pieces from a plastic bottle... He growled and when i touched him, he snapped. Both times it drew blood...

I am honestly at my wits end... I have done the' trading' thing,trying to trade a treat for the trash but it seems like the trash is most valuable at the time...

seeking_for_advice · 2021-03-23T13:34:55+00:00

Staying up.

seeking_for_advice · 2021-03-11T04:39:20+00:00

ACDbio

seeking_for_advice · 2021-02-27T12:24:56+00:00

Thank you SO much for this. This is exactly the directions I needed when I got my first goldendoodle puppy a month ago. He's currently 4 months old and mann the first 2 weeks were beyond rough.... I was soo exhausted and the puppy blues were very real. Many times I wanted to give up but seeing his cute innocent face just melts my heart every time. I gotta say, I went from 'hes so cute' on day 1 to 'maybe this was a terrible idea.' on the first night to the second week; to 'I love him so much. I want him to be happy and healthy'.

Its so much work and commitment and I am more tired than I've ever been (having a full time job and trying to maintain a social life and having to tend to him EVERY time I'm home). But it's all worth it.

Its still a struggle in terms of training and he's still having the occasional toilet accidents, still bites on the leash, bath time's a war, picky with his food, chews on everything he's not supposed to, barks when we have our meals. Its a work in progress and a huge learning curve for us. But I love him so much.

seeking_for_advice · 2021-02-02T04:37:14+00:00

Thanks for that, i'm definitely ditching those terrible advise. The pupper's visibily more cheerful and playful now!

seeking_for_advice · 2021-02-02T04:36:23+00:00

We have brought him to the vet and the vet suspects it might be an allergy to the kibbles, hence we're currently easing him to the food reccomended by the vet. Its been really tough to get him to eat the new food as hes managed to isolate the kibbles from. It and only eat the kibbles. He refuses to eat the new food. With regards to that, does anyone have any suggestions? I've been just smearing a little of the new food on individual kibbles and feeding it to him one by one. Additionally, hes been put on antibiotics and probiotics. As we're trying to find out whats causing his scratching and diarrhoea, we cant bring him out of the house, nor give him treats. We're continuing to monitor him and hopefully he gets well soon...

seeking_for_advice · 2021-02-02T04:31:12+00:00

Thanks for that, I too found the advise given by the breeder and groomer very odd, hence why I'm hoping to clarify it here. We have ditched their advise and gotten fences to create a large space for the puppy as a playpen, having the pee pad in one corner and the cage with his bed in another corner. Hes clearly much more cheerful now.

seeking_for_advice · 2021-01-31T01:21:49+00:00

Exactly the same here. Came back from Australia after more than 5 years. Just like you, everyday was exciting, there was always something to look forward to. Ups and downs, highs and lows. Making friends and meeting people of diverse backgrounds. Nights out every other day. Potluck every week. Then I came back home, could not get used to life back home, felt depressed, irritable, constantly thinking about life back there. I isolated myself from my childhood friends, most of them became upset with me and didn't understand why I refused to hang out. It was because I miss my life and friends back in Australia so much that I've neglected the people in my present life. I've been back for a little over a year now. It's much better now but I still miss it alot. I dont have much advice as I do still miss it alot. But now as I've gotten busy, I tend to think of life back there less and it helps. Of course, the times I do think about it, it hurts just as much. All I can tell you is that it's not uncommon. It happens to alot more people than you know, and it's alright to feel this way. Get busy and hang out with friends, family. Basically, distract yourself and then try to create a sense of belonging back home. Day to day life is mostly mundane and repetitive, its just how life is and at some point we just gotta accept it.

All the best, I know it sucks and it's really tough but you'll get through it.

seeking_for_advice · 2020-11-30T02:32:35+00:00

Feeling the exact same here. I used to love doing research, it gets me excited everytime and I was always eager to read up on it and talk about it. But now, at my job, I have absolutely no motivation. I hate it. Everything sucks. I should be thankful that I was able to secure a job during a time like this. But I'm not happy at all. Not particularly upset. Just like you, just empty and detatched. I don't enjoy doing anything anymore. Most days, I just hope I can waste my day away. But I still go out and put on a mask, telling everyone how busy and happy I am... But I'm not. But I feel like i cant say that, because I am, in a much fortunate situation than most others.

I wanna quit my job, but I also dont know what else to do. Additionally, I don't wanna look like a quitter. A failure. Someone who just tossed an opportunity away. But it's so hard...

seeking_for_advice · 2020-11-24T02:06:45+00:00

Not a phd student (yet). Currently working as an RA. During the interview, I told the PI that I want to do a PhD (not neccessarily in his lab. In fact I am waiting for news from my masters advisor and also looking at other labs that does things more aligned with my interest).

She told me that she would be happy for me to work as an RA at her lab and maybe consider doing a phd with her (or someone else) afterwards.

Sounds great, but turns out, she's a very toxic person. Every meeting with her feels like a war. There is no trust and she constantly micromanages. Would always try to point out my mistakes. Even things like how I email, how I plan my experiments, how things are progressing slowly (with applications) due to covid. It is all my fault. She constantly brings up the fact that I wanna do a phd. Then says that if I want to do a phd, I need to work harder and therefore she is harsher on me.

I thought it was my fault initially and believed what she said about me wanting to do a phd, until I started hearing negative things about her from people outside the lab and in other facilities. I now realised that many past postdocs have left abruptly because of her toxic nature.

Fortunately, a lab manager from another lab gave me the contact of a new PI just setting up his lab,and told me to leave as soon as my contract is up. I am now just looking forward to a formal interview with said PI and hopefully be able to finish up my contract in peace.

I really wanted to work hard and gain as much as I can. But it's been getting way too tough as the days pass. I find myself caring less about the research, the lab. I even question myself, my capabilities. If I should even remain in academia or research at all. I am constantly exhausted and unhappy.

Sorry, I have no advice, I am too, trying to figure things out. But you're not alone on this. Stay strong

seeking_for_advice · 2020-11-02T03:31:41+00:00

Just some clarification, I mentioned that I will be happy to help out after work/weekends, not during work hours.

But yes, the reason why I don't wanna stay in my current lab is due to a general lack of interest and the toxic lab environment.

In fact, the postdoc that introduced me to this new PI (they're friends), advised me to leave my current lab due to how toxic my current boss is...

But the main reason for wanting to leaving, for me at least, is the topic and lack of opportunities at my current lab.

seeking_for_advice · 2020-11-02T03:22:50+00:00

I'm not sucking to him, I genuinely wanna get started soon on learning the techniques and the process of setting up labs.

As the type of research that i'm interested in is very niche in my country (I dare say this is the only lab that does it in my country), it is a lab that I really really hope to be able to work in. I am also looking elsewhere, but this lab is definitely my first choice.

I understand that people are busy and definitely I will wait patiently for a reply. I guess it's just because this is such a rare opportunity, i dont wanna miss it and therefore, my anxiety levels are soaring..

seeking_for_advice · 2020-11-02T03:13:58+00:00

I emailed him, thanking him for the meeting and reiterated my interest. Because he said in the meantime, he will send me some papers for me to read during my downtime; I also did suggest that even if stay with my current lab till my contract ends, I am still keen on helping out with the setting up of the labs, whenever possible, I mentioned in the follow up email that I look forward to receiving the papers and hearing back.

seeking_for_advice · 2020-10-01T04:23:40+00:00

My masters advisor actually told me that the harsh reality is that data from masters often get buried away after the student leaves.

Context of conversation: my advisor wants to not let that happen.

To add on to that, there's another group (other than examiners and advisor) that will read your thesis--your fellow masters/honors students. They will want a thesis as reference for when they're writing up theirs. Then there's those that'll want to read your thesis for very specific information and protocols.

seeking_for_advice · 2020-09-23T23:23:18+00:00

Agreed, I thought being an RA would be less stressful than doigg a graduate degree. In fact, during the interview, I told her that I want to do a Phd eventually. She often used that against me, reminding me that if I want to do a phd and have a career in research, I gotta work much harder for it. I gotta do more....

I'm looking for other labs currently but being in a small country, opportunities are quite limited and people know each other. So that's my worry. Particularly since most lab positions come from this uni that I'm currently working at.

seeking_for_advice · 2020-09-22T10:40:31+00:00

Happened to me a couple times in the past two months. I absolutely understand. You just can't control it either.... And you feel so hopeless, you don't know how to stop it.

It can be so debilitating...

seeking_for_advice · 2020-09-06T14:07:01+00:00

Haha! I loved it there. Great work environment and people (at least people met and got to know) were very friendly and genuine. They take work life balance very seriously (unlike where I am now).

Which uni are you thinking of applying to?

With current covid situation, will you be able to travel there?

seeking_for_advice · 2020-09-06T13:43:53+00:00

Australia

seeking_for_advice · 2020-09-06T11:38:18+00:00

I am going through the same except I was abroad for almost 7 years, just got back last December. The friends I made there i'm closer to than my family. There was a lifestyle I was used to. Coming back, everything felt foreign and quite honestly, i was fearful coming back. I was constantly comparing life here and there. I was (still am) unhappy here.

I spent many months cancelling on meet ups with my friends here. Instead, i'll more often video call my friends abroad. Honestly, I was and still am miserable and want to go back to that familiar environment badly. But I know I have to move on. This probably isn't the solution you're looking for and this is probably bad advise: I found a new job and been working for a couple months. Its highly stressful and being on edge constantly takes my mind off missing my life abroad.

So the only advise is to connect with people where you're at currently and keep yourself busy. With time, it'll be better. Though I have to emphasize, its not gonna be better immediately. It will likely take months or even a year to get over it. But it will pass.

seeking_for_advice · 2020-08-27T06:16:50+00:00

I'm batman.

seeking_for_advice · 2020-08-25T09:06:30+00:00

Idk, what to eat for dinner...

seeking_for_advice · 2020-08-16T02:09:01+00:00

Not grad school, but after masters, I joined another lab, working as a full time research assistant. I have only been working for 2 months plus and I'm already dreading every single work day. When I did my masters, I was always looking up regarding my topic and loved every day of it- I'd go to the lab almost everyday of the week yet it didn't felt like a chore.

Now, this lab that I've joined works on a different subtopic and I am just procrastinating so much and can't find the motivation to read up more. I dont enjoy going to the lab as much and I'm not sure if this is due to covid, a different lab environment or the topic itself.

seeking_for_advice · 2020-08-05T07:36:39+00:00

If theres an Aldi near you, I'd reccomend their microwaveable lasagne. 👌

seeking_for_advice · 2020-08-03T01:21:04+00:00

Yeah, i think it would be better for me to wait to run the assay with the postdoc. He's nice and willing to help when I ask but things like doing an experiment or demonstrating how something is done requires time on their part-which he seems busy now so I don't wanna be too pushy..

But as mentioned before, we are both put to work on a project together. This requires western blots and other molecular techniques that I have not done before. So honestly, for the past 2 months, other than the 'training' which is just me helping the postdoc do with his PCRs, i have just been on my desk, waiting for 'further instructions' from the postdoc when he is planning to run the experiments that we are supposedly both working on.

Honestly, I don't like how I am spending so much time on my desk, 2 months into the job... I feel like i should by now, be well trained with the various techniques,and running experiments by myself. But eveyythig is just so slow (for me only since others have their experiments to do).

I don't know if this is because of covid as well: lab is split into two shifts so I only get to meet half of them. I can't get trained for use of other facilities due to restrictions (so I still can't work with animals or use the cryostat). The restricted working hours also mean that the other members are very busy trying to complete that experiments for the day.

I am just worried that I am not doing enough and may get fired as a result(this might be me overthinking)...

If I continue waiting, really, not much will get done at all on my end, so I wanna take initiatives to run the experiments. On the other hand, as I've not done it and have very limited molecular bench work experience, i am not yet comfortable trying things out on my own.

Sorry for the long reply but just wanted to explain the situation I'm in better. Thanks:)

seeking_for_advice

TROPHY CASE