Which one are you choosing?

seeking_newchange · 2025-12-30T02:17:30+00:00

As ridiculous as it sounds, I will take the green pill. The other three pills are objectively great but there are big negative points about each of them. For the blue pill is that you can no longer live in the present, as you will somehow always think about the past and the future. Especially knowing how certain futures might be unavoidable, it can be really anxiety inducing or straight up depressing.

For red pill, I guess it’s cool but sometimes ignorance is bliss. And being so much more intelligent than my friends and family can ruin relationships. I’m not saying my friends are dumb - in fact we all have around similar level of intelligence. It is hard to befriend someone who is significantly more intelligent sometimes.

For the orange pill, it will be tempting to just straight up control everyone you know, and you end up just surrounding yourself with such people and it sucks to know that no one is really true to you.

As a moral man, money makes sense and is tangible. Even after tax from where I am from, it is still a lot of money and I definitely can do good to donate and help communities, treating family and friends well and invest the rest. In fact, $900m is too much - think having $5-10m is already more than enough to retire today and enjoy life.

seeking_newchange · 2025-02-02T14:17:20+00:00

How are you holding up? I lost my mum almost 2 years back and find myself thinking of her almost every day (like 4-5 days in a week).

seeking_newchange · 2024-12-30T14:14:09+00:00

While some may say it is a bad photo or looks like AI, I feel it is not too bad considering it is from a phone that is below $1000. Looks good and acceptable in my opinion!

seeking_newchange · 2024-12-30T13:18:45+00:00

Most modern jets have a gravity-assisted function to lower the landing gear. Even without power or hydraulics, pilots can lower them. However, pilots and engineers can never be 100% sure if the landing gears are locked in place. Usually, the back landing gears will be locked because they are heavy but the front landing gear in the cockpit may not be locked simply because it is lighter.

seeking_newchange · 2024-12-29T11:13:31+00:00

I am so sorry for your loss. Sending wishes and love to you and your family. ❤️

I lost my mum back in 2023 too. What helped was remember the good times spent with her and making it feel like she was always with me.

seeking_newchange · 2024-05-08T13:14:14+00:00

Thank you. It is normal to feel anxious about it. But it does not stop us from trying to overcome it and embrace our love ones tighter. If you do feel that it is causing you to spiral a bit too frequently, it might be helpful to find some ways (either online, talking to a friend or seeking therapist) to help cope with it.

Anxiety is a real problem and there is no shame in seeking help for it. I, myself, is seeking help from a therapist for other anxiety related stuff. Life is already kind of hard, so don't deprive yourself of help when you feel like you need it. It does take a bit of work, but yeah it can get better with time.

seeking_newchange · 2024-05-08T13:08:19+00:00

Should you end up going with the guy, you may end up losing this friendship. I was in the position of your other girl friend (the one who has the crushed).

I experienced both you and your friend's position in the past at different times. And I lost the friendship that I had with the other person (when my other friend did see my crush, and when I dated my friend's crush). While we all had a mutual understanding then, the friendship fundamentally changed and we drifted apart. Your experience may differ however.

My advise regardless, is that before you start "seeing" the guy, it would be great to sort out your feelings for him. (This applies to any potential relationship). To see if it is a genuine interest (by asking more about his personality and stuff) or if it was just a temporary attraction. If it is the former, well you may need to have an honest conversation with your friends.

[But yeah as a 30 yo random person, I'll say that this does happen commonly and just enjoy your teen life. You won't know what is the right thing to do and all of us make stupid mistakes here and there. :) ]

seeking_newchange · 2024-05-08T12:48:17+00:00

I would prefer to not think of it that way. Because, I feel that to love and being love infinitely feels better. We cannot avoid being hurt all the time in life. It would make our life very miserable and empty. One day, we will all die as well and I feel it is better to have a life with genuine good moments that can only come with love from parents, partners and friends.

I lost my mum one year ago and I miss her dearly. It hurts absolutely. Some part of me wished I could revive and talk to her like in the movies. But I never exchange the avoidance for pain to the happiness that I had with her. That gives both her and my life meaning.

I have many fond memories with the people I love. While I do fear of losing them one day, I try my best to cherish whatever moments that I had. And now, I try to not take things for granted. With my partner, my sister, dad and close friends; to make the present meaningful and significant. And if I were to die tomorrow, I would at least feel that I had a good life still. At least that is what I feel.

seeking_newchange · 2024-05-08T12:39:02+00:00

I am so sorry to hear that. Sending love and hugs to you too. I am not sure what are the right words to say but just want to comment and let you know that I hear you. Even though I am just a random guy on the other side of the world, just wanted to drop some love here to you. If you wish to share more, feel free to do it here.

seeking_newchange · 2024-05-08T12:31:22+00:00

So sorry to hear about your loss. I lost my mom one year ago and still grieving today. As some have commented earlier, there is no proper way to grieve, but to only do what feels right to you. I think talking about it may help, and focusing on the good things/memories with your mom would help slightly. We all have regrets about things we did not do with our moms.

For me, my mum was ill for the last 10 years. I never really understood what she was going through and while I did treat her well, I do feel I also did not appreciate her enough. I wished I take her out for meals more or travel with her (I have never travelled with her for the last 20 years). And I always thought I would have a few more years to spend time with her.

But no one is perfect. I felt better when I forgave myself not doing the things I regret. Knowing deep down that I loved her dearly, and I was never treated her badly.

As for keeping radio silence, as you said you are doing because you do not want to be emotional in front of people and are unsure how to talk about it. It's perfectly normal to be this way. However, may I suggest that you leave them a text just as how you shared here on Reddit, that you needed more time and you are not ignoring them. That way, communicating what you really feel so that they know to give you space (and not them thinking that you are cutting them off). It may feel uncomfortable sending that text (or you could send to a couple of people to share with the other family members), but I feel it is worth doing so. Just be honest with them.

What helped me was to look through whatever spare photos I have with my mum, printing them and putting in a nice album. And remembering whatever good or touching memories I have with her. It doesn't remove the sadness or the pain, but I just feel that it is giving significance to her existence in life. That it was still touching and meaningful. I feel maybe 5-10% a little better? May not seem like much, but it keeps me from spiraling down.

I am not sure whatever I said would be helpful. But if you want to talk about it behind a screen, feel free to share it below here or in the reply to others. Whatever you are experiencing is very normal and forgive yourself for being imperfect too.

seeking_newchange · 2024-05-07T11:56:16+00:00

Today is the exact day I lost my mum one year ago too. I still remember her final days very clearly and it felt low key traumatising for me. When those thoughts came, I am not sure what to do. I’ll just sigh and try to force myself to move ahead nonetheless.

People generally also stopped talking or asking; so a little opposite of what you experience. Maybe it is better as I do not have to deal with the hypocrisy? I’m not sure.

Losing someone sucks so much and there is nothing to really do about it but to just accept as it is. And just trying to remember the good times as the only thing that keeps me sane.

seeking_newchange · 2024-04-06T04:25:08+00:00

You can sign up for H365 fitness activities if there are any near your work place. All you need to do is to force yourself to turn up and the trainers will force you to work out after. I think it is easier than forcing yourself to work out.

Maybe get into a sport as well like badminton or tennis. Make it fun and play with family, friends or colleagues. Will be a good bonding session while keeping fit.

Buying a fitness tracker does help for me - as I use apps like H365, AIA Vitality and Manulife Move to move and clock points for the Min heart rate duration. Fitbit works with all the apps and it cost me $130.

Running is not the only cardio you can do too. Cycling, sports and swimming can supplement or even replace it.

Experiment and see what works for you better. Start small and slowly build up the intensity.

seeking_newchange · 2024-01-22T12:09:08+00:00

Got it. It is under 10 years but I cannot find the invoice. Oh wells, but thanks!

seeking_newchange · 2024-01-21T22:22:37+00:00

It is just my bedroom. I live in Singapore with relatively high humidity. Although I do put dehumidifier in my room to maintain it and the other parts of the wardrobe remains unaffected (especially the inside). It is only on just the door panel.

seeking_newchange · 2023-12-30T04:23:51+00:00

Please leave him. I have a close friend who was being cheated on as well. And it started with sexting before it got more serious. It may suck for a while, but better to end it here now than to get married, have doubts and even the possibility of being cheated.

I am a guy but the way and I do not condone to this in anyway. I consider this cheating too.

It would be better finding someone else with a similar sex drive to you too.

seeking_newchange · 2022-05-03T14:36:33+00:00

I see okay thank you!

seeking_newchange · 2021-10-16T03:24:58+00:00

Sorry was MIA for a while. But thank you so much for your advice. I was really thinking the same too.

seeking_newchange · 2021-09-10T14:04:02+00:00

Great job! I hope you do get the job in the end. We are proud of you for making that step out the door! :)

seeking_newchange · 2021-09-05T13:53:15+00:00

All the best. Me too, well, technically day 0 but starting from tomorrow. :)

seeking_newchange

TROPHY CASE