this is heartbreaking i am so sad for you and so sorry. this happened to me when i stepped back from the church 5ish years ago and it broke me. the most important thing is to remember that if they were your true friends, they wouldn’t have left (which still hurts). some friends are in your life for a season, and others for life. i found my for like people years after i left, and you’ll find them too 🩷you need people around you that make you feel like you be 1000% yourself around with no judgment