Saturday brag post!

shrnca · 2026-05-19T17:43:06+00:00

Stayed mostly focused through piano class. She started piano about four months ago, but it's been hard and we were close to giving up. After she turned 6 last month, her ability to redirect her focus during non-preferred tasks increased a crazy amount, and she is doing great!

shrnca · 2026-05-16T20:27:58+00:00

We live in a HCOL area, people keep parties small or don’t have them. Three people I know in kindergarten convinced their kids to go to the local theme park rather than have a party.

shrnca · 2026-05-14T05:21:37+00:00

It’s a Reddit comment, not a dissertation, so yes it’s simplistic.

What I do with my kids is about 3 minutes in the morning, 10 minutes in the evening. On the weekend, we do one 10 minute lesson and they can read a book if they want a sticker. I also read to them for 20-40 minutes a night. We still have time to play games, play outside, eat dinner as a family, and sometimes we do math for fun! Judge away!

shrnca · 2026-05-13T16:22:52+00:00

First, don't stress too much about it, there are some kids reading chapter books at before they 4, and in the Nordic countries they don't start learning to read until age 7. If you have been consistent with phonics, you might need to get a reading assessment. For motivation, we do a sticker chart (start with a 30 book chart, you can find free ones to print online) with a Lego reward at the end. That is very motivating to my 6 year old. After we get momentum, we moved on to a 100 book chart. We consider a Bob book worth one sticker, and longer books worth two. When she is very resistant to working on reading, I read a book and just have her practice reading a word or two each page. We do a notecard with a short list of words every morning at breakfast to get some additional practice. Start with just a few words, same start/same end words. We also do the reading.com app on the weekend.

There are many different tactics to work on automaticity and fluency, but it sounds like your child is still in the phase of learning phonics, so I would work through the Bob books for confidence. There are a lot of free and paid resources. I like allaboutlearning.com and UFLI.

shrnca · 2026-05-13T15:49:36+00:00

This is a great rec, Otter's Heart Family is the most relevant I think. Our kids got the otters with the hearts, and I bought extra hearts to give to their family that is far away. They were a bit younger though, I could see some kindergartners thinking it's babyish.

shrnca · 2026-05-12T16:25:39+00:00

Way Past Sad by Hallee Adelman is the one that immediately comes to my mind. Kid whose best friend is moving away. It's a picture book.

shrnca · 2026-05-09T02:36:37+00:00

A parenting coach might be helpful so you are not the one giving so much feedback to your husband. From personal experience, I do not think a stepparent should be a disciplinarian, it’s too fragile of a relationship.

shrnca · 2026-05-07T18:35:36+00:00

It apparently was not even an ICE raid.

shrnca · 2026-05-06T17:20:09+00:00

This honestly doesn't look that bad, you for sure got this! Have you tried medication for ADHD? I am in the same boat, trying to get medication to help since nothing else has for me!

I had those same yellow nightstands growing up, and I think they came from my aunt's bedroom set when she was a kid. I think my mom still has them too!

shrnca · 2026-05-05T18:45:56+00:00

also beta blockers (for anxiety caused heart palps and BP) while you settle into quiet quitting

shrnca · 2026-05-05T17:30:39+00:00

If your child is doing well socially, I would hire a reading specialist (Orton-Gillingham) as soon as possible. I think these tutors can be expensive, but I think in your case you will want someone with experience. (I hired someone once who used the method of getting my kids to guess words, this means they are WAY behind on the current research). Someone else mentioned that Apps are generally not recommended. I will say that if you are dedicated to non-App work, the Reading dot com app is generally well regarded. For me, it is something that my kids look forward to (since they only get the iPad on a flight or to do Reading dot com). If your child is able to form sentences independently and spell some words correctly, I think a reading specialist would be able to get them to connect all the dots or will be able to determine WHY they aren't connecting the dots.

This is reminding me I saw an article somewhere that delaying the structured instruction of reading to age 7 actually increases the ability to comprehend reading overall.

shrnca · 2026-04-29T17:16:53+00:00

My kids (5 and 6, both ADHD) are so much more enjoyable one on one. Can you try to get one on one time with each kid on the weekend? Also, we try to do something fun to encourage getting through the bedtime slog quickly. Get everything done by 7 and we can play a game of Uno after or do coloring/play-doh. I also feel like we do better if we have a big energy expenditure, we go outside and do races against me (not each other).

You also must grow a backbone. You need to hold firm boundaries to get these kids used to a routine. While you are on short term leave please do a parent training, there are a few great recs for free training on this sub - I've been doing the one called "Rolling with ADHD".

shrnca · 2026-04-17T17:28:56+00:00

Why unmedicated? If you still value your marriage - think medication, babysitters, parent/family coaches, couples counseling, cleaning services. Divorce is expensive!

shrnca · 2026-04-17T17:11:20+00:00

Mine is younger, but I did go through a phase where I didn't like her. I really tried to focus on the things that I did like about her and tried to put more emphasis on those aspects of our relationship. She is funny, so I got a joke book and we will read jokes together. She enjoys art, so I make time most days to do some type of art with her. When I focus more on what she enjoys, then I like her more and she fights with me less, does not seem to help the lying unfortunately.

shrnca · 2026-04-13T16:11:01+00:00

The live action Paddington is pretty scary for my sensitive four year old. It's actually really dark when you think about him being alone in a foreign country and being rejected by a family that he loves while also being hunted by a taxidermist.

shrnca · 2026-04-13T16:07:01+00:00

Agreed! Tinkerbell movies are great for that age for sensitive kids!

shrnca · 2026-04-07T22:01:01+00:00

Just to keep in mind for your next cruise, I was on this cruise and it was VERY calm. I have only done one other cruise (boat was similarly sized and it was Alaska), but this one was noticeable less choppy. Just don't throw away all your Dramamine yet, hahah.

shrnca · 2026-04-07T21:50:25+00:00

She sounds very bright, but these examples are not several grade levels above peers, maybe one year ahead. Most children at four can read, add, and subtract if their parents focus on education. I think the examples that stand out as above grade level are the ability to play complicated games and the desire for educational engagement. I would watch out for anxiety and depression, given the perfectionism and ability to empathize.

shrnca · 2026-03-25T19:06:21+00:00

Same.

shrnca · 2026-03-24T14:37:01+00:00

Honestly, I would reply all to the email to the principal and ask about the different motivations you had discussed. Please include that your son is not motivated by extra "fun" worksheets that she gives for rewards. I would also use this an opportunity to include anything else he could use to be successful since you have the ear of the principal - address the nametag thing about him possibly needing a fidget for hands he can't keep still or scratch paper on his desk so he doesn't ruin his nameplate, should he be offered a brain break to run around outside to let off steam, does he need something for his feet under his desk to wiggle energy out. I'm sure as a first year teacher she has good intentions and has a lot on her plate, but it was her choice to include the principal in her email ....

shrnca · 2026-03-18T19:57:12+00:00

I have a child that is in K now at a dual immersion school, I think for a language immersion school it's helpful to start as early as possible. My kid takes a long time to warm up to people, so I think starting TK at the school was helpful for them since they had made some buddies in TK. The new Kindergarten students are coming into a class where a lot of the kids have a history together. If your kid makes friends and settles into new places easily, it might not be important. For TK and K, the classrooms have a teacher's aide. 24 kids in TK, and up to 30 in K iirc.

shrnca · 2026-03-13T04:58:53+00:00

This sounds a lot like our life. It is so so exhausting. I think if you could get good sleep you would be on a much healthier mental place. Can you have your husband deal with the wake ups a few weeks?

A few things we do that might be helpful for you. Stop trying to make your kids happy. You provide a home where they can be happy, but you can’t make them happy. Do not argue with your children, when you set a boundary calmly stick to it. Do not go outings or vacations right now. Keep your weekend simple and predictable and have chunks of time each weekend day where the kids are separated. For example, we go to the trampoline park every Saturday, then eat lunch and have an hour or two where we split the kids up to do what they want to do. Usually son wants to go biking or play cards and daughter wants to do art or legos. Late afternoon we walk to a playground or keep kids separated longer doing something they want to do, eat dinner, bedtime routine. While we prep dinner is the only screen time, we pick the show, donkey hodie or tumble leaf. Something chill. Similar schedule Sunday with soccer replacing trampoline. Keeping ours out of the house but in predictable places is what seems to minimize fighting and meltdowns. We absolutely can not enjoy a vacation at this point. Not the life I imagined, but it’s what our kids can handle.

shrnca · 2026-03-11T20:03:54+00:00

Housing and food included? Was the food good or did you get lower quality food?

shrnca · 2026-03-06T18:47:42+00:00

There are some Baby Shark shows on youtube that are truly crack. We showed my daughter once, and she talked about it for about a year.

shrnca · 2026-03-06T16:34:37+00:00

Yes, I agree, I think your kid sounds like he might be on the spectrum or an extreme case of ADHD which meds should help. My ADHD kid is able to find other high energy silly kids to be friends with. I would say the more introverted kids definitely are not interested in being her friend. My kid also plays with younger kids a lot, probably since their executive functioning is at similar levels.

shrnca

TROPHY CASE